


Drowning Your Demons

by deckerscrofano



Category: Wynonna Earp (TV)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Bromance, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/F, Fluff, Healthy Relationships, Mental Health Issues, Rehabilitation, Smoking, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-15
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:27:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 43,902
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26486422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deckerscrofano/pseuds/deckerscrofano
Summary: Used to being the outcast to her peers and now she's the black sheep of her family; they made it clear that they wanted nothing more to do with her. Rosita Bustillos had been hopping around, city to city. She's managed to pull the odd scam here and there to make ends meet...but something is different when she pulls up to Purgatory; A small town where everyone knows everyone, but no one knows her or her story. A handful of cash, her hockey uniform, and an attitude - I'm sure she'll fit right in?Champion figure skater Wynonna Earp recognises that look of impulsivity - something she was known for, it was almost like looking into a mirror.Wynonna has lost more people than she had ever come to know.  Trauma + alcohol = a helluva lot of mistrust towards most people, but she's different...each lingering look draws her closer and closer.- Wynsita AU -
Relationships: Rosita Bustillos/Wynonna Earp, Waverly Earp/Nicole Haught
Comments: 17
Kudos: 40





	1. Are you really happy?

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, I'm not sure how long this fic will be. I'll try my best to make sure it ends when it exhausts all other eventualities and to make sure I have meaningful character arcs and not half-ass it.  
> I think that's all for now...enjoy?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Wynonna's Playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3Jk2K31UYXNGGsN4RzsshF?si=ot_Cds85SCKiXiunAd6e6Q)
> 
> [ Waverly's Playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4SDdXZq61xrtHyMcAvJ5l6?si=vCRP14tOTya2FQp7uonkEw)

**November 2017**

The bitter air chills Wynonna’s flushed cheeks as she dashes from the homestead’s doorway and onto the slushy driveway. Snowflakes nestle into the voluminous chocolate curls that were playing catch-up behind her.

Waverly was already waiting in the car; she had been for the last 10 minutes. For a brief moment, she glances up from her phone’s blue light and notices movement cross her eyeline and leans across the driver’s side to wind down the rickety window of the jeep. She calls out through the crack which let in a harsh gust of freezing cold air, “Don’t fall on your…ass”, Waverly grimaced with hesitance to finish her sentence as she watched her big sister land on her backside after skidding on ice.

“ **DON’T!”** Wynonna warned and darted a look at her baby sister. Wynonna didn’t exactly land eyes on her sister as nightfall was approaching, she just knew vaguely where her voice was coming from. She picked herself up off the ground and dusted the loose snow off her nylon leggings and scooped up the backpacks she had dropped - along with her dignity. 

Waverly was still stretched over the centre console, she reached a little further to hook her fingers on the catch in order to unlock the door for her ‘now’ soggy sister. Wynonna catches the door as it releases and throws the two bags onto the backseats and bounces down on her own.

With a raised brow and a slight shake of her head, the young Earp asks, “Cold?”

“Nothing I’m not used to Waves,” Wynonna says as she pushes her hair back out of her face and puts her key into the ignition, flicking on the window wipers to clear the newly fallen snow off the windshield. “Coach is gonna be _so_ pissed” she talks out loud but not to Waverly who still responds.

“I told you we would be late” Waverly rolls her eyes in a playful manner as she watches Wynonna take in the surroundings whilst turning the car around and headed towards the crossroads. She continues texting Nicole; probably about how much she misses her even though they had seen each other no less than 3 hours ago. She pops in the left earbud and kept the right out, as she was always taught how it was ignorant to have both in whilst being with company. Waverly isn’t the typical moody teenager; she respects authority and those older than she is…she’s a good kid. Wynonna always jokes that Waves might as well barf rainbows in comparison to herself. She doesn’t push boundaries or asks for much – though that being said her recent request was to tag along with Wynonna to figure skating practice. The youngest had been attending the last 6 months, trying to pick up on techniques so she wasn’t completely clueless. Waverly craved more time with her sister as it seemed to her the older Wynonna got, she’d only get to see her at breakfast and dinner. Wyn pretended not to enjoy hauling her sister to practice when in reality she was just as happy as Waverly.

Wynonna pulls one hand away from the steering wheel and pokes her sister’s shoulder to grab her attention as she was humming away, “What ya listenin’ to? Wheels on the bus?” she teases.

She loves to rile her up, it’s just good ol’ fashioned sibling banter. “Ugh, shut up! It was getting to the good part as well, ‘Me & U’… you know by Cassie?”. Waverly looks down and rewinds the song to the beginning even though she was already halfway through.

“Oh? That’s old”. She pulls up to a stop sign, “Is it something mushy? Did Nicole tell you about it?”

Waverly’s voice heightens towards the end of her fib, “No? Course not” her eyebrows give away the truth. “Not as old as you”, she resumes the track “No interruptions this time” she pokes Wynonna’s knee whilst smiling and puts the right earbud into her ear as she brushes past her light brown loose waves.

* * *

“EARPS!” a husky female voice beckoned the girls to the centre of the large, almost empty rink. Beaming white lights lit up the ice whereas in contrast, the seats in the side-lines drowned in darkness.

Both sisters bolt to the side of the rink, out of breath as they ran in from the parking lot. Wynonna’s the first to catch her breath and takes the lead “Coach, I’m so sorry… i-it won’t happen again”. Coach Johnson was one of the few people that could make _thee_ Wynonna Earp nervous. Wynonna and her coach have known each other since Wynonna was a small thing. She’d always strived to do right by her as she was the only adult who took the time to break past all the walls she had built up around herself. Coach Johnson is harsh and blunt from the outset but she cares enough to push each skater to their limits.

There was already a loud bustling group grunting as they tackled each other on the ice.

The Purgatory ice hockey team was kicking up the loose ice as their blades dug in with each step they took getting off the rink. The figure skaters didn’t have a problem with the hockey team – the hockey team had a huge problem with figure skaters. They’d always made it apparent that ‘figure skating wasn’t a _real_ sport’, they’d often scoff at the girls sitting on the sides waiting to go on after them and this time wasn’t any different.

A voice broke out of the group as they pass by, “Break a leg fairies”.

Waverly had already taken a seat and pulled out both sets of skates, hers were noticeably smaller than Wynonna’s, plus the blades were covered with pink blade guards – which Waverly also insisted on having. The older brunette shuffled next to her sister and reaches to her left to pull on her skates quickly knowing that she was going to have help her sister lace up her own. She crouches onto the floor that was already drenched from the traffic coming on and off of the ice which soaked through her skating pants and the underlayer of tights. “You excited?” she looks up to Waverly watching her as she ties her long waves up into a bun and picks up the small skate next to her. “Push”, Wynonna holds her hands steady as Waverly pushes her foot into the skate properly. “Duh, I’ve waited 6 months for this day” she almost squeals but manages to curb her excitement by holding her hands over her mouth. Wynonna can’t help but smile at her sister’s happiness and continues to show her how to secure her skates properly.

The rest of their class was sitting to the side and behind the Earps…they were friendly but not friends, they’d make idle chit-chat whilst waiting for the last few members of the hockey team to come off the ice so the ice resurfacer could go on.

“Yo, watch it!” Wynonna snaps her head around to find the culprit that had made contact with her back and their hockey stick. “Oi, number 16!” she placed both hands onto the cold floor, pushed herself up, and made her way to catch up with the girl who had paid her no attention. “Never seen you ‘round here before…guessing you don’t know how shit works then. We…” – Wynonna gestures between the girl in front of her and herself “…don’t have to get along, but a bit of respect wouldn’t go amiss, ‘kay?”

Number 16 removes her mouth guard, “You done?” and takes off her helmet.

Wynonna was taken back as she was met with the same amount of attitude, maybe even a little more which she was not used to.

“The names Rosita, not ‘16’…” -- she air quotes -- “…yes I’m new 'round here, so no I don’t know the little ‘dynamic’ you fairies have with _us” ._ Rosita’s tone was sharp, almost as if she’d had to rehearse a defense all her life. Wynonna knew what that was like and didn’t retaliate like she usually would’ve, instead the shock of being spoken to in the same way she had dished it out left her speechless. She watches on as Rosita retreats towards the changing room after the confrontation ended so abruptly.

Her eyes stalk the shorter girl across the room until she lost sight of her into the changing room. Wynonna’s not sure whether she’s pissed or admires Rosita for not backing down. Familiar hands latch onto the older girls, Waverly tugging her back in the direction of the rink. Waverly had come cautiously stepping in her skates towards her sister to get her onto the ice as the resurfacer had just left. “Come on, come on, come on!” If Waverly was more confident on the ground in her skates, Wynonna is pretty sure she’d be jumping in excitement right now. All she can think is that if her sister is this wary on the rubber mats, then what is she going to be like on fresh ice.

* * *

It’s a lot darker now, though it’s only 7 pm. Waverly is still on a high despite mainly being on the floor of the ice with the number of times she fell over – but we love a trier. She practically skips to the parked jeep, her keychains tinkle from the zips of the backpack. As she hops along like a schoolchild, she turns around to gesture to her sister who was merely a silhouette in the distance at this point, to unlock the vehicle. She enters the lit-up area and gives the door a hearty pull as it shows its age by being too stubborn to open. She places her skates’ bag in the footwell of the car and slides into her seat to wait for Wynonna to get off the phone with the pizza guy.

“Wynonna?”

The older sister startles at the sound of her name and searches blindly in the shadows feeling more nervous than she’d like to admit. Everyone who knows her or of her has gone home and Waverly was in the car across the lot. She calls out with a light whisper, her voice wavers, “Hello?”

“Hmm…” Rosita got up off the curb and hauled her gym bag over her shoulder. “It’s not hard to learn a name before approaching someone is it?” sarcasm oozed from the statement. Wynonna cut her eyes as she slowed down her walking to an eventual stop.

“It’s you? Why?” Wynonna huffs and takes a couple of steps back from the girl that’s heading towards her.

Dodging Wynonna’s question she says, “What pizza did you get? Wait, wait, wait! Don’t tell me…I bet you got pineapple on it. You look like the type who’d commit crime even against pizza”. Rosita taints her words with a laugh almost mocking the other woman.

The taller brunette wastes no time and continues walking towards the red jeep that happened to be well lit up under the street lamp, “So what? You’re a stalker now? Huh? Eavesdropping on my conversations…maybe a little obsessed with _all this_ ” – she trails her hands up and down her body almost showing off as she moves away from her.

The tanned woman pouts, “Ouch, stalker…that hurt”. She follows after Wynonna.

“Yeah, but not as much as a hockey stick to the back” she responds almost instantly and hears Rosita scoff as she recalls the events that took place earlier this evening. Wynonna turns around on her heels to face the direction of the conversation after having a feeling that if this girl is anything like her that she will not give up quite so easily. “Do you, like…need something, I dunno…like a ride back into town?”, she waves her hands flippantly along with her question.

“Well, if you’re offering?” Rosita probably understood the sarcasm in Wynonna’s question, but in order to play her at her own game, she happened to take her up on the proposition and heads towards the last car in the lot.

“Wait, n-no I wasn’t being serious!” Wynonna’s voice gets louder the further away the other woman gets. “I- I don’t even know you…you don’t know me. I could be a-a serial killer or some shit” she jogs a little to catch up with the girl a few paces ahead of her.

Waverly could hear the chatter from inside, it pricks her attention and turns around in her seat to look out the back window and claps eyes on the two girls – one slightly ahead of the other barely able to tell who’s who. Now once again they stopped in their tracks. She takes it upon herself to beep the horn to get Wynonna’s attention since she was only thinking about her stomach after all that practice she had put in on the rink _and_ the possibility of missing the pizza delivery dude.

Rosita breathes out, “Well, I don’t think you are…” – she points to Waverly with her face pressed against the window. “Since you have a minor chilling in your car right now”

“Ooof” Wynonna lets out a small chuckle. “Don’t let her hear you say that she’s ‘ _grown’_ now” – yet Waverly insists on Wynonna cooking potato smiley faces at least once a week. She shrugs, “Still, you’re not coming with us. You got yourself here, I have total faith in you getting yourself home”. Wynonna pats the top of Rosita’s arm as if she was dismissing her from the conversation. It was all but too clear to Rosita that she wasn’t going to get in with the Earp’s easily and admits defeat.

“Fine, fine, I know when I’m not wanted” she bows her head and sarcastically takes several slow steps backing away from the girls.

“Really? Took you long enough”, Wynonna half-smiles – it was the first time her face had relaxed during the whole conversation. She steps towards Waverly who is patiently looking out the window, practically drooling as she can envisage the pizza being cooked as we speak.

She pulls open the door and passes her bag to Waverly.

“Sooo, who’s that?”

She air quotes, “Rosita…apparently”. The sides of Wynonna’s cheeks push the corners of her eyes to crinkle, barely leaving a slither of blue exposed to the wider world.

“Is she nice?”

“Uhm she’s interesting”. Wynonna knew fairly well that Rosita was her double, a sarcastic prick at best. She releases the handbrake, checks the time on the dashboard, and peels out the parking lot towards the entrance of the road that lies outside the ice rink’s parking lot.

Waverly presses her finger against the glass until the pink of her fingertips turns white. “She’s there, look”. Wynonna only managed to catch the back of Rosita and a cloud of cigarette smoke being passed out into the atmosphere as she sulks away into the dusk.

* * *

The sound of disgust leaks from Waverly’s mouth as she picks the pineapple off her slices of pizza.

“Baby girl, you said ‘ _can we have pizza’_ you didn’t specify the toppings” she takes a massive bite out of her slice and continues whilst chewing. “When you’re done, grab your homework” she gulps down her mouthful, “but not math, it’s not my strong suit”.

Waverly laughs as she goes to the bin to drop in the pineapple chunks. “Well what is your ‘strong suit’ Nons?” she mocks the way Wynonna spoke to her and sat next to her on the rug in the living room of the homestead, just enough away from the fireplace to warm up but not uncomfortably hot. She crosses her legs, nearly knee to knee with Wynonna.

“Look, I don’t really know. But the sentiment of me helping you was there…be grateful” the older sister speaks with a little husk and punctuates her sentence with another mouthful of pizza.

“If worse comes to worst I’ll call Nicole, she _always_ knows what to do…she’s so clever”, Waverly blushes just at the thought of her girlfriend.

Wynonna fake gags at Waverly’s happiness.

“Hey! Just because you are mean to people doesn’t mean I have to”. She only ever got defensive for Nicole and Wynonna…usually, she would be defending Nicole to Wynonna but she has accepted it as the norm after they have been together for over a year now. The eldest nudges the other, “See, that’s what makes you so great, even when you try to be mad you sound adorable”. Wynonna reaches her longer slim arm across Waverly’s back and pulls her into the side for a hug. She leans into her head and speaks into the messy post-practice lightly coloured hair, “As long as your happy Waves, I’m happy…yeah?”. The shorter Earp didn’t know what to say, Wynonna shows her love sparingly throughout the odd bit of sarcasm here and sibling banter there. It was still rare for Wynonna to just speak so freely about emotions. She nods, finishing her first slice as Wynonna places her plate up behind her onto the couch.

“Are you really happy though Wynonna?”

Waverly has always been perceptive; she lets things slide but she always knows what’s going on. It just depends on whether people open up to her.

“Yeah… _pfft_ ” – Wynonna tries to stifle her blatant lie.

Waverly doesn’t pressure her and instead snuggles into her for a bit. “Nons, you know I love you right?”

Wynonna was deprived of those words all through her childhood and adolescence, she wells up with tears but actively fights them from spilling out. “Yeah”, her voice shakes and Waverly instantly knows what’s up.

“I didn’t want you to be sad…” she leans up out of Wynonna’s embrace and sits back on her heels looking at her sister with concern.

“Ahh, shut up” Wynonna half laughs and pulls Waverly onto her lap for a cuddle. “I know you didn’t”. She brushes Waverly’s messed up hair down her back. “Go on!” Wynonna releases her grip from around the petite girl. “Homework and then you can call Nicole”.

Waverly up and went. Wynonna collects the other plate off the floor along with her own that was placed behind her only a few minutes prior and composes herself. _C’mon Earp, get a grip._ She places the plates into the sink along with the rest of the dishes and reaches into the overhead cupboard and pulls out a just under a half-full bottle of whiskey that she has been making her way through.

A swig here and a swig there has Wynonna drinking for the habit or whenever she ‘feels’ more than she is willing to accept.


	2. The early bird catches the worm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wynonna and Rosita get to know each other a little more, which urges Rosita to make the first ‘move’.

**18th November 2017**

“Bye!”

Wynonna stirs, disturbed from her sleep as the rustic walls of the homestead ricochet as Waverly slams the door shut. She sighs, “Fuck” and holds the sides of her head, massaging the temples to wash away the feeling of a looming hangover. Wynonna scoops up her fallen curls from the heavy night before and ties it into a high but loose ponytail to not put any more strain onto her head. She searches the untouched half of her bed for the phone she’d dropped before she passed out.

*** 10 am***

“Fuck”, this time she mumbles with the realisation that she’s working a full shift at the bar.

She throws the phone back down beside her, turns over, and flops her head back down onto the pillow. She knows Waverly is a morning person, you know ‘The early bird catches the worm’ and all that. All Wynonna wants to catch is another glimpse of Rosita, she was ‘ _fascinating’_. The memory of cigarette smoke clouding around her small stature was imprinted into Wynonna’s mind. It’s been a few weeks since their last conversation – if you could even call it that, and Wynonna has often been catching herself looking out for the brunette whilst she was entering and leaving the rink. Granted, Wynonna isn’t the type to get caught up on others, they’d get hooked on her but this time felt different.

 _Five more minutes Earp, then we prepare for battle_. Wynonna gave herself a short pep talk to ready herself for work, but with the regulars that were due in tonight, she knew it’d be a long day.

Eventually, she pulls herself out from under the blankets and shimmies her feet into the slippers that look as if they were kicked off before she collapsed into bed about 6 hours prior.

The first thing on her list was to brew some coffee because there was no way she was about to fight a losing battle with no caffeine.

 ***Phone notification** *

Her attention flicked across from the bubbling coffee pot towards the wooden table where her phone laid face up.

* **Baby girl** *

Wynonna pulls the phone across the table and cradles it into her hand, ‘ _Waves, sweetie. You’ve been out of the house for less than 10 minutes, what could you need already?’_

 **Baby Girl** : Just checking you’re awake. I did shout through to you.

 **Wynonna** : I’m sorry, Wynonna is asleep right now…please leave your message after the *beep*.

 **Baby** **girl** : Haha, so funny! Next time I’ll just leave you and you can be late for work xx

 **Wynonna** : That’s not a bad idea, my head is throbbing : (

 **Baby** **girl** : I have no sympathy for you. I have to go now, I’m at Nicole’s. Love you!

 **Wynonna** : Yeah yeah, love you too.

She pulls out her usual seat at the head of the table and sits down, cup in hand, and takes her first sip of heaven. ‘ _Ooh, good job Wyn’_. She congratulates herself but restrains from giving herself a high-five.

* * *

* **11:30am** *

Wynonna kills the engine outside the front of her work. The sign read, ‘Drowning your demons’. She’d been lifting alcohol from the cellar most of her teen years, Doc had caught her several times and gave her the ultimatum of taking a trip down to the cop shop or to work off whatever she had cost him. Naturally, she had chosen the latter and spent several years waiting and cleaning tables until a few months ago when she was of age to start pulling pints.

Doc was good to her, he never held it against her but he didn’t put up with her shit.

Whenever she was late – which was often, he’d make her fulfill those hours. In some ways she was thankful to be held responsible, it kept her inline (these days) with the law and it helped her prove to social services that she could be a responsible guardian to Waverly. That’s what truly kept her nose clean. Knowing that if she slips up, they’d put Waverly into the system and she was adamant to keep her out of what she had been exposed to in her teenage years.

She steps inside her home away from home and takes a deep breath of the remnants of alcohol in the air from the night before. Wynonna scoffs and speaks aloud to herself, “Ha, was a good night from what I remember” and hops down a few steps, her combat boots smack against the wooden floorboards which creak with each step. Wynonna slides up next to the bar and knocks on the surface.

“Service?” she calls into the atmosphere to alert her boss she’s here – and on time.

“Wynonna… Earp”, he smiles as he comes in from the stock room, she pulls up a barstool and rests her spinning head in her hands. “Did not expect to see you here after your performance last night?” he explains whilst filling up a cup of water.

She cranes her neck up from having her eyes firmly planted on a sticky stain on the bar, “Performance?”. The brunette chucks what hair is laying on her shoulders behind her and narrows her eyes in the hope to jog her memory.

Doc makes his way around the bar, switching on the rest of the lights as he stands next to his employee. “Course, you don’t remember” he slightly laughs. “Let’s just say that you better scrub this bar to an inch of its life…I’m not keen on the idea of where you’ve been”, he sits next to Wynonna and drops an aspirin into her water.

She picks up the glass just to the left of her, “Thanks” and gestures cheers to Doc and knocks it back. “So, what’s there to do? You mentioned cleaning the bar…”

* * *

Wynonna is well into her shift now; the bar is booming and all its regulars are merry. The old guys are getting loud and obnoxious as they bellow out their belly laughs and shout their orders to Wynonna from their tables.

“Chrissy!”, she calls and snaps her fingers from behind the bar as she’s drowning in orders from the punters. “Can you get a move on and stop flirting, the old timer’s at table 14 need another round”.

Chrissy flashes her emerald eyes that stand out from across the dim room, “Sure thing Earp”. She reluctantly moves from table 8 with the last joke escaping from her lips as she can feel Wynonna’s eyes burn into the back of her head.

The brunette watches the way the blonde slithers between all the bodies that are taking up a lot of the floor space and comes to a stop in front of her and leans her body half-way across the bar and drops the notepad in between the two of them. Chrissy allows her cleavage to become more exposed as her chest presses against the bar and pushes her bum further out – which attracts the attention of the punters standing behind her.

Wynonna couldn’t help but smirk at Chrissy’s efforts, “You’re such a tease”, she doesn’t wait for a response, rolls her eyes, and picks up the notepad to start making the order.

The green eyes trail Wynonna’s bare back as she was wearing a leather halter top. “And you have a problem with that?”

Wynonna doesn’t turn around but shakes her head slightly, “No, but I’m not interested in you”. She turns on her heels, “And you shouldn’t be interested in me, go find someone who’ll do right by you”. Wynonna places the glasses on a tray and pushes it gently towards Chrissy which makes her move off the bar. Chrissy didn’t acknowledge what Wynonna had said but focused on the four towering glasses on the tray, “Thanks” then disappears back into the crowds.

The brunette shrugs off the lack of answer and grabs the cloth to wipe up some alcohol one of the wasted punters had spilled as they collected their drinks.

* * *

“Hey”.

Wynonna knew that voice, it had been lingering in her mind over the past couple of weeks. Her voice soothed her, the stress of being overwhelmed with the orders coming through seemed to melt away. ‘ _This’_ feeling is new for Wynonna, she doesn’t crush…she simply looks, fucks and leaves in the early hours of the morning, never to speak to that person again. But she’s different, she’s on the same wavelength as Wynonna, unapologetically sarcastic and cocky.

“Rosita?”

“Wynonna”.

“…Rosita?”

“Look, put your eyes back into your head. I’m not here for you – which is a shame. I’m here for a few drinks, on my lonesome, unless you’re joining me?”

“The boss man wouldn’t like that”, she waggles her thumb in the direction of Doc who was playing darts with some of his old friends and sheriff Nedley. “I’m on the clock until 1am”.

“Ohh”. Rosita sounded a little deflated but continues to sit on the stool Wynonna had done many hours prior. She clicks her tongue, eyeing up the bottles stacked behind Wynonna. “I’ll keep it simple, whiskey…make it a double”.

The Earp’s heartbeat could be felt all across her body, no one has ever made her feel this way. It’s more like she has never allowed someone to make her feel this way.

She raises her eyebrows in agreement, “On it”.

Rosita follows the way Wynonna slips past the other bartenders towards the back, “So, uhh, what you doing after this?”

“Uhhm, going for a well-deserved sleep”, she returns with her drink. “Apparently it was an interesting Friday night for me, I – I don’t really remember the specifics”. She sets the glass down and offers a small smile whilst exchanging the cash. “What are you doing with your night?”

Rosita takes a mouthful of the golden liquid that left her lips slightly shiny which complimented the way the dingy yellow lights bounced off them. She licks what’s left off of them and puts the glass down, resting her pointer finger on the rim. “Not sure yet, I’m enjoying the view”, her coffee brown eyes set on Wynonna.

Wynonna was sure that Rosita could see her whole-body shudder when those words fell from her mouth, she held her bottom lip between her teeth to stifle a smile. “Are – are you here as a prank or something…how much did the hockey team bet that you could get in the head of a fairy?”

“Psshh, who said it’s the head I was trying to get into”.

If Wynonna had any drink in her mouth, she was sure she would’ve spat it out at Rosita’s statement. Wynonna shook her head and watched as another customer made their way to her.

Rosita couldn’t help but to just watch how effortlessly Wynonna handled all the pressure surrounding her – yet still looked beautiful. That wasn’t a word anyone would have used to describe Wynonna, yes, she’s an attractive woman but people would choose to call her, troubled and manipulative as that is all people knew Wynonna to be.

The taller brunette came back into view as Rosita’s eyes slightly defocused as she slipped into a daydream.

“No bet”. She runs her tongue across her teeth, “I’m here for a drink, and this town only has one bar – so here I am”.

Wynonna pressed both her hands flat onto the bar top and lowered herself down to match the height of the smaller brunette. Her words were hard to find as the scent of cherry blossoms washed over her, almost in an intoxicating manner. 

“Last orders!”, Chrissy called from the corner of the room as it nears 12 am. She sidesteps around the last few remaining customers and joins Wynonna behind the bar while the brunette continues the conversation with Rosita.

* * *

* **1am** *

Wynonna and Rosita had moved their conversation to one of the small tables on the higher level of the bar, near the frosted window. Everyone had left, including Doc, who had given Wynonna the keys to lock up and a warning for her not to drink all his booze. Chrissy had left with her dad who had one too many, Wynonna helped them into Chrissy’s jeep that was parked near her. Rosita and Wynonna had been chatting non-stop like they’d known each other for years and not just a few hours.

Wynonna was sat back on her stool with her feet crossed at the ankles on another, with a near-empty bottle wedged between her thighs which she’d take the occasional swig from and pass it to the petite woman. Rosita’s eyes were dancing from looking at the way Wynonna spoke about her sister and work, to take in the full leather outfit. She’d always linger a little longer at the exposed flesh in Wynonna’s distressed leather pants.

“What’s your position?”

Rosita answers in a quick monotone way, “Top, you?”

Wynonna flashes her blue eyes with a look of embarrassment as she looks up from where she was about to reach for the bottle, heat pools in her cheeks. “I meant on the ice” and shakes her head in disbelief.

Rosita lets out a heavenly laugh which serenades Wynonna, “Well you should clarify what you mean. I’m a center, you know cause I’m small and nimble…very flexible too”. She whips her head to the side to flip all her to the right and messily rubs her hands through it, accompanied with a flirtatious wink.

Wynonna was at a loss for words and her mouth runs dry which prompts her to take the last sip from the bottle and places it in the middle of the table along with the two cups they had abandoned 20 or so minutes ago.

“You smoke?” Rosita pulls out a pack of cigarettes and pops one behind the ear that was now exposed. She stood up from the stool and stretched out her back.

Wynonna lies, “Gahh, yeah!” and holds out her hand which was greeted with the woman popping a cigarette into it and slides the packet back into her back pocket.

They head towards the heavy double doors and stand against the wall of the bar in the blistering cold. The streets were eerily quiet, no one was about except for the odd car’s headlights that glistened through the trees in the distance. Rosita lights up Wynonna’s and then her own cigarette.

She exhales the smoke between her teeth ever so slightly, “What’s your story?”

Rosita for the first time this evening didn’t answer. Instead, she turns to Wynonna and pushes some stray hairs out her face that the wind was blowing across it. “Don’t wanna singe your beautiful curls”, her lips part as she smiles. The streetlight lit up where they were standing perfectly, Wynonna’s complexion was soft and milky even though her cheeks and nose were starting to redden. Rosita’s honied skin acts as a perfect compliment. They both take another drag of their cigarettes.

“My story? Phew, not sure we have enough time”. Wynonna has heard that before, it became her go-to defense whenever people tried to get to know her and that scared her. Wynonna held the cigarette between her lips and tugged together her leather jacket that had ‘Earp’ embroidered across the back that Waverly gifted her for Christmas last year. 

“I get it, you don’t need to tell me. I have a hard time trusting people too?”

“Ohh, that’s why people think you’re a cold-hearted bitch?”

Wynonna scoffs in annoyance but also allows a small smile to creep onto her face since Rosita was being so honest. “Guess so”, she shrugs and takes the cigarette out of her mouth.

“I don’t think so”, Rosita taps the cigarette so the ash falls and melts onto the small mound of snow next to her.

“You don’t?”

Rosita just shakes her head and drops the butt of her cigarette onto the sidewalk then pushes her boot onto it.

Wynonna watches Rosita stomp it out, “C’mon, don’t leave me in suspense?”. Her eyes seemed to plead with the other woman.

“What’s the fun in telling you, what other’s…and you don’t see in yourself. It’s my own little secret”, a cheeky smile starts to form before she composes herself.

Wynonna simply huffs, “Well if you aren’t going to tell me, I’m going back inside to clean up the bottles, plus it’s too cold out here. You should go before you catch a cold”. Wynonna points to Rosita’s exposed shoulders and legs. Her pins were only covered with black fishnets and booty shorts.

“I’ll get going then” Rosita dramatically pouts. “See you at the rink?”. Wynonna copies what the other girl had not long done and dowsed her cigarette then walks past Rosita to get back inside the bar.

Rosita was left alone now; she had a little regret in not passing on her phone number to Wynonna. She wanted to ensure that Wynonna had the chance to make a move in talking to her without it being an accidental bump into each other in town or at the rink. However, she noticed that Wynonna’s car was parked and got creative. She walked around to the driver’s side and started to use her finger to write her phone number in the dirt – this wasn’t her finest moment, but she had some desperation. She finished it with her initials, R.B, and then a separate note telling Wynonna to ‘clean me’ with a little sad face next to it.

The cold was nipping at her ears and nose now and she started quickly walking away in the direction of where she was staying.

* * *

Wynonna inserts the key into the lock of ‘Drowning your demons’ and tested the doors before turning around to head to her car.

She pulls her bag to the side of her hip to reach for her phone to let Waverly know she was on her way back home and that she doesn’t need to stay awake any longer for her – even though Waves would stay at Nicole’s every Saturday. As Wynonna finished sending the message, she caught a glimpse of the freshly made marks on her door. She turns on the flashlight on her phone for a better view. “R.B? R.B? R.B?” She seemed to rack her brain for the information of who ‘R.B’ is. “Rosita?”. Her heart fell into the pits of her stomach and a lump formed in the back of her throat. Wynonna added the number into her phone. _I must be missing something?_ She thought as she pulled open the door of her car. Even though Wynonna had been drinking, she hadn’t drunk enough to be over the limit.

 **Wynonna:** I got your note. And if you’re offering, you can clean the car?

 **Rosita:** Topless car wash? It’s a little bit cold – we can postpone it till the warmer months.

 **Wynonna:** You’re on! I’m about to drive home, so I’ll reply later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Wynonna's Playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3Jk2K31UYXNGGsN4RzsshF?si=ot_Cds85SCKiXiunAd6e6Q)
> 
> [ Waverly's Playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4SDdXZq61xrtHyMcAvJ5l6?si=vCRP14tOTya2FQp7uonkEw)


	3. Play It Cool

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wynonna asks for some sisterly advice and Rosita splurges some information with a friend.

** 2nd December 2017 **

Wynonna busts through the door of the homestead, throwing down her bag and car keys along with it. “Waves!” She quickly scans the room and finds her sister finishing her dinner in the kitchen and scrolling through her phone.

Waverly startles as she was surprised by Wynonna’s hasty entrance.

“Woah! Where’s the fire sis?”.

Her eyes followed Wynonna as she made her way from the door into the kitchen.

Wynonna didn’t register the sarcasm from her sister and instead pulled up a chair at the dining table and plopped herself down onto it. She squints her eyes and lowers her voice even though no one else was here, “How did you know you _liked_ Nicole?” she continued tucking herself in.

She was greeted with silence as it seemed Waverly was a little dumbfounded. “Wyn, we don’t speak about these things, are-are you feeling okay?” Waverly goes to raise the back of her hand to the older girl’s forehead but in retaliation, Wynonna swatted it away.

“Baby girl, I’m in a crisis. I – I think I _like_ someone”. The look on Wynonna’s face was almost as if she had received some terrible news, her forehead creases as she tries to figure out the next step.

“Ohh?” The younger sister tries to hide her confusion as she has never known Wynonna to like someone in a platonic way and definitely not as something more, not her big sister – she was the one who would taunt Waverly about ‘meaningless’ crushes. Waverly puts her phone down next to her empty plate of leftovers to give Wynonna her undivided attention.

“Well…for _me_ I knew I was interested in Nicole because I would find any reason to go and watch the debate team practice. As you know, I don’t debate…I’m Waverly, _definitely_ not confrontational. But I would go just to see Nicole do what she’s the happiest doing”.

Wynonna’s face sort of twists itself up as she tries to find the right words, “Yeah, no that’s not useful…there’s this girl” – She gets cut off by a high-pitched tone, “A GIRL?”. Waverly practically leaps off her chair and in response, Wynonna’s eyes followed the shorter girl as she seemed to bounce side to side. In order to contain her sister, Wynonna dragged her arm back down to make Waverly sit down again.

The older sister sternly points at her sister to hopefully shut her up, “Do you want me to tell you or not?” she was kind of regretting opening this can of worms and exhales sharply. “As I was saying, there’s this girl…” she watched as her sister looked as if she was about to combust with excitement. “and I think I _like_ her, ‘cause I can’t get her out of my head. Every time she texts, I - I get a warm feeling rush into the pit of my stomach and my heart rate goes into overdrive. This feeling is _really_ new to me, what do I do?” Her head collapses into her crossed arms onto the table in front of her.

Waverly reaches across the small distance between them and rubs her back, “Oof, you got it bad ‘Nons. Do I at least get a name?”.

For a little while, Wynonna considers it, but the sound of the crackling fire from the other room fills the dead silence. Wynonna rocks her head to the left to expose her eyes until Waverly partially came into view.

“Rosita?”, she puts her head back to the previous position.

“The ice hockey girl…the-the one who you flipped out at, at the rink?”

Wynonna’s voice echoed slightly as it was muffled by her arms and absorbed by the wooden table, “The one and only”. She finally lifted her head back up as if it was too heavy for her and shuffled her bum back into the chair. “What the _fuck_ do I do Waves?”

“Well do you know whether she feels the same?”

“I don’t know, I don’t look for clues of flirting I just notice when someone’s giving me the eye to bone…but, she is very forward with ‘sex talk’. I asked her a couple of weeks back ‘what position she was’ and she said ‘top’!”.

“Awww, you’re perfect for each other”, the younger sister tilts her head to the side as she finishes her sarcastic comment.

Wynonna’s head was resting on the back of her neck and quickly blinked her right eye open in response to Waverly’s statement. “So, what do I do?”, as she was finishing her question, she closed her eye again in wait for some sisterly advice.

Waverly sat towards the edge of her chair and gathered her plate and cutlery from the table and walked a couple of steps to the sink before she started to add the dish soap into the cooling warm water. Waverly was looking into the window which slightly reflected the top of Wynonna’s head, “Ask her on a date?”

Wynonna put her chair back on all fours and stood next to Waverly, pulling out the tea towel from the drawer to start helping with the drying up. “Me, ask another person on a date? C’mon Waves, when have you ever seen me on a date?”

“Maybe now is the time to start”, she passed the freshly washed plate to her sister. “We can do a double date, Nicole and I, you and Rosita? Then you won’t have all the pressure of it just being you two?”

Wynonna’s eyebrows raised at the initial thought but after a few more seconds of consideration, she figured that it kind of wasn’t a bad idea to have a double date, even if it was with her little sister.

“Okay, I’ll ask her on a date…tell Haught not to show me up”, she gave Waverly the side-eye. “You tha’ best!” She gave her a quick kiss on the side of her head and dropped the towel on the counter-top before trying to exit the room.

“Non’s?!”

“Yeah?”

Waverly turned her back on the draining sink, “I didn’t know you were into girls?”

Wynonna leaned against the door frame with her arms loosely folded. “Uhhm, yeah. Neither did I? I just know that I like her for her, she’s quite cool”. Wynonna held her neck as if she was releasing some tension. “Don’t tell her I said that”, she points her pointer finger at Waverly which prompted the younger sister to smile slightly accompanied with a shake of her head. 

* * *

* **Ro – duration 1:24:56** *

“I have a question for you, but you can totally say no…you know, no pressure and all” – Wynonna got cut off by a melodic voice coming from the phone’s loudspeaker.

 **Rosita *on the phone** *: Spit it out, Wyn…

“Would you like to go on a double date?”, the end of Wynonna’s sentence was a little muffled as words barely got past her lips as she started to nervously bite on fingers.

 **Ro:** Thought you’d never ask

Her response was quick, it was the most straight forward she has ever been with Wynonna, there was no sarcasm or an undertone of cockiness. Wynonna was silent as she listened to ‘War of hearts’ – Ruelle, play quietly in the background, she picked up on the lyrics, _“I can’t help but want you…”_

 **Ro:** You still there? Cause I need to know what we’ll be doing and what time?

“Yeah, yeah, I’m still here. Uhm, not your usual outfits. So, no fishnets or naked shoulders, we’ll be paintballing. 4 pm on the 9th okay?”

 **Ro:** Sounds perfect, I’ll meet you at yours cause I have a surprise for you.

“Cool, 4pm at the homestead…see you at practice on Wednesday?”

 **Ro** : See you Wednesday, bye…

Wynonna hangs up the call and drops her phone onto the pillows and falls back onto her bed, her mind flooding with all the things that could be the elusive surprise Rosita was on about.

* * *

** 6th December 2017 **

** * 9 am* **

Rosita’s boss collared her as she walked into the tattoo parlor, “Rosie, you’ve got two long appointments today. You’ll go on a late break with Mia as soon as Vinny and Luke come back”.

“Yep, sure thing”, she waved her hand to acknowledge him and headed into the back to start setting up her workspace for the day. She checked her diary and saw that she had an hour or so free until her first client. Rosita pulled out her phone to text Wynonna – it’d become a pretty regular occurrence for the girls to text each other updates on annoying customers or just about their day.

 **Rosita** : I’ve got two scheduled today and late lunch so I’ll just miss yours. No hangout today : ( **(9:17 am)**

 **Wyn** : Nooo : ( Can I meet after you’ve finished up? We’ll go to practice together. ( ** _read_** **9:18 am** )

 **Rosita** : Always, at least I have something to look forward to. Looking to finish for 6? ( **9:20 am** )

 **Wyn** : I’ll be there for 6. **( _read_ 9:24 am)**

“Rosie, what are you smiling about?” – Mia had become Rosita’s closest friend (as close as you can get for knowing someone for a couple of months), the boys are closer to each other so they only speak to her when it's them asking about a sketch or to switch lunch breaks.

“Can I not _just_ be happy?”

Mia’s head drops to the side, “Have _you_ met _you_?”

Rosita carries on setting up her sketchbook and looking through her pencil case for some colors to complete the design before the customer shows up. “You have a point… there’s a girl, and she’s asked me on a ‘date’ for this Saturday”, she holds her lips together to prevent a grin from forming.

Mia internally squealed and shook the shoulders of Rosita trying to displace her excitement before she exploded. “Tell me everything, where did you meet?” She steps back and felt for the small black stool and scooted next to Rosita with her chin in her palms and elbows resting on the tattoo chair.

“Hey! You better anti-bac the chair when you’re finished leaning on it”, she rolled her eyes and continued with her sketching. “We met at the ice rink…I’m an ice hockey player, she’s a figure skater”. Mia didn’t know Rosita enough to know that she played ice hockey so she was taken back by the confession.

“Ooooh, this is very Avril Lavigne-‘esque”. She shot up – which sent the stool flying backward, grabbed a small clutch of pencils and started a performance, _“He was a punk, she did ballet…”_ Mia was bouncing around Rosita who was a little embarrassed and kept her eyes firmly focused on the work at hand. The commotion was enough to attract the attention of their other colleagues, but not enough to intrigue them enough as they were sure it was just general ‘girl talk’.

Rosita spat through her teeth, “You better keep your trap shut. I don’t need everyone knowing about my love life”.

Mia simply responded with a tap of her nose and grabbed the bottle of anti-bac from Rosita’s station.

* * *

** * 5:50 pm* **

Rosita finishes a little earlier than expected, her boss had already left along with the other co-workers as it was her night to lock up and open the next morning. She pulls the keys out of the door and pulls down the shutters then turns the other key into the padlock. Whilst still bending down she feels a brief sting on her backside.

“Hey you!” Wynonna slides past the dark brunette and wore a cheeky smile.

“Heyyy?” Rosita stood up and slid her backpack over her shoulders, picked up her gym bag, and switched her phone over to her left hand to check the time. “You’re early?”

“So are you, I thought I’d surprise you but” – she drags out the last word, “It looks as if you’ve done that all by yourself”.

Rosita stretches her arms out wide which urges Wynonna to fall into the hug. “How was your day?”, Wynonna puts her hands in her back pockets of her skin-tight black jeans. She takes the heavy gym bag out of Rosita’s hand, accidentally making contact with her warm fingertips which sent a rush through Wynonna. They continue to walk side by side.

Rosita casually turns her head to Wynonna to continue the conversation, “Well you know, intense…”

Wynonna’s eyebrows pushed together causing the skin between them to pucker up, “What’d you mean?”

“I did a thigh piece on some chick” –

“Woah, Woah, Woah WOAH! Do I have competition then?”, Wynonna playfully slapped Rosita’s arm and stopped in her tracks. Rosita turned around on the spot to watch on as she pouted like a child who had been refused candy.

She took a few steps closer and hooked her right arm into Wynonna’s left, “Of course you don’t”. She flashed her warming eyes at her and continued, “Anyway, it took 5 hours and they only wanted a couple of breaks…my back is killing” she started to twist her back to relieve her aching muscles.

“Sounds like you need a massage?”

“Only if you’re offering” she quipped back.

“Oof, I like it, such a smooth talker”, she inhaled making a slight noise as the air passed her lips. “But no, we haven’t even had our date yet…I might not even like you”, Wynonna choked out after a little laugh and felt the smaller woman’s arm slink out of her own. “Oh, come on…” She spoke a little louder than as if she would of if Rosita was still next to her. It was Wynonna’s turn to swing herself around and dramatically tilted her head as she finally watched Rosita lazily stomp towards her and resume their previous walking position.

“I could do with some food before practice. Are there any good takeaways in this town?”

“I’m not sure I’d go as far to say ‘good’, decent may be a better word…”

Rosita shrugged, “Aye, I’ll settle with anywhere that doesn’t give me food poisoning”. Wynonna scoffed at Rosita’s desperation.

“We can grab some chow mein, it’s not too far from here. About a 10-minute walk or so?”

“Cool, you can tell me about your day then?”

Wynonna was first onto the ice. Rosita waited in the side-lines since she wasn’t due on the ice for another 45minutes. She spent most of her time on her phone; aimlessly scrolling through social media and sending texts, but also snuck the occasional glance at Wynonna once she was right at the other side of the rink so she wouldn’t catch Rosita staring at the way her bodied moved so fluidly. She was gracious, almost as if a feather was dropped and floated before it finally landed on the ground – that was Wynonna, she’d flit and float around the ice practicing her program before the Christmas show.

Rosita’s eyes fell into a trance a little too long when one of her teammates had strolled in to use the vending machine before practice.

“Bustillo’s!”

“Shit”, Rosita thought as the captain of the team dragged her feet across the rubber matting, whilst biting into her snickers bar. _Keep it cool Rosita_.

She pulls down the seat two along from Rosita, “Why you watching these” she jerks her head towards the safety glass which contained the group of figure skaters.

“Ehh, I was early. Kinda figured why not, no point getting ready yet”. She nervously smiles in the hope to give nothing away. “We know how heavy the gear is, don’t we Valdez?”. Rosita locks her phone and places it back into her bag.

Her teammate seems satisfied with the response and doesn’t poke Rosita with any more questions. At this moment Rosita feels her heart rate pick up a little with the panic as she knew that by possibly ‘dating’ the opposition, she’d have her loyalty questioned by her fellow teammates – she just didn’t think that time would arrive so quickly.

Rather than sitting through the rest of Wynonna’s practice with Valdez’s watchful eye burning into her, the older girl leaves the building for a smoke. Her departure catches the eye of Wynonna as she comes out of her spin which nearly causes her to fall however, she manages to catch herself.

“EARP FOCUS!”. Coach Johnson calls from the other side of the rink as she’s mentoring the newer skaters – including Waverly. She knows Wynonna is her best skater and she doesn’t make mistakes often so even she was caught off guard when she heard Wynonna’s blades dig hard into the ice.

Wynonna calls out as she feels some embarrassment rise through her body, “Sorry, I – I don’t know what happened”, she skates over to the sides with her hands on her hips, takes a seat, and grabs a mouthful of water.

“Save the excuse, no mistakes on the big day!”

Waverly watches Wynonna as she waits for her turn to be mentored in learning how to complete basic steps for her short performance in the Christmas show. A small smile appeared on her face as she had a feeling that by Rosita leaving, Wynonna messed up. She couldn’t help but feel happy for Wynonna and that she finally started to care about someone – or that someone other than her cared about Wynonna.

* * *

*** 10 pm***

Wynonna picks up her phone for the first time since she and Rosita had gotten to the rink and sees 3 notifications from Rosita sitting in her lock screen, she walks into her room, and before closing her door she calls to her sister, “Night Waves!”. She switches on the light in her room – which was far too bright, especially as there was no lampshade on the exposed bulb. It was one of the other tell-tale signs that Wynonna was barely earning enough to keep the homestead functioning, let alone nicely decorated. She slumps onto her grey bed-set and leans her back against the headboard before reading the messages.

 **Ro:** You amaze me Wyn. ( ** _delivered_ 7:00 pm**)

Instantly Wynonna’s breath got caught at the back of her mouth, almost as if she would contaminate the air around her if she was to let it out.

 **Ro** : You act all tough but look at you… ( ** _delivered_ 7:08pm**)

 **Ro** : So elegant on the ice, beautiful x ( ** _delivered_ 7:12 pm**)

Wynonna knew these weren’t the words that people would use to describe her. It seems that Rosita is the only person who sees Wynonna in a different light – like she understands her bitterness, why she’s stand-offish when you first encounter her. Wynonna’s heart was pulsating, she could feel it with her whole being but she wasn’t going to let her reply be clouded by her feelings. _Play it cool Earp_.

 **Wynonna** : Ahh, so you were watching me? **(10:03pm)**

 **Ro** : How could I not? You really are the best of the group. **(10:05pm)**

 **Wynonna** : You wouldn’t say that if you saw me stumble when you left the rink **(10:05 pm)**

 **Ro** : Ooof, I’m sorry to have missed it. **(10:06pm)**

 **Wynonna** : Piss off :D **( _seen_ 10:08pm)**

 **Ro** : Goodnight to you too <3 **( _read_ 10:23 pm)**

* * *

** 9th December 2017 **

Wynonna’s crashed on the couch waiting for Rosita to show up…if she was going to show up. There was some doubt in Wynonna that she was punching above her weight, that Rosita would come to her senses and ditch her before Wynonna gets too dependent on her.

Nicole had been at the homestead for hours now, she and Waverly had been giggling non-stop in Waverly’s bedroom however it seemed to echo in the relatively empty house. Wynonna was just glad it was _only_ giggling she could hear because the last thing she wanted to hear was her baby sister having a better sex life than she was.

Wynonna pulls her phone which was wedged between her thighs – she could feel the heat on the back of it as she checked the time.

“3:58 pm”, Wynonna nods as she thinks that she still has time for Rosita to arrive before she has to start seriously considering whether she’s been stood up. She pushes herself up off the couch and slips her phone into the pocket of her cargo pants, along with patting her jacket pockets to make sure she had got her purse before the leave. Her heavy footsteps from her combat boots make contact with the old floorboards and she rests her palm against the window, soon enough her thoughts get drowned out with a loud, hearty hum of an engine.

Wynonna’s mouth fell agape as she sees a black Harley pull up in her driveway. The singular headlight lights up the downstairs and reflected slightly off the fridge. Two sets of feet come bounding down the stairs, Waverly practically scurries next to Wynonna and looks out of the window.

“Wyn, she has a motorbike”, the look of awe on her face matched Wynonna’s perfectly.

Nicole stood directly behind as she hugged her girlfriend’s waist, all 3 girls were frozen as they hardly knew what was coming next.

Wynonna opened the door to Rosita whilst the other two got ready to leave the homestead.

She pulled off her helmet and shook out big, bouncy barrel curls as they slipped out from being tucked in for her journey over here. Wynonna could’ve bet money it happened in slow motion, her heart fluttered and her tongue stuck to the roof of her mouth now making her aware of every sensation. She licks her lips in hope to moisten them but not enough to remove the Chapstick she applied around 15 minutes prior. She pulls herself together and skips down the few steps of the homestead porch and stands in front of Rosita.

Rosita swooped her right leg from around the machine that was once between her legs and the younger woman feels like the wind has been knocked from out of her.

“Ta dah!”, Rosita did jazz hands towards the bike and pulled out a second helmet and held it up in the air.

Wynonna’s mouth finally formed a coherent sentence, “ _This_ was the surprise?”

“Quite the surprise though, right?” Rosita walked towards Wynonna handing her the helmet. “Wanna ride with me?”, she winks quickly and drags Wynonna by the hand which she clearly wasn’t expecting as she nearly tripped from her standing position.

“I didn’t even say yes?”

“You aren’t going to say no, you’re a daredevil Wyn”.

Waverly and Nicole came out of the homestead, the shorter girl jingles her jeep’s keys, “We’ll meet up with you there then”, she smiles to both women as Rosita climbs onto the bike first and starts tucking her hair into her biker’s jacket.

“Cool ride Rosita”, Nicole calls as she follows Waverly. Rosita was a little caught off guard that Nicole knew her name but figured that Wynonna obviously told Waverly, so it was natural for Waverly to tell her girlfriend.

Wynonna placed her hands gently onto Rosita’s hips to steady herself before she stretched her longer, slim legs around the bike. By now she’d got the helmet on – she was getting used to the snug feeling around her face but quickly forgot about the discomfort as she locked her fingers together around Rosita’s petite waist. _Cherry blossoms_. That familiar scent sat in the back of Wynonna’s throat, almost choking her – not that it was too strong, she was just taking deep breaths of the older woman with the hope to never forget this moment.

“Ready?” Rosita asked trying to turn her head as much as she could but failing as both Wynonna’s and her helmets crashed together, which caused a slight laugh from the both of them.

Waverly and Nicole pulled off first, the sound of the gravel against the tyres was quickly over-powered by Rosita starting the bike. A deep hum of the bike's power vibrated against Wynonna – _keep it in your pants, Earp_.

“Ready”.


	4. Am I So Hard To Love?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> * continuation from Wyn and Rosita's double date with Waverly and Nicole *
> 
> Wynonna starts to open up to Rosita, with the hope it'll help Rosita understand where she's coming from and why she acts the way she does.

“Don’t be such a sore loser”, Wynonna laughed as she playfully slapped her sister and Nicole on the back as she skipped in between them.

“I’m not”, Waverly’s voice heightened which was a tell-tale sign that she was lying.

Nicole rolled her eyes at Wynonna who was walking backwards and still showing off a cocky smile, “I am”.

The older Earp called around the couple in front of her to see Rosita trailing behind – since she was nursing some lethal bruising on her thigh; which Wynonna had accidentally given her when she missed a shot at Nicole. “Hey, why are you not celebrating with me?” She threw her hands up in wonder.

“‘Cause _you_ shot _me_ and they’re barely out of diapers Wyn… it was like winning with no competition” Rosita’s eyes watched as Wynonna started to walk back towards her.

“Well now that’s just rude”, Nicole muttered in a low voice to Waverly in response to Rosita’s explanation. Waverly simply looped her fingers with Nicole’s and sympathetically soothed her ego as she stroked her thumb over the back of her hand – since she knew Nicole didn’t take losing lightly. The couple continued walking to the parking lot whilst leaving the older women in the dusk.

Wynonna was still on her high from winning and practically spluttered out, “C’mon, there’s only a few years between you and them” she nodded her head forwards which directed Rosita’s focus onto the tall and smaller silhouettes that had gotten lost in the darkness. Rosita didn’t feel the need to respond to Wynonna’s justification and instead chose to let her enjoy the ‘win’.

The taller woman turned to the right and laid eyes on Rosita’s smaller stature and her perfect side profile – to Wynonna, everything about Rosita seemed to just be _perfect_. She looked down and saw the way the older woman hobbled with each step, “How’s the leg?”

Rosita smiled weakly at Wynonna to try and make sure she didn’t feel too bad, “It’s uncomfortable”.

Wynonna grimaced at the response. “I’m supe’s sorry about that, I didn’t mean to hurt you…I was aiming for Haughty”, the last part of her sentence was louder than the rest in hope to make sure Nicole heard her.

“I know you didn’t”. Rosita laid her head against Wynonna’s upper arm. The cold contact of the leather of the younger woman cooled the tanned skin after they had not long finished running around the paintballing field. They walked on despite Earp’s heart feeling as if it was going to give out at any second. Just that slight (not even skin to skin) contact with Rosita rendered her defenceless, she was unable to think – surprised she was even able to keep walking without her knee’s buckling underneath her.

“HURRY UP!” Waverly called from out the darkness, Rosita nor Wynonna could see her but they both responded with a groan that didn’t really count as an answer.

Waverly had a point to become restless since both women had slowed their pace down since they had started their conversation. The younger woman had thought they were taking their time due to the beating Rosita took during the game, however, for Rosita, it was partly due to her quickly forming bruise _and_ the fact she wanted some alone time with Wynonna and without the watchful eyes of Waverly and Nicole.

Rosita’s hands were already clammy because as much as she initiated the first move of cosying into Wynonna she was still just as nervous. She hadn’t met someone like Wynonna before…someone just like her. Where Rosita grew up, she was the outcast, the one that got avoided like the plague. Her walls were built just as high as Wynonna’s; however, she had learnt how to allow people through the door – whereas she had become to understand that Wynonna simply expects people to scale the walls instead. Maybe it was a way Earp deters people from getting close to her, but Rosita knew she had to find that out from Wynonna herself.

Wynonna was too busy focusing on taking deep breaths – _in and out, in and out_ – to make sure her heartbeat wasn’t audible to the world around her, especially Rosita. That was until she felt comforting slim fingers hug her and interlock with her own. The sensation was nice at first, her breath hitched and butterflies took flight in her abdomen. But, a few seconds had passed and the thoughts of that gesture were that Rosita was trying to get close to Wynonna, this caused instant death to the butterflies she had felt and brought forth an intense feeling of nausea and uncertainty. Wynonna to retracted her hand, Rosita lifted her head off the girl and then stared at her in confusion, almost as if Wynonna’s reaction was completely unexpected.

Her own knee-jerk reaction caught herself off guard as she snapped at the older woman, “What the fuck?”

Rosita was utterly puzzled and her eyes inevitably squinted together, “I’m sorry?”

“What are you doing? This was a double date nothing sappy like those two”, once again Wynonna repeated the earlier action and gestured into the dark space in front of her.

“We’re going to go without you!?” Waverly called out, not realising she was sort of interrupting.

“Coming…” Wynonna put more space between herself and Rosita. She started walking backwards but at a quicker pace than she was previously. Her words gripped around her throat which made her stumble over what she wanted to say. “I – I -I gotta go, bye”.

After a few moments of blankly staring at the woman walking away from her and trying to figure out what had happened in those few minutes that had made Wynonna so uncomfortable she let out a lower rasp, “…bye”, she had raised her hand to wave but quickly withdrew it as she realised Wynonna wasn’t even looking.

* * *

**Wynonna’s POV**

Waverly was the first to break the awkward silence as she drove me back to the homestead before going off to Nicole’s.

“As much as I love you Non’s, why are you here with us and not Rosita?”

My fingers were continuously messing with each other as I tried to relieve some anxiety – but maybe I was subconsciously hoping to feel a similar sensation as I did where Ro placed her own 10 minutes prior. I caught a glimpse of Waverly’s sweet face in the interior mirror, I noticed how her eyes were flicking back and forth between me and the road. I know she knows something is wrong, and she knows I know she knows. I still held off a little bit longer before explaining what had happened, because to be honest, I don’t know why I acted that way... _yes, I do. I don’t do relationships or romance. No one gets to know me or gets to be that vulnerable with me – I’m aware it was just a handhold; I promise you I’m not reading anything into it. It’s just hard to be close with someone when you have been told your whole life about how unlovable you are and how it’ll take a unique person – (no) a miracle for someone to ever like – let alone love me._

Nicole reached between the passenger and driver’s seat with a couple of napkins – that Waverly insists on keeping in the car. “Here you go”.

It was dark in the jeep, but I could still make out the sympathetic look Nicole was giving me. I hadn’t even realised that I’d started to involuntarily cry, _but Waverly did – she always notices those small details. I’m guessing she nudged Nicole to pass the napkins back to me._

“Thanks”, I cleared my throat as the words seemed to pull up from the pits of my stomach and dabbed my eyes, cause _apparently_ , I’m trying to salvage whatever makeup was left - it’s not like I had to impress Rosita anymore.

“To answer your question”. I gave the weakest smile to try and make it look like I was okay just to ensure I wouldn’t get bombarded with more questions. “Rosita tried holding my hand…”

Nicole jumps in but still spoke with sympathy, “That’s good isn’t it?”

I watched the way Nicole already had her hand on Waverly’s thigh, it had been there since we all got into the jeep – _why couldn’t I manage something like this?_ Waverly placed her hand on Nicole’s which sorta gave a subtle hint to ‘shut the fuck up’, probably cause I was finally speaking.

We reached a stoplight; the traffic lights dimly illuminated the front of the car, where Haught and Waves were seated. It was a relatively long light, which was fucking annoying cause there was like _no_ traffic, for one it was Purgatory and secondly, it was the evening so even less traffic – _ugh!_ If it were me I would’ve took my chances and skipped the lights, however, this was my baby girl so of course, she followed the rules of the road. To be honest I think she took this time to gather some ideas on what I was going to end up saying next. 

“She tried holding my hand and I pulled away so fast, it was like her touch was equivalent to me holding my hand over steam and it catches you off guard and you pull away like ‘what the fuck was that?’”. Hearing myself say it loud reminded me of how stupid this must sound to this pair, I couldn’t help but laugh at my awkwardness.

Waverly nodded, the way she does…so supportive and understanding. _She’s the best of us you know_ , everyone needs a Waverly. I’d never say this to those love-birds, but they are so well-suited to each other…kind, caring, considerate. Anyway, after she had listened to what I managed to finally explain she glanced into the rear-view mirror once more, “Non’s, did you not explain to her why you reacted the way that you did?”

I had that sinking feeling in my stomach – _fuck_. “No, you – you called and I used that as my excuse to bail”.

I could see how Nicole tried not to react however I still somewhat saw the way her cheeks moved and she gritted her teeth. Now for real, I could tell I fucked up…once again with someone I _actually_ like.

Waverly pulled up to the homestead and swivelled around in her seat – as did Nicole. I was actually feeling grateful for them both because they gave me their best advice.

“I think you should call her”. Nicole spoke first (unexpectedly), Waves and I looked at each other before looking at her, she continued. “If it were me, I’d like to know what was going on because I’d be thinking it was my fault and that I overstepped…then that could possibly do more damage”.

“Told you she was smart”, Waverly smiled at me with an ‘I told you so’ eyebrow raise and then took her girlfriend’s hand into her own.

The idea of calling up Rosita was daunting, it’s not like it’s my first time speaking on the phone to her – we literally talk for hours each night. “But, what do I say…I can’t all be like ‘yeah sorry I reacted like a pussy’ blah, blah, blah”.

The girls sat in front of me, both spoke in a flat tone, “Of course you can”.

Waverly continued, “You have to be honest if you want this to work out”.

“Yeah, she’s still here even after your first interaction was you verbally chastising her”.

Nicole deserved the slap on the arm I gave her – I stand by it. Obviously, Waverly tutted at me before she gave me a ‘sorry’ look for telling Nicole all about the moment Rosita and I met.

“Okay”, I scooped up my belongings next to me. “So, I’ll call her and be honest?”

I pulled on the door’s release and stepped down out of the jeep and ended up accidentally slamming the door to as a gust of wind came out of nowhere.

“Heyyy”, Waverly dragged out her words with a little bit of frustration.

“It wasn’t my fault”, my eyes popped out at her and I nodded to Haughty as more of an acknowledgement of her advice.

“You got this Earp”, Nicole leaned forward slightly to see around Waverly as she blocked some of the view out of the window. 

I gave the couple some sort of wave ‘goodbye’ and unlocked the door of the homestead.

* * *

** *11pm*  **

**Me** : Are you awake? **(11:03pm)**

It’s unusual for Ro not to reply back almost immediately. Her phone was practically glued to her hand, so she’d see a notification and would be on it straight away, so the radio silence was kind of a kick to the teeth but what could I have expected. _Earp, once again you’ve fucked it up. Someone you liked…scratch that, someone who likes you but you had to let your past get in the way. All she wanted was to hold your hand, it’s not like she asked for your hand in marriage._

I pulled out my ‘secret’ stash of whiskey from under my pillow of the undisturbed half of my bed. This was the only place I could have a drink without being judged by Haughty or Waves. They know I drink ‘enough’ and even I know that but I’m still going to work each day, it’s not like I’m not a functioning member of society – I’m okay, right?

I twisted off the black metal cap and threw it in the bin because I know I’m not leaving a drop in this bottle. Bottle in one hand and phone in the other I scrolled through Instagram to stalk some people who I will never speak to again but I wanted to see whether their lives were imploding like mine. I took a long swig from the bottle; the sharpness of the alcohol stung the back of my throat but the familiar burn was pleasant – almost like a warm hug.

 **Ro:** Yeah **(11:29pm)**

_Fine, she sounds pissed…that’s to be expected. I just left her on out first ‘date’._

**Me:** I’m sorry. **(11:31pm)**

 **Ro** : You haven’t got to be sorry, I just wish I knew where I stood with you : ( **(11:31pm)**

_She really hit me with a sad face. Bro…_

I stood up off the bed and put my phone on the chest of drawers. Then changed out of today’s outfit into some sweats, and wiped off the remnants of makeup, mostly because I needed some time to figure out what the hell, I was going to say next.

I grabbed my phone and left the comfort of my _hella_ dark room – Waverly always tells me how it needs more, light in there, she does have a point. Everything is dark wood and pretty much charcoal grey. Feeling sorry for myself I dragged the nearly empty bottle into the kitchen with me to grab a new bottle, to be honest I’ve done well today I hadn’t had a drink since this morning ( _in my coffee – don’t tell Waverly_ ). I opened up my favourite cupboard, only because it holds my whiskey glass and poured a decent amount into it, and swiftly knocked it back along with the dregs of what was left in the first bottle. _Don’t judge me, I’m going to need some liquid courage._

 **Me** : I’m confusing, I know. **(11:40pm)**

 **Me** : Do you want to come round? I’ll be honest with you? **(11:42pm)**

 **Ro** : See you in 20 **(11:42pm)**

***End of POV***

* * *

Rosita sat next to her about an arms-length apart and she was pretty chilled. Laid back in the crook of the couch, her hair… _her gorgeous hair_ laid across the back. Wynonna knew she couldn’t look at her for too long, it would ultimately be her undoing and she was well aware that she’d told Rosita she was going to be honest.

Rosita had clocked the freshly opened bottle of whiskey on the coffee table, along with the solo used glass, but had chosen not to mention anything.

“So, are you going to stare at me the whole time?”

“N-no.”

“Chill out Wynonna, it’s adorable”. Rosita crossed her right leg over her left, her ankle balancing on her knee. She’d brought a water bottle with her and it sat neatly between her legs and partially resting on the couch.

“Uhh shit”, she swiped up the glass that was situated just to her right but before the glass pressed against her lips she asked, “Can I get you anything?” Rosita waved her hand in dismissal of the offer and continued to wait patiently for Wynonna to start the conversation.

Wynonna shakily breathed out, trying to keep herself focused. “Uhm, so I need to explain about earlier. But I’m really nervous, cause I don’t talk to people like ‘this’. I hold in all the shit that runs around in my mind, it’s better for everyone…”

Rosita positioned herself more to face Wynonna directly, her eyes became sympathetic, almost soothing for Wynonna, “It’s not better for you though?” She interlocked her hands together and held them on her right knee.

“It doesn’t matter, I’ve always been told to keep my ‘crazy’ to myself, because if I’m honest I scare people away”, she sighed into her hands and rubbed her eyes to try and hold in impossible tears. She regretted having those few drinks because now she’s feeling more fragile than she’d like to be, but she finally looked to Rosita who had noticed her watery eyes but again decided not to say anything. “I’m broken, I’m a weirdo, I’m selfish, I’m an alcoholic (Wynonna knew this but had never admitted it), I’m practically useless…”

“Hey…” Rosita’s voice was soft and low; it was like a verbal hug and seemed to ease the tension and the nervousness in Wynonna. She could see the way Wynonna’s leg was bouncing continuously in its space and placed a hand on it, just to show her support and understanding. This time the younger woman didn’t recoil from her touch.

“You don’t want to get close to me, I leave when things go to shit…I can’t handle stress, I’m barely keeping the homestead running, bills are coming out of my ears and Waverly…poor Waverly has to cope with me as a sister.” By now Wynonna allowed the tears to flow, it’s as if now she’s pulled the plug on the stress she’s under, everything is coming out and she can’t hold it back.

“Wyn?” She rubbed her thumb over the younger girls knee. “Look at me”.

Wynonna took a few moments to compose herself, her palms were sweaty – she was almost sure they’d leave a print on her grey joggers if she rubbed her palms against them. Her fingers were trembling, her breathing was rapid and she hadn’t taken her eyes off the half-filled whiskey glass that was back in front of her. She finally plucked up the courage and looked at Rosita.

“ _You_ are only 18, and I don’t mean to say that to downplay your ability and the responsibility you have. You’re looking after your sister and a house to ensure Waverly doesn’t suffer. I know I don’t know everything that you’ve been through but…” Rosita moved her hand and rubbed Wynonna’s shoulder as she could see how tears staining her cheeks from relief. “I am willing to listen to whatever you want to share with me, I assure you…I don’t scare easily”. Rosita’s smile was genuine, “Can I sit closer to you, Wyn?” She was now more aware of the contact she makes with Wynonna and her personal space. Though to her surprise, Wynonna tapped the space between them to urge Rosita to close the gap and at this point, their thighs were touching and she placed her hand back onto Wynonna’s thigh to try and comfort her.

“I’m so stupid”, she laughed a little whilst wiping her cheek.

“No, you’re really not. That would require you having a lack of judgement and after what you told me…being honest – that’s never stupid. I am so honoured that you felt able to talk to me, I’m so glad you did”, she instinctively wiped away a rolling tear down Wynonna’s pale cheek that was now tainted with light pink as she had become slightly flushed from crying. Rosita’s thumb spread a leftover particle of mascara across the blank canvas.

“Oops sorry”, she scoffed as she saw a partially pigmented black line going up towards Wynonna’s temple.

“What?”

The older woman looked at her thumb that had a black print pressed into it, “I kinda smudged your mascara”

“Ha, don’t worry…I think you’ve seen me at my worst now”, Wynonna waved her hand up and down to show off her swollen and now burning eyes.

“Nah, you still look pretty hot”, Rosita just smiled and she Wynonna would take the compliment.

Unexpectedly, for the first time in forever Wynonna felt comfortable. Like she wasn’t hiding who she truly is from someone and especially that the someone was still sitting beside her. She lay her head on Rosita’s shoulder to simply enjoy the moment of peacefulness. The homestead’s ambience was calm, the fireplace was burning nicely and the tv was rolling through some commercials on a low volume.

“Do you want anything?”

“Ro, that should be my line, you’re a guest here”, Wynonna’s voice was still thick with emotion. Even though Wynonna couldn’t see her Rosita still lightly shook her head in disbelief because even though this girl had basically bared her soul, she was still thinking about being a host.

“Ro? Hmm that’s a nickname I’ve never had before”.

“Oh, you don’t like it…I can change it?”

Rosita tucked a loose strand of hair that was resting on Wynonna’s long eyelashes behind her ear, “I adore it”

“Good. Uhh, can you stay?”

A small smile tugged at her lips, “If that’s what you want”. She had started to stroke through Wynonna’s long curls which were starting to blend with her own loose Waves, it caused a feeling of serenity to flood Wynonna’s being and she closed her eyes to enjoy a rare moment where she was being taken care of, not her taking care of someone else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, thanks for getting to this point. I was very nervous to post this chapter based on the fact there's a lot of dialogue, plus the introduction of a POV. 
> 
> I'd love some feedback regarding whether there was too much dialogue and if it needs toning down & whether the POV changing is a good idea or not?


	5. Secret drinking (Part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a little bit of angst between the Earp's as old struggles are becoming more and more apparent.

** 16th December 2017 **

A week had passed since Wynonna had poured her heart out to Rosita, and since, she had learned to ‘metaphorically’ unlock the door rather than make Rosita climb the walls. She felt better, but that didn’t prevent her from feeling exposed and vulnerable. Now, Wynonna was able to allow herself to be accepted by Rosita, rather than having her at arm’s length in order to protect herself.

The week had been good; they met up after practice – which earned some raised brows from their respective ‘groups’, then they would retreat to hang out at the homestead and make a b-line to Wynonna’s bedroom; to avoid the eyes of the younger girls. It meant that they were often confined to the bedroom for hours on end, which earnt Wynonna several sex jokes from Waverly and Nicole as soon as the older girl had left.

** *08:33am* **

The walnut coloured wood door pushed open slightly as a slim hand wrapped around the worn-out golden doorknob and the edge of the door. A light shuffle of movement could be heard by the younger Earp which urged her to look down and notice a pile of Wynonna’s discarded clothes that had bunched up behind the door. She slipped through the gap she had made – which couldn’t have gotten wider since the crumpled clothes were now flush against the wall and caught under the door. Waverly sat on the end of Wynonna’s bed, “So, you… Wynonna Earp haven’t had sex with Rosita…”, she crossed her legs whilst her sister woke up and accustomed herself to the sweet voice.

Wynonna rolled onto her left side to try and ignore that Waverly was already asking questions and it wasn’t even 9 am yet, “Is it not too early for this conversation?” she reached out for the side table and tapped her phone’s screen to see whether she’d missed any texts from Rosita whilst she had been asleep. Her notifications were completely clear and her hopes of seeing ‘Ro’ on the screen faded away.

“Who are you and _what_ have you done with my sister?” Waverly slapped Wynonna’s bum on top of the covers. “When has it ever been too early for you to talk about sex?”

Wynonna was still groggy but she was still able to string a coherent thought together, “This is different, it’s not just about sex”.

Waverly nodded and held her mouth tightly shut.

“Waverly Earp has nothing to say?” Wynonna pushed herself up onto her elbows to question her sister perched on the bed, with two French braids trailing down her back. She continued to sit herself up and rest her back against the headboard. “Anyway, you’re up and ready early. How come?”.

She crawled up Wynonna’s bed, got under the covers, and put her back against the headboard. Waverly gave the older girl a light slap on the arm in the hope to jog her memory, “Duh, Wyn. You said we’re going tree shopping today?”

 _Shit_ – “Yeah I did say that didn’t I?” She tried to hide that she had completely forgotten about the plans she had with the girls. “What time did you want to be out then?” Wynonna smoothed her baby hairs back into her falling out messy bun that had come unraveled during her sleep.

Waverly leaned into Wynonna and laid her head on her shoulder, “Well, I was hoping to make a day of it. You, Nics and I. The first year we all get to prepare and decorate for Christmas…together”. The thought of their first Christmas together, after both Earp’s had missed out on so many, made Waverly giddy, her grin couldn’t be contained and a little squeal of excitement slipped from her lips. Wynonna responded by placing her hand across her body and onto Waverly’s mouth since it was way too early for her to be hearing such high-pitched sounds.

“Oh, yeah…we can do that. Give me at least 30, I’ll be ready and I’m driving ‘cause I can get Red to help tie the tree down on the bed of the truck”. Wynonna kicked her feet out from under the blankets, “Fuck me it’s cold”, she turned back to Waverly who had shuffled down in the bed to shield herself from the cold. “Is the fire not on?”

“We just came downstairs, sorry…but the coffee is still hot so hurry up”, Waverly raised her eyebrows as she knew the promise of coffee would spur Wynonna on to get ready a little faster.

The darker haired woman left her bedroom and made her way upstairs for a shower. It gave Waverly the chance to investigate the hard lump that was digging into her shoulder. She pulled the blankets off of her and braced her now toasty body for the cold air to rest upon it. She sat back onto her heels and lifted the pillow she was previously laying on then placed it off to the side.

“Really?”, she tilted the ¾ full bottle side to side as she tried to understand where this other bottle had come from. She knew she hadn’t seen Wynonna come back home with the ‘unsuspecting’ brown paper bags in a while, but in the same breath Waverly realised she had been spending more time with Nicole and going to the rink in her own car. Instead she had hoped that because Wynonna had been either at work, practice or with Rosita it would’ve given her less chance to pop a cap on a bottle. To her disappointment it just meant Wynonna had gotten better at sneaking a drink. Though she was upset her sister, what made it worse was that Wynonna was hiding her struggles. Waverly wasn’t stupid, she knew full well Wynonna wasn’t going to divulge information of all her daily struggles to a 16-year-old, even if that 16-year-old was her sister. She felt powerless, she craved the sisterly relationship to be able to have regular heart to heart’s / catch-up’s to understand how each of them were doing.

The young Earp came to the conclusion she wasn’t going to confront her sister about the bottle because she didn’t want an argument before they had to spend a full day together or for there to be an awkward atmosphere especially for Nicole. She placed the bottle onto the bedside table and left the room for the kitchen.

Wynonna slid the lock across on the bathroom door and pulled her arms out of her long sleeved, stained t-shirt. There was a whole in the neck area and one under the left armpit, Waverly had tried to throw it away several times whenever she clapped eyes on it in the washing basket – Wynonna had literally pulled it from the trash and threw it into the washing machine, at this point it was haunting Waverly and she was sure Wynonna would wear it purely to get under her skin.

She kicked off her shorts and dropped her shirt in a pile next to the sink cabinet. Wynonna turned on the shower and quickly retracted her arm to ensure she missed the imminent freezing cold jet of water that always comes out first before it gets a chance to warm up. The shower water pelted off the bottom of the tub and the sound of water dancing across the surface was drowned out with the beginning of ‘Sober – Lorde’. Wynonna rolled her eyes at the irony that ‘this’ was the song to start playing when she pressed shuffle. She pulled back the shower curtain and was ready to get in as she shook her hair loose from the bun it was in, yet she got side-tracked when her phone vibrated on the cabinet and ‘Ro’ lit up the screen. Her eyes glistened with happiness and she spun around on the one heel and scooped up her phone.

 **Ro** : Morning you :*

 **Wynonna** : You’re lucky Waverly woke me up, else I wouldn’t have answered for another couple of hours

 **Ro** : I’ll make a mental note to thank her the next time I see her. What you got planned for today?

 **Wynonna** : Apparently, I told Waverly we were going tree shopping today? I don’t recall this plan; I think she’s cornered me into this. But we’ll be going with Red, so don’t worry I’ll be third-wheeling my sister and (basically) only friend.

 **Ro** : Hey!!! Am I not a friend?

 **Wynonna** : More of a ‘friend’ friend <3 What have you got planned?

 **Ro** : Just work :( But I finish early :) But then I have practice :(

 **Wynonna** : You’re going through the motions I see :D But that means I can’t see you today?

 **Ro** : Ikr, but we’ll fall asleep on facetime tonight since we missed last night’s.

 **Wynonna** : Looking forward to it, gotta go, shower’s running can’t be late

 **Ro** : <33333

* * *

** *10:10am* **

The trio made a pit stop for some breakfast. Wynonna made Nicole ride in passenger because she knew Nicole wouldn’t put on some cheesy music aka something Waverly would love. Maybe the other reason was that she was actually starting to see Nicole as less like Waverly’s girlfriend but more like her friend too. Both girls started to unwrap their breakfast, whilst Wynonna took the occasional bite of her pancakes that dangerously rested between her knees on the grey material of the seat. Wynonna had no shame in singing along to the radio with her mouth crammed full of pancakes, whilst the odd crumb flew out and landed on the dashboard.

Waverly spoke up from the back, in between her small bites of waffle, “This isn’t very attractive you know?’

Nicole’s eyes were fixated on the state of all that is Wynonna Earp. Her eyes watched as half-eaten pancake dropped into Wynonna’s lap and noticed the contrast of the gold against the black dash. She grimaced, “Yeah this is what not to do in front of Rosita since you’re trying to impress her”. She handed Wynonna a napkin even though she knew it wouldn’t do much.

“Well, luckily Rosita isn’t here then?”, she returned the look to the redhead and snatched up the last half of the pancake and in an animalistic way took a purposeful bite to prove her point. Nicole turned slightly in her seat as the seatbelt restrained her and looked to Waverly and shared a ‘look’.

The blue and white truck pulled up to the Christmas tree farm and out hopped the younger girls first, Wynonna held back in the vehicle to check herself in the rear-view mirror. She pulled out her red pompom bobble hat that was tucked into the side of the driver’s door and slipped it over her low ponytail. “Oh god, I look like a toddler”, she rolled her eyes and wiped some remaining crumbs that had stuck to her Chapstick covered lips.

It was Waverly’s idea for the three girls to have matching pompom hats, but both Wynonna and Nicole agreed that they were choosing different colours. They ended up looking like the power puff girls, Nicole got forest green with a black pompom (which matched Wynonna’s) and Waverly chose a powder blue topped off with a white fluffy pompom. Wynonna pulled out her phone and snapped a quick selfie to Rosita with her tongue sticking out.

 **Wynonna** : Look at the state of this contraption ^^

 **Wynonna** : Also it’s cold af, I will literally drag Waverly if I have to. I’m not risking hyperthermia

 **Ro** : 1) It’s actually hypothermia, hyperthermia is when you’re hot but never mind, 2) I’ll warm you up, dw ;)

Nicole interrupted the flow of texts between the two women as she knocked on the window. “C’mon!” and jerked her head at Waverly who was already speaking to the man that was selling the trees.

“What height are you looking for? I’m sure for you lovely ladies…” the man’s eyes wandered up and down Waverly which made her feel uneasy. “Nothing too tall or cumbersome since you haven’t brought a man with you”. The man was ignorant and had no remorse in what he had said.

Wynonna barely caught the last of what he had said but she had heard enough, she gave a warning push to his shoulder. “HEY!” and points her finger directly in his face, “That’s my little sister, she’s 16 so fucking back off before I break your di – ”

Nicole grabbed the top if Wynonna’s arm to stop her in her tracks but Wynonna shook out of it easily, “Wynonna”, Nicole spat out her name to grab her attention. “Leave it, he got the message”.

She stepped back from the man who looked to be in his mid-20’s, “When we’re ready, I’ll ask for your help”, she cut her eyes at him and she started to walk through the section where the trees were ranging between 5ft – 6ft.

The redhead slinked next to Wynonna and cleared her throat to catch her attention, “Waves has gone to get us hot cocoa. She said she’ll find us, if she can’t she’ll call…don’t worry”. One side of Nicole’s face lifted as she gave a small smile of reassurance.

“Right! Red, do you fancy dragging in a 6-footer with me?”

The pair trudged through the thick layer of untouched snow since they were the first customers on sight, some of the top layers seemed to float as the wind picked up every now and again.

“I’m, uhh up for the challenge. First Christmas altogether and all… gotta be special”. Wynonna tapped Nicole on the back as she agreed with her conclusion and they both looked either side of the aisle of trees.

“What about this?”, Wynonna stood next to one that was kind of mushed together with the neighbouring trees. Nicole shakes her said in response and instead points to one, a few steps ahead of her.

“Definitely not, look”, Wynonna waved her glove covered hands and smacked the snow off the straggly branches. “It looks a bit wimpy. We want a tree with character”.

“You found anything yet?” Waverly called out from behind the couple as she had three disposable cups full of hot chocolate clutched in both hands, she was taking it easy to make sure she didn’t drop them or start to spill some all over her cream mittens.

Nicole turned back to take two drinks off of her and passed one to Wynonna. “Not yet, maybe you can see one we’ve over-looked”.

“SON OF A BITCH!” Wynonna held her lips with a tear in her eye. “Fuck!”

“Sorry, it’s hot”, Waverly gritted her teeth as Wynonna’s eyes widened enough to say ‘no shit sherlock’.

Nicole stifled her laugh and held Waverly’s free hand with her own. “We’ve got up to here”.

The trio walked around for another 10 minutes or so.

“This one! It’s perfect”. The young Earp stopped in front of a tree that was no longer part of the 5ft-6ft category.

“Waves, it’s 7ft!?”, Nicole quirked an eyebrow at her girlfriend.

“Haught, if it’s perfect – we’re getting it”. Wynonna leaned into Nicole’s ear, “Don’t you want to get back into the warm?” Nicole didn’t need to answer Wynonna and instead went to grab the guy from earlier.

Both Wynonna and Nicole took turns throwing the rope over the ‘fuck-off’ sized tree – as Wynonna kept referring to it as – and tied it to the bed of the truck. Waverly had offered to help but she could barely see above the truck, let alone throw over the rope. Instead, she had called shotgun and hopped into the passenger seat and plugged in the AUX cord. Since all the windows were up, Wynonna could just make out the song ‘Lip Gloss – Lil Mama’. Wynonna walked around the back of the truck to see whether Nicole could hear it too and by the look on her face, she knew the answer was yes.

“Ohh, it’s going to be a fun 30 minutes back to Purgatory”, Nicole exuded sarcasm just as her tongue ran across her teeth as she shook her head.

“She’s your girlfriend!”

“She’s your sister!”

“Touché”, Wynonna winked at Nicole before she disappeared over the other side of the vehicle and pulled out her car keys.

* * *

** *3pm* **

****

“Problem”. Waverly bounced onto the driveway as she saw both her sister and her girlfriend drag the tree off the truck. Using her usual ‘bad news’ voice, “It’s not gonna fit, just measured and we need like half a foot off it”. Her voice got quieter as she saw their faces drop with the realisation.

Wynonna dropped her part of the tree which made Nicole fall to the floor with the weight of most of the tree on her end, “You what?”

With a few groans and curse words, Nicole jumped in, “Told you we should’ve stuck with the 6-footer, at most”.

Wynonna spoke through gritted teeth “Not the time for I told you so, Haughty”.

Wynonna swiped her hat off her head and tucked it into her coat pocket, then ran her hands through her roots to relieve some stress. “Fine, where’s the axe. Haught’s gonna have to roleplay being a lumberjack for you”.

“What?”, Nicole’s top lip raised and her eyebrows dropped as she was caught off guard with Wynonna’s insinuation.

The eldest girl left for her room to put her phone on charge. Though as soon as she entered the room, she noticed her bottle of whiskey on the side table instead of where she had left it, under her pillow. Instantly she knew it could’ve only been Waverly who found it as she was the last in the room. A flash of heat took over her body and she let herself fall onto her bed, the wave of embarrassment from being caught secretly drinking by her younger sister washed over her from top to bottom. Once again, the notion of her being a disappointment nestled in the back of her mind. Wynonna eyed the bottle that seemed to be taunting her, picked it up and ran her pointer finger around the rim of the metal lid. She tapped her nails against it to make a quiet metallic sound. She battled with her inner demons on whether or not to crack it open and just down whatever was left.

 _Well, she’s already found it; she knows it’s in here and that I’m inevitably going to drink whether it’s sooner or later? Might as well live up to being a disappointment like I always have._ She laughs to herself, almost hysterical with her own thoughts. _You can’t change Wynonna Earp, I’m a goddamn Earp…alcoholism is in my blood, it’s basically oxygen at this point. It’s one thing daddy gave me, instead of throwing fists like he did at mama, he gave me alcohol problems. ‘Thanks daddy’._

She spun off the cap and raised the bottle up to the sky, almost like a ‘cheers’ to her father. Wynonna wrapped her now cold, chapped lips around the bottle, closed her eyes and took a long drink. Earp had succumbed to the familiar burn and retracted the bottle from her mouth, still with her eyes closed.

Waverly flung open Wynonna’s door, which allowed a stream of light to fill the dingy room and showcased her sister slumped on the bed with her elbows resting on her knees and the bottle being loosely gripped by two fingers.

“Really? You can’t just have one day without going back to this?”, she clasped her hands together around her own neck.

Wynonna couldn’t bear to look at her sister, “Shut up Waves”

“I mean, we were having a good day. You were out of the house; we sang karaoke on the way back. You seemed happy?”

“Waverly…”

“But here you are, drinking, alone in your room. It’s pathetic Wyn-”. Waverly continued rambling, there were probably some valid points amongst the emotions she had flying out of her mouth but Wynonna wasn’t present for the speech.

Instead, she threw the bottle down onto the ground, glass, and alcohol sprawled across the wooden floorboards. She shot up from the bed and pinned Waverly into the corner of the room.

“FUCKING SHUT YOUR MOUTH! You know nothing, NOTHING! You’re delusional to think I’m anything better than – than – than, this!”.

Her usual peaceful blue eyes became a tidal wave of anger, almost identical to what you’d imagine a storm to be like when out at sea. Waverly tried to move from Wynonna but couldn’t get any further away and instead shouted for Nicole.

“Waverly!?” Nicole runs into the room and sees her girlfriend backed into a corner with her sister hunched over her. Wynonna was seething, her fists were shaking as the adrenaline raced through her body. The redhead placed both hands on the older Earp’s shoulders and pulled her away from Waverly, she stood in between both of them.

Soft sobs could be heard from behind Nicole but she hadn’t registered them yet as she was too busy facing off to Wynonna.

“What the fuck Wynonna?”, she got right into her face with the hope her height became somewhat intimidating to get her to back down or at least calm down. Waverly was self-soothing behind the chaos; she wrapped her arms around herself and allowed her tears to fall into her scarf.

The eldest woman stepped back from the redhead, “I don’t need shit from you too”, she snatched up her phone which causes the charger to pop out and storms out on foot and heads to her place of work.

* * *

Wynonna had been sat in the pub for the past 3 hours, recounting the events that had taken place at the homestead. However, the main thing that kept coming back to her was hearing Waverly’s voice scream out in fear, all because of her. That’s the last thing she wanted for her sister, she was meant to keep her safe and look out for her. Wynonna’s only reason for pulling herself together and getting a job was to keep Waverly out of the system and for her not to experience any emotional abuse or abuse full stop. Yet here she was, in her own home with her sister and she was still in harm’s way.

 _Fuck._ She thought to herself as she stretched her thumb across her palm and stroked the abrasions that her nails had left behind from when she had squeezed her hands shut. A tear slipped from her left eye, which she flicked away quickly before any of the punters noticed it _. My baby sister was scared, no, she looked absolutely fucking terrified of me._ The eldest Earp rubbed her brow bone to relieve the mental images of Waverly cowering from her.

“Alright darlin’?”

Doc sat opposite her and noticed the drying tear under her eye. “What’s happened lil’ lady, has anyone given you trouble?”

Wynona scoffed, “Ahh, more like I’m the trouble”. She refused to look up from her hands as she continued to ring them together. “Doc, I appreciate you checking in. But, I’m not ready to talk about this yet”.

Doc reluctantly stood up from his stool and placed a compassionate hand on the woman’s back, “See you tomorrow then Wynonna”.


	6. Secret drinking (part 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wynonna gets some tough love and Rosita gets roughed up.  
> Turns out everyone has their own struggles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Drowning your demons playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2QliA7qcg6bEtrBL3R8rhT?si=3PfkjN5HS2OC1mQSvHy0lw)

** *7pm* **

Rosita had been on the ice for the best part of an hour and she had already sensed some issues between her and the rest of the hockey players. They were hostile. Of course, she was still the newest member of the team – so that made her a target, however, she was being spotted more and more frequently with Wynonna. The team had started to question where her loyalty lies, with them or with the figure skaters.

Valdez had been the main culprit who ensured that the whole team knew that Rosita was ‘literally’ batting for the other team.

Rosita had had enough; she was being passed off at every opportunity she had to obtain the puck and especially as the centre it was important for her and the team to be on civil terms in order to ensure the game went smoothly and they’d play to the best of their ability. Eventually, a teammate passed the biscuit to Rosita, she tackled the offence who were coming in hot and was able to employ her quick thinking and skated past the other centre who happened to be one of Valdez’s ‘heavy’s’. Rosita was playing to her usual standard; she was doing well. Her strategies panned out until a brutal attack impacted Rosita’s left hip, she stumbled off balance and smacked into the safety glass. The clear, reinforced glass ricocheted against its metal stabilisers. The sound of her skates which cut away several layers of ice pierced the ears of the rest of the team and drew the attention of the coach.

She dug her skates into the ice.

“Penalty Jones! Get to the box! You’re off for the rest of practice”, Coach Randle’s voice rumbled across the ice as he made his way over to scold Jones and to check on Rosita. “What happened, are you okay?” he held his significantly bigger hand out to her, she placed one hand in his and the other hand on her right knee as she got up.

“I’m okay, coach”, the woman dusted off her uniform with the disturbed ice shards. “Just a bit winded, can I take 5?”. Rosita wasn’t necessarily asking permission; it was more of a statement.

“You’re done for today. Rest up, ice your shoulder”, coach Randle knocked his knuckles against her helmet. 

She reached under her chin for her helmet strap and unclipped it, and pulled out her black gum shield whilst skating off the ice. The eyes and snickers of her fellow teammates followed her off the ice as she pulled down the plastic red seat, far enough away from Jones but not far enough that she wouldn’t be able to hear her.

She spoke first in a low voice that would easily be lost by the sound of the other blades making contact with the ice. “Valdez put you up to this?”. Rosita didn’t even look in her direction, she took a sip from her water bottle and re-tied her hair into a ponytail. Jones stayed quiet, her only response was to click her tongue against the roof of her mouth.

“I’m fucking speaking to you…” this time spite tarnished her words which earned her a glance from some of the team that wasn’t on the ice.

“Someone has to teach you, you’re one of _us_. Not a damn ‘fairy’”, she air quoted the last word.

“Like I said, is this Valdez’s doing?”, by now Rosita had already kicked off her skates and started to make her way over to the blonde. She planted her feet a hip-width apart and stood directly in front of Jones. The other girl felt over-powered as she was the only one still seated, so in response, she got up but was met by Rosita’s smaller stature making contact with her chest as she refused to back down. Jones reacted the only way she knew how.

Rosita had been in enough fights whilst growing up, especially since she was the outcast. The brunette blocked the next few punches, she locked on to Jones’ disadvantage which was that her blonde waves were loose, Rosita grabbed a fistful of hair and yanked her head down and pushed all her weight onto the blonde which pinned her to the floor. Rosita foamed at the mouth, “Tell Valdez, I talk to who the **fuck** I like- ”.

She was cut off as she got dragged off the girl by thin limbs wrapped around her waist. Big barrel curls fell across Rosita’s face which weren’t her own and the familiar scent of the cheap whiskey she had shared that one night sat at the back of her throat.

“Wynonna, the fuck?”

The younger woman had her hand firmly wrapped around the tanned woman’s forearm to hold her in place and prevent her from going in for round 2. Wynonna waved to the coach to say that she had it under control and continued to grab Rosita’s skates and headed towards the changing room so the older woman could collect the rest of her belongings.

It had been no more than 10 minutes; Wynonna was straddled on one of the wooden benches with her phone resting on her thigh. She scrolled through the notifications from Waverly, Nicole and Doc. Doc’s message simply read that Waverly’s gone to Nicole’s for a few days. She rolled her eyes as she couldn’t face the abundance of texts that were waiting to be read, plus she had to deal with whatever went down here.

Finally, Rosita heaved the door open with her gym bag on her shoulder. Her red doc’s set the whole outfit off, they matched well with the red chequered flannel tied at her waist which covered her mid-riff. The look was completed with an unlit cigarette loosely balanced between her lips which made her talking a little muffled.

“Let’s go”.

The younger woman stood up with the bench between her legs and raised the left leg over the obstacle and followed Rosita to her motorbike. “You gonna tell me what that…” she looked back over her shoulder at the ice rink’s doors “was in there? Or am I meant to mind my own business?”

“The latter would be great” Rosita deadpanned.

“You know me by now, I don’t mind my business. Especially if it involves you getting into fights. Was it at least worth it?”

Rosita didn’t answer as she continued to rest the bag across her body and picked up her helmet.

“Ro?”, Wynonna slapped the back of Rosita’s biker jacket which provoked her.

She spun around and huffed when she realised Wynonna wasn’t going to give up, “It was about you”. She placed her hands on her hips and rocked back and forth from her heels to toes.

“It was about me…me, why me?”, Wynonna’s voice continued to heighten as she became more and more unsure.

“They know we’re spending ‘too much’ time together”

Wynonna scoffed as she shrugged on her leather jacket. “Pfft, we’ve barely gotten started. They’re gonna be really pissed”. She was casually joking about the whole situation which put Rosita on edge, as Wynonna wasn’t taking this seriously.

“Wyn. I came here, to Purgatory, to be me…and – and now, they are making a sport I really love, a chore, ‘cause – because of who I hang around with in my spare time”. She placed her helmet down on the back of the bike.

Wynonna flung her head back and placed her lips between her teeth, Rosita saw how her teeth dented her cushioned lips. “Cause of me…” Her eyebrows raised and fell just as quickly. “So, what…it’s me or hockey, yeah?”. Wynonna took a step back; she’d barely given Rosita room to speak.

“Wynonna, listen to me”. Rosita tried to raise her right arm to stop Wynonna from walking away but voted against it as she winced in pain as it had started to bruise.

The sound of Rosita’s pain, emotionally pained Wynonna and she immediately stopped in her path, “Wait, are you okay?”

The older woman tilted her head as she asked, “Do you actually want to know what happened?”

The younger woman sat on the edge of the curb and Rosita perched next to her, who then hashed out all the details of what happened, including when Valdez had sat next to her when Wynonna was on the ice, all the way up to the most recent event of Wynonna pulling her off Jones. Throughout the conversation, Rosita was met with nods and a calming hand being rested on the small of her back.

“I’m sorry”. Wynonna sounded guilty; she was pissed at herself for assuming the worst-case scenario before she thought about hearing her out.

Rosita shrugged and dismissed whatever Wynonna had said and lit up the cigarette that she had been rolling between her fingers the whole time. She took a drag and relished the moment to refuel her nicotine craving, “You smell of alcohol, isn’t it a bit early?”, she rocked from right to left to nudge Wynonna but as she looked at her she knew she’d hit a nerve. Before pressing for information, Rosita placed the cigarette between Wynonna’s lips.

Wynonna’s fingers sat on either side of the cigarette after her drag and exhaled whilst continuing to stare at the smoke expelling into the air.

“I’ve made such a mess of things Ro”. Wynonna replaced her explanation for the cigarette.

Rosita realised Wynonna needed the full Marlboro right now and instead pulled out the last one from the pack that resided in her jacket’s inner pocket. As she clicked her lighter, she searched her mind for the most appropriate response.

“Do you want to share what happened?”

“Uhm, not right now. Is that okay? I know I kinda forced you to tell me…”, Wynonna took a sharp inhale of the crisp air around her and snubbed out the butt of the cigarette.

“I’m fine with whatever you’re wanting to / not wanting to share”, Rosita finished her cigarette whilst her head rested against Wynonna’s shoulder.

* * *

Wynonna closed the door to the homestead and stomped off the engrained snow in the soles of her boots and slipped them off at the door. Rosita had already plonked herself down on the couch and picked up the remote to turn on the tv.

In the corner of the room, between the living room and the kitchen, the ‘newly sized’ tree greeted Wynonna, fully decorated except for the angel topper. Waverly had made a big deal about the girls being together for the angel placement, it made Wynonna’s heart leap for a second that she still crossed her sister’s mind even after what she had done. As Wynonna flicked on the kitchen’s light switch, her eyes caught the golden glisten of the tinsel hanging off the ends of the branches. A weak, guilty smile tugged at her mouth but she was mostly reminded how once again she wasn’t there to help.

 _Goddamn Earp_ , she thought to herself as she grabbed a bag of pea’s out of the freezer and pulled a tea towel out of the drawer. Wynonna jerked her knee to shut the freezer door and walked over to Rosita who had her feet up on the couch. “One bag of frozen peas for the lady”, she sarcastically bowed and held out her hand, waiting for Rosita to take the bag which she had done. She kicked down her legs and waited for Wynonna to sit down.

“What’d you want on?”, Rosita asked as she removed her tank top which exposed her deep green bra, and placed the bag of peas on her shoulder. Wynonna’s eyes practically popped out of her head but she tried not to gawk at the woman so she wouldn’t feel uncomfortable.

Earp picked up the other’s legs and placed them across her lap, “Babe…” both women took a second to register what came out Wynonna’s mouth but neither of them corrected it. “That looks nasty”, she peered around to get a better look. “How bad does it hurt?”

“Scale of 1-10, 11?”, Wynonna laughed at Rosita’s response and quickly tapped her right shin which was crossed over her left.

“Ayy, don’t give me more bruises”. Rosita warned and raised her eyebrows at the woman staring back at her.

“Pass the remote”, she held her hand out. “There’s already a DVD in, I was meant to watch it with Waves and Haught…but not anymore due to no fault of my own”.

Rosita narrowed her eyes as she hadn’t completely understood what had gone on this afternoon, but all she knew was that Wynonna was struggling. She let her eyes linger a little longer as she watched the way she smiled when the opening scene of ‘Home Alone’ came onto the screen. _She’s adorable_ , the thought passed through her mind – it didn’t faze her because Rosita knew from the moment, she met Wynonna, nothing would be the same again.

The film had ended a few minutes prior but Wynonna didn’t want to disturb Rosita, who had fell asleep an hour into the film. Wynonna didn’t take it personally; she’d rather let her sleep off the pain. On the bright side, every now and again she stole some glances at the sleeping woman – something that she wouldn’t have been able to do if she was awake. _She’s beautiful_.

Wynonna picked up the remote that she had balanced on the arm of the couch and turned off the tv which significantly darkened the room, there was a shred of light coming in from the kitchen that illuminated the edges of the tree. She gently moved Rosita’s legs to ensure she wouldn’t wake her and headed into the kitchen then b-lined for her ‘favourite’ cupboard. As she hooked her fingers around the handle she was greeted by a couple of empty bottles of alcohol. One had a note on it, written with ‘Wynonna’ on the front in Waverly’s handwriting, it said:

_Wynonna, you hurt me, disappoint me, anger me…but you also love me, make me happy, and care for me._

_The latter is the most important, we’re the Earp sisters. You’re MY sister, you look out for me so please let me let us lookout for you?_

_Even when I’m not at home, I am always here for you. Nicole and I emptied out your alcohol, I’m not sorry. You’re pissed off at me, but it’s better in the long run. I know you’re probably about to go and get some from the shop but at least you’ll hurt your pockets only half as much as seeing you struggle, hurts me._

_I’ll be back by the 20 th, we’ll finish the decorating then._

_All my love and light, babygirl x_

The kitchen cupboard was left wide open and the empty bottle rested in the middle of the kitchen table where Wynonna sat behind it. Tears dropped from her eyes onto the paper which made the ink start to bleed. She dropped the note onto the wooden surface and rested her head in her hands, her palms pressed into her eyes until she was seeing stars. A light hand placement could be felt on the top of her back, she didn’t startle – maybe subconsciously she had heard Rosita moving off the couch.

Rosita didn’t need to say anything, instead, she stood behind and bent over to reach Wynonna and wrapped both arms across the top of her chest, and rested her head on Wynonna’s head. To her surprise, Wynonna’s sobs had gotten louder, even though they were much more muffled. She rocked in place side to side which made Wynonna’s body move slightly, in unison with herself.

The seated woman spoke after a few quiet minutes, “I need help…”


	7. A trip down memory lane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wynonna bites the bullet and opens up to Rosita about her family dynamics and childhood. Rosita starts to understand the reasoning behind the way Wynonna acts.  
> There's some domestic Wynsita fluff.
> 
> Rosita sheds some light on Wynonna to Waverly.  
> And both women finally start to act on their feelings for each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has a trigger warning for domestic abuse / childhood abuse. It's not spoken about in detail, but there will be a prior warning before the section explicitly talks about it. 
> 
> Playlists associated with this fic:  
> [ Drowning your demons playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2QliA7qcg6bEtrBL3R8rhT?si=3PfkjN5HS2OC1mQSvHy0lw)  
> [ Wynonna's Playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3Jk2K31UYXNGGsN4RzsshF?si=ot_Cds85SCKiXiunAd6e6Q)  
> [ Waverly's Playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4SDdXZq61xrtHyMcAvJ5l6?si=vCRP14tOTya2FQp7uonkEw)

** 17th December 2017 **

The warmth of the winter sun laid across Rosita’s cheek which caused her to slowly drift out of her sleep state. The first thing that came through to her was a familiar scent of coconuts, it wasn’t too over-powering; the remnants of Wynonna’s shampoo was clearly wearing off. She tilted her head down and slightly to her left to see Wynonna still wrapped around her torso, the same way as they had fallen asleep. A comforting smile took residence on Rosita’s face and she took a moment to appreciate the way Wynonna perfectly slotted into her embrace, she even enjoyed the way her arm; under the sleeping woman was numb, the way her fingers felt like electric currents as her blood flow became compromised, she didn’t care though – this was the one moment she truly believed Wynonna was at ease.

Rosita used her free arm to search under the duvet and the few blankets that were sprawled over the two of them, her fingers finally came into contact with a glossy screen and she pulled the object up out from under the covers and clicked the side button. _The screen read:_

**_*9:40am*_ **

_Fair enough, it was a long night._ She reasoned with herself as she was used to being a morning person; always being up and out of her bed by 8:30am at the latest. Rosita took this time ‘alone’ to answer any missed messages.

**_*Unread – Mia (4 notifications)*_ **

Rosita didn’t think anything of it as if it were an emergency, she would’ve called ** _._** _3-1-1-0,_ she tapped in her passcode and read through her texts.

 **Mia** : R, have you got any plans? _(delivered 11pm)_

 **Mia** : If you don’t, let me know. Want a night in with a film and wine :p _(11:02pm)_

 **Mia** : When are you not on your phone? aNSweR meeee! ( _11:46pm_ )

 **Mia** : Ugh, your loss. See you Monday x (12:15am)

 **Rosita** : Morning!

 **Mia** : Ohh, you’re alive?

 **Rosita** : Ha ha!

 **Mia** : What were you up to?

 **Rosita** : Nothing…but I’m in Wynonna’s bed :)

 **Mia** : You horn-dog! Did you hit it?

 **Rosita** : MIA!!!

 **Rosita** : It’s not like that. She surprised me after practice – pretty great surprise!

 **Mia** : Hmmm, so you two are in bed – cuddling? I think you need to take things further, like on a date, without her sister and her sister's girlfriend.

 **Rosita** : Noted. I want something nice for her though, is dinner okay? Do you have any good recommendations?

The flow of texts exchanged between the friends came to an abrupt end as Wynonna started to stir next to Rosita. A gentle exhale through Wynonna’s nose, warmed the area above Rosita’s breast. Surprisingly her arms didn’t loosen from Rosita’s body, instead, her grip got more purposeful and her whole body wiggled closer to the other woman, her first words pricked at the back of her mouth.

“Hey”, the back end of the word blended seamlessly with a yawn Wynonna didn’t try to hide.

Wynonna’s morning voice had become one of Rosita’s favourite sounds – she’d hear it every other day when they’d wake up on facetime to each other. The way her voice was much hoarser; Wynonna explained it away as having a dry mouth. Rosita would tease her by saying, ‘Yeah, cause you sleep with your mouth wide open…drooling all over the pillow’.

“Morning”, Rosita wedged her phone under her hip and focused her attention on Wynonna and placed her hand that was once holding her phone on the pale woman’s left arm, and stroked the tips of her fingers across her forearm. “Did you sleep well?”

Wynonna readjusted her head and nuzzled the top of it into the crook of Rosita’s neck. Though the other woman’s body shivered slightly as the brunette’s fly-aways tickled her face, she refused to move since this was Wynonna starting to show some intimacy towards her. They spent no more than 10 minutes cuddling in a comfortable silence until Wynonna sat up crossed-legged on the bed looking at Rosita.

Her eyes trailed to watch as the younger woman – who was still wearing the tank top from last night and some maroon sweatpants, was perfectly outlined by the orange sunlight. Rosita copied the same movements and sat opposite her. She looked into Wynonna’s eyes for the first time since they had woken up and at this moment, she was sure they have never looked so crisp. Maybe it was the way the tone of the orange complemented the cool waters of the blue?

The tanned woman spoke up first and tilted her head, “You look beautiful”.

“Pfft, I’ve just woken up”. Wynonna sarcastically rolled her eyes and started to re-do her ponytail. “You’ve got some low expectations if ‘this’ is beauty”.

**(Trigger warning)**

Rosita raised her hand with the idea to slap her on the knee to scold her for putting herself down, however when she saw Wynonna shrink into herself whilst her hand was in the air, she quickly withdrew it.

A weak, nervous smile sat on Wynonna’s face; her bottom lip was embraced between her teeth.

“Wyn, I’d never – I’d never hurt you”. Rosita knew this was a heavy topic to talk about first thing in the morning but her curiosity got the better of her before she could even stop the question, it slipped out. “Did someone hurt you?”

The other woman seemed to not even be in the room, let alone present for the conversation. Instead she dragged herself off the bed and grabbed a towel out of her drawer for Rosita, placed it on the end of the bed and unhooked her own off the back of her bedroom door.

“We’ll talk later”. Her head quirked to the side and she gave a reassuring smile to Rosita, as if to say ‘it wasn’t her fault and that she’s okay’. “I’m going to hop in the shower, I’ll be down in a bit. Put some coffee on?”

**(Trigger warning end)**

The woman who was still sat on the bed simply nodded to acknowledge she had heard Wynonna’s request. She hooked her toes around the long-sleeve of her over-sized flannel that was discarded next to the bed and slipped it on to cover herself up.

The sound of damp feet against the bare floorboards added to the background noise as Wynonna plodded down the stairs. Rosita caught a glimpse of the woman with a light pink towel wrapped around her body, and her long wet partially clung onto the doorway as Wynonna whipped it around on one shoulder as she disappeared into her room. Her attention was brought back to her menial task when the oil in the frying pan had started to spit at Rosita. She silently cursed the pan and cracked open two eggs and popped some bread into the toaster.

Rosita peered into a few cupboards and overlooked ‘Wynonna’s favourite’ until she found the stack of plates, she grabbed two and set them down on the counter. Turned out the gas flame under the eggs and rustled through the cutlery draw to find the spatula. In the same movement the toast bounced up out of the toaster and the smell of breakfast filled the room and floated into the rest of the house.

“Oooh, what’s cookin’ good lookin’?”, Wynonna was fully dressed now – ripped, dark-blue jeans and a ‘very’ cropped crop top showed off the purple bralette she was sporting. Her hair was still wet but was drier than what it previously had been when Rosita saw her.

Rosita never answered straight away as she was finishing buttering her last slice of toast. She stabbed the knife back into the slab of butter and picked up both plates. “Eggs on toast?” she gently placed the plates in front of Wynonna and where she had planned to sit. She turned back around to retrieve the mugs of coffee.

Wynonna looked over the plate of food, “Mmm, so you’re cooking for me now? Such wife material”, the term rolled naturally off her tongue, however it made Rosita feel fuzzy inside and her lips pursed together. 

Rosita sat down at the table and placed a teaspoon in the sugar and the jug of milk on the table. “You’re not going into work on an empty stomach, so here we are”, she smiled coyly. “Also, I don’t know how you take your coffee”, she pointed towards the sugar and milk. “So here you go”.

Wynonna scooted the sugar jar towards her and spoke out loud the directions as she made her coffee as she liked it, “Three su”-

“Three?” Rosita sounded shocked even with a mouthful of toast.

Wynonna couldn’t help but think of when Nicole and Waverly had made fun of her for being ‘unattractive’ when she shoveled pancakes into her mouth the other day. _We’re perfect for each other._ The slight chuckle didn’t go unnoticed, Rosita held her hand up to her mouth as she became self-conscious and swallowed down her food, hard.

“What?”

Wynonna shook the memory from her mind, “Nothing”. She continued to pick up the milk, just adding a dash to barely change the colour of the beverage. She looked at Rosita who was studying the preparation, Wynonna explained, “I need all the caffeine I can get”. Wynonna placed her lips around the mug’s rim, the surface was warm against the inside of her bottom lip, and took a sip.

“Erggh”, she frowned and her eyebrows pushed together. She discarded the cup off to the side.

Rosita started to place her eggs onto her fork, “Hey, _you_ made it!”

“Yeah it’s just missing the one component I don’t have”. Wynonna sulked as she put part of her egg inside the toast and folded it in half, and took a purposeful bite.

“…Your whiskey? I noticed the empty bottles in the cupboard. Those two, they mean business”. Rosita took a couple of mouthfuls of coffee and ignored the slight overspill at the corners of her lips.

“Yeah, unfortunately for me they care _too_ much about _this_ sorry case”. She eyed up the coffee that seemed to mock her misfortune.

“It’s a good thing, trust me”. Rosita didn’t push any further as she was well aware, she had already brought up some trauma from when they were on the bed.

The next few minutes were taken up with the background chatter of daytime tv and the scrapes of cutlery across their plates.

Wynonna neatly placed her fork and knife together and balanced them on the edge of the ceramic, “I finish work at 12am, you’re welcome to stay here…onlyifyouwantto”, the latter came out all in one breath as she was conscious of not sounding needy, though she craved for Rosita to stay with her.

Rosita untucks her chair and places her plate on top of Wynonna’s. “Sure, I’ll be here”, the shorter woman started to retreat back into Wynonna’s bedroom to collect her towel and was no more than five steps up the stairs when Wynonna called.

“Hey! Where you off to?”

Rosita continues walking up the stairs, each step made a new floorboard creak. “I cooked…you clean”, her voice got quieter the further away she got.

Wynonna couldn’t help but crack a smile and shook her head at the confidence Rosita had, that she dared to put thee Wynonna Earp to work. _I like it._

****

** *6pm* **

Rosita had slipped into some of Wynonna’s clothes. She hadn’t looked at the outfit she had thrown together until she stood in front of the full-length mirror that hung near the bottom of the stairs. As she glanced at her reflection, the only thing that came to mind was, ‘ _Thank god we ‘sorta’ have the same style’_. Her face was bare, all she could find was some chapstick and foundation that was way too light for her. The freeing feeling of no makeup was unusual, so naturally, Rosita felt a little exposed but she came to realise it would only be Wynonna who would see her today.

She sat on the arm of the couch and allowed herself to fall back along the cushions. Rosita fished out the remote control she felt protruding against her spine and turned the channel over to play some music. The tinny speakers partially filled the house with some ‘pop’ song – it definitely wasn’t anything the brunette was into, but she rolled with it. Her phone caught her attention when it rang out as it lay on the coffee table, she wriggled her body to position herself just enough to be able to reach the device.

_“Hey” Mia didn’t breathe long enough to give Rosita a chance to respond. “So, in response to your last message about dinner recommendations, do you want fancy or humble?”_

_“Well, it’ll be like our first (alone) date. I want to set a vibe, you know, show her that I really enjoy being with her”._

_“Gotcha!” Mia snaps her fingers; the sound was distant through the phone. “There’s a nice little place, I’ll text through the name and address. It’s on the outskirts just before town. Probably a 30-minute drive? Call ahead, they’re always near capacity most nights so get there first”._

_“You’re a life-saver”, Rosita’s gratitude shone through her words. “Are you on the early shift with me tomorrow?” her fingers, on the one hand, started to cross with the hope she could plan to have a chilled Monday morning._

_“Yes! You’re graced with my beautiful presence, bright and early”. Mia’s sarcasm sat in her words; she could hear Rosita scoff at her ‘presence’ claim._

The pair chatted back and forth for the best part of an hour, that was until Rosita was startled by the sound of a key in the lock since she knew Wynonna wasn’t due home for another 5(ish) hours. She said her goodbye to Mia and hung up the call as Waverly shook the un-melted snowflakes off her coat and the top of her head.

“Woah!” the younger girl’s voice heightened in surprise. “Oh, sorry Rosita. I didn’t think anyone would be here, ‘cause you know, Wynonna is at work. Where’s your bike?”

“It’s around the back” Rosita’s head naturally gestured towards the backyard. “Sorry if I scared you. Wyn said I could stay since I’m going to be here until tomorrow”.

Waverly nodded with acknowledgment and cut straight to the chase. “Did she get the note?”

Rosita gestured her hand towards the kitchen and Waverly’s eyes landed on the unfolded piece of paper that was left on the dining table.

“Good…” she gave a smile – it was more for herself than Rosita. “Ughh, how did she take it?”

“You might want to have that conversation with your sister”, the dark brunette sat up and kicked her legs down off the couch and watched the way Waverly moved around the homestead.

“I tried, and it ended up a little heated. She hasn’t spoken to either Nicole or I. So, can you please tell me if I need to prepare for another ‘angry’ Wynonna moment?” Waverly finally stopped and perched on the armchair near the Christmas tree.

“Well…” Rosita left the room and returned with the note. “She cried?”, she passed the note to Waverly and pointed her fingers over the water marks where Wynonna’s tears had stained and made the pen bleed. “I don’t think it was anger, _no_ , it was guilt – _yeah_ – definitely like she felt she had let you down…I think she feels like she has let herself down”. Rosita sat back down, this time she had her elbows resting against her thighs.

Waverly seemed to try and defend her action, “I just care about her, I had to do something and she won’t talk to me…does she talk to you”. Rosita lightly shook her head with a forced smile.

“Not properly, but she’s starting to. I think it’s not about whether she thinks you can deal with it; I think it’s more like she’s coming to terms with whatever she’s dealing with”.

The younger girl got up and gave Rosita a hug, “Thank you for being here with her, I’d hoped she would go and find you”. She smiled with sincerity. “Anyway, I only came back for my school books, I’ll be out of your hair in a bit”, she left and started to climb the stairs.

* * *

** *9pm* **

Doc was just heading out for the evening when he stepped up to Wynonna as she left the cellar. Wynonna placed the fresh crate of rum in the doorway. “See you tomorrow?”

“Actually Wynonna, about last night. Is everything okay?”, Doc messed with the brim of his hat in his hands. He’s always sincere in his questioning but it never gets any easier for the old-fashioned man to not be awkward about it – it’s what makes him and Wynonna so similar.

Wynonna eyed up the queue forming in front of Chrissy, she saw how the blonde was glancing over with desperation for Wynonna to return back to the bar to fulfil their orders.

“Yeah, everything’s cool”. She answered quickly to try and get him off of her back. She made her stance a little wider as she picked back up the heavy crate that was resting against the toes of her boots. She made her way behind the bar and placed a new bottle in Chrissy’s hand, who immediately started to fill the glasses she had lined up.

The man with the intense moustache stood off to the side, he continued the conversation.

“Wynonna”. He paused as he watched how quickly she fulfilled all the order’s the blonde was getting overwhelmed with and the punters returned back to their tables. “Waverly is worried about you; you need to answer her. I am not getting in between the Earp’s”. He picked up his hat off the bar and drank back the rum Wynonna had placed in front of him, he knocked the bar top as he left.

Wynonna took in what he had said, she knew he was right but she also knew that she wasn’t able to speak to Waverly unless it was face to face. She made a mental note to eventually text Waverly as soon as her shift finished, just to let her know she’s okay.

The sound of glasses clinking around the room brought her back from her own thoughts. Chrissy pushed against the brunette as she tried to get from one side of the bar to the other. “What was that about Wy?”. Chrissy’s attention was mostly focused on wiping up the spillages in front of her.

“You know, sibling drama”, she tried to laugh it off because she knew she wasn’t going to get into all the fiddly details whilst on the clock.

“I actually don’t know”. She scoffed and shook her head, whilst spraying some cleaning solution.

“Oh yeah, lil’ Nedley is the one and only”. Wynonna picked up her notepad and pushed a pen into her bun as she started to leave the blonde’s side to go take a table order.

Green eyes rolled at the nickname and watched how her colleague walked to the table full of burly men.

* * *

Wynonna wolf whistled as she looked up the attic’s ladder to be greeted with Rosita’s backside. “Ayye, it’s a full moon tonight!”.

Rosita scoffed; her cheeks couldn’t contain the smile she tried so hard to hide. “I aim to please”. She waggled her bum just to be cheeky and continued climbing the last step until she was back on a solid foundation. She looked back down at the younger woman who had started her own ascent.

“It’s super creepy to be in an attic after midnight”, there was some hesitation in her voice as she looked around the dark void.

“I know” Wynonna reached the top of the ladders. “This is why I made you go first”. She smirked as she handed Rosita one of two torches.

“Oh, that was so lovely of you”, playfully Rosita snatched the torch from pale hands and slid the switch to illuminate the hidden corners of the room. “Right so where do I look for the rest of these decorations?”

The tanned woman waved around her torch as she scanned the boxes that seemed to go on forever. “How much stuff do two people need?”.

“Wynonna?”, the older woman started to turn around.

“Wazzuuuup!”, Wynonna shook her head with her tongue hanging out, whilst her free hand did a ‘rock on’ gesture.

“Ugh, FUCK YOU!”, Rosita held her chest, almost as if she was trying to make sure her heart stayed in her chest. “So not funny”. She punched Wynonna in the shoulder.

Wynonna lowered the torch from her face as she doubled over in hysterics. “It was a little funny…it was a lotta funny”.

“That doesn’t even make sense, dummy”. She sucked her teeth in annoyance of the whole situation. “Where’re these decorations then?

Wynonna finally calmed down and pointed her flashlight over her shoulder. “Those four boxes”.

“Four? You guys go all out for Christmas or something”. Rosita joked.

“Waverly and I – _mostly_ Waverly, insisted we started having some nice Christmases since I missed several with her. This is the first since we’ve been back together, as a family”.

Rosita picked up one box as Wynonna went down backwards on the ladders.

“Oi, be careful!”, Rosita instinctively called out as she saw the top of the brunette’s head disappear below eye level.

“Yeahyeahyeah”, she brushed off the concern shown towards her. “Okay, pass it now”. She held out her hands until the cardboard box was placed between them.

Rosita disappeared from the hatch to grab the two smaller boxes that was labeled, ‘fragiles <3’ and ‘whatever the fuck you do don’t drop this (cause I’ll drop you)’. She choked out the laugh that tickled the back of her throat. She called out to Wynonna, “I’m guessing you were the one who wrote a threat to somebody on a Christmas box”.

Wynonna reappeared, “Duh!” and shrugged her shoulders as if it should’ve been expected.

The women finished emptying the attic, Wynonna locked the hatch again whilst Rosita carefully manoeuvred down the stairs and set the boxes in the hallway. Rosita couldn’t help but notice a family photo album that was resting at the top of the box – Wynonna had already given her permission to have a look through the boxes anyway.

Wynonna skipped down the last steps and set down the ‘fragiles’. “You found anything good?”

Rosita waved the photo album in her hand, “This? Can I look through it?”

Wynonna took Rosita’s free hand and led her to her bedroom. Rosita flicked on the light, whilst Wynonna took the photo album out of her hands and lay across her bed. Rosita slumped down next to her and watched as the first pages were flicked through.

Pale fingers traced the faces in the first Christmas photo they came across, after endless minutes of Rosita cooing over baby Wynonna and looking at how Waverly has always been petite.

“That’s Willa” Wynonna’s pointer finger brushed across the tallest girl with blonde hair. She stuck out like a sore thumb compared to Wynonna and Waverly. “She was mama’s double”, she scoffed to hide the hurt she couldn’t help but feel. Her finger continued to pass over the rest of those pictured, “…daddy, mama, me and Waverly”. Wynonna’s voice latched on a while longer when addressing the missing family members.

“You have another sister?” Rosita’s voice falters with confusion as she slid the photo out of its plastic wallet to get a better look. She adjusted the photo as the invasive brightness of the exposed lightbulb glared violently off the photograph’s sheen.

“Had”. Wynonna’s voice was flat, there was no expression of emotion at all. “She’s 24 now. She got out by the time she turned 17. She couldn’t take us…I was what, 11 (?) and Waves was 9. She did what she had to for herself”.

The younger woman tried not to hold resentment for her elder sister – but she couldn’t help but reminisce at the idea of having an older sister to look after her, like she was doing for Waverly. Rosita slotted the photo back into its wallet and continued to turn pages with Wynonna. Wynonna would occasionally stop and disclose some memories associated with the photo.

“You’re not in this one?”

“December 2015…this is when I finally got out”. Wynonna held her lips together and forced a smile at the bittersweet memory. She pulled out the photo and flipped it over in her hands and read ‘Christmas Day 2015. Gus, Curtis, Waverly (14)’. She passed the picture to Rosita, almost as if she couldn’t bear to look at what she left behind. The cheeky smile Waverly had in all the past photos seemed to have vanished – along with most of her family.

Rosita went back and forth with the idea but settled with the original and placed her arm around Wynonna when she saw several tears topple from her waterline. “So, where did your mom and dad go? I mean, o – only answer if you want to”. Rosita tripped over her words as she didn’t want to force Wynonna to disclose something, she wasn’t ready for.

“August 2015, dad finally drank himself to death and a few months later mama dropped Waverly off for a sleepover at aunt Gus’ and uncle Curtis’ one night and ended up not coming back. They said she wasn’t coping…I dunno, we never really coped to start with, we’re the Earps?”. Wynonna rejected the explanation she was given as soon as she got back to Purgatory.

Rosita blew out some cool air, “Ooof, that must’ve been rough”. She shook the roots of her as if the tension from the stories Wynonna shared were weighing her down. “I’m sorry about your parents anyway”, she sincerely caressed Wynonna’s cheek to soothe her.

“Ahh, don’t worry. They weren’t that great anyway”. Wynonna frantically flicked back around 13 pages of memories and landed on her most treasured memory – granted she doesn’t have many.

* * *

_ Christmas Day -2010 _

_“Shut up”, Willa whisper hissed at Wynonna as they creeped down the stairs._

_Ward and Michelle were already passed out in their bed, and Waverly was two doors down all tucked up in a mountain of blankets that she had always insisted on as soon as she was able to string two words together. The older sisters made it their mission to make this year special for Waverly – since they knew it was going to be one of the last year’s that ‘Santa’ was going to be real for Waverly. Willa had always taken the lead in setting up for Christmas morning, since Wynonna wasn’t old enough and her parents had no interest in making the day ‘magical’. On the days leading up to the 25 th, the blonde would harvest resources, e.g. glitter and stock it in her pockets and drawers so that even if her sisters started to snoop, they wouldn’t find it. She’d made it a habit ever since she turned 12 and the look on the younger Earp’s faces on Christmas day, made the sneaking around worth it. _

_Since Willa was the eldest, she handed out her orders to Wynonna who was backed up against the wall at the bottom of the stairs. Blonde strands hung directly in front of the shorter girl as Willa towered above her by a good 6inches, she placed both of her hands lightly on the brunette’s shoulders and looked into her eyes. “Wy, go get one of daddy’s boots”_

_Wynonna’s face scrunched up in confusion, “Why?”_

_“We’re going to make Santa’s dirty footprints”._

_Wynonna’s face lit up, partially because she was going to make this year memorable for years to come but also, she knew that making muddy footprints on the wooden floors of the homestead would cause hysterics with her mother._

_“On it!”_

_Willa emphasised a “Shh!” as she watched her little sister slip on a coat way too big for her and disappeared into the backyard and made her way towards the barn._

_The eldest left to collect her supplies she had hidden under the loose floorboard; she and Wynonna had found years ago. It was their go to place to sneak sweets their uncle (Curtis) had given them on the sly whilst they were visiting. Wynonna slithered through the door and discarded the coat off of her small frame and passed the boot to Willa. The older girl dragged the younger to the fireplace and rubbed the sole into the cinders and left-over burnt wood._

_“Where shall we put the prints, front door or in front of the chimney?”, Willa spoke whilst wandering back and forth as if she was trying to visualise where the footprints would lead._

_Wynonna perked up as she sat on the edge of the coffee table next to the cookies and a glass of milk, Waverly had placed their several hours prior. “Front door, Waverly’s smart – she’ll figure out Santa won’t land ass first into soot”._

_Willa instinctively back-handed Wynonna’s shoulder, “Language?”._

_“Ow!” she glared at her sister and rubbed the tender spot on her arm._

_They rubbed the boot into the wood grains it left a light enough print to be able to sweep it off in the morning but it remained noticeable enough to be ‘believable’. Willa pulled a small cylinder-shaped bottle from her pyjama pocket that sat across her chest and spun the white cap off. She shook some glitter into the palm of Wynonna’s hands and gave her the job to make ‘Santa contact zones’ around the house._

_She crept around the homestead, placing her glittered hands onto door handles, wall partitions, and on the presents, they had finished wrapping not that long ago._

_“Can I have the cookies this year?”, the youngest girl had already dusted off her palms on the knees of her onesie and grabbed the three cookies off the plate. She slumped on the couch and already started to shovel them into her mouth._

_“Suuuure”, she dragged out her agreement with a hint of defeat. “I don’t think I have much of a choice?” she gestured to her sister who had a mouthful of cookies. Willa scooted up to Wynonna and wiped her thumb over the corner of her mouth to get rid of the melted chocolate._

_“Alright mom!”, Wynonna rolled her eyes with ‘fake annoyance’ and shrugged her older sister off her shoulder. They sat in a comfortable silence that was kept company by the subtle crunches from Wynonna._

_“Mission accomplished, until next year…”, Wynonna gave a huge grin._

_Willa gave a quick nod to her sister as she pulled down on the handle gently to avoid it making the trademark squeaking noise when she opened the door to their bedroom. She held back a few seconds to let Wynonna go into the room first._

_A wash of guilt took over her body whilst she shut to the door, she’d already made her decision that would change the family’s dynamic for years to come._

* * *

** Present Day **

“…and that was our last Christmas with Willa, the day after, she left. It was like she wanted to create a positive experience for Waverly before she up and left us completely broken”.

Wynonna left the photo album open as Rosita shuffled the picture back to where it had been stored the past few years. She scooped her curls around her shoulders as she rested her back against her headboard. Her pale blues were transfixed on the petite figure hunched over the book of memories, in all honesty, Wynonna was surprised that Rosita was taking the time to try and learn about her upbringing. Most people assume to know the Earp’s and draw their own conclusions – but not Rosita, she didn’t assume a single thing.

Silence encompassed the room and Wynonna found herself staring out the moonlight that lit up the area outside her bedroom window. The snowflakes had started to settle on the windowsill and the frost had started to make it a little harder to see the scenery that was draped in a blanket of white.

A deep breath stifled in her chest cavity; she removed her gaze off the silver orb. “I know you wouldn’t hurt me, Ro”.

Golden browns met with the cooling blues, at first, she was caught off guard – completely confused until she had remembered this morning’s conversation. Rosita closed to the photo album and pulled herself up on all fours and clambered off the bed, album in hand, and placed it off on some furniture.

“You can flick the light off since you’re up”.

Rosita took the instruction in her stride and Wynonna leaned over to switch the lamp on. The darker brunette mimicked Wynonna’s previous movement and laid her back comfortably on the headboard. She held her hand palm facing up on Wynonna’s thigh, just to offer her hand. The touch of Rosita on her body – not even bare skin, was enough to evoke a feeling of anxiety. This time she didn’t run away from this feeling, she fell into it – eyes wide open, and placed her slender, long fingers into the smaller hand and clasped around it. Instinctively Rosita brushed her thumb against the subtle raises of Wynonna’s veins as she knew she was nervous, the small vibrations from the shakiness of the other’s hands showed a level of unrest.

“You don’t have to explain what happened this morning”, Rosita’s eyes were stuck on the way her hand was swallowed up by a covering of white – such a metaphorical way of replicating what the outside of the homestead looked like.

The tightness in Wynonna’s chest took her breath away, she fought the dead weight that had lived with her throughout her childhood and adolescence, as if by her saying what happened out loud will make it all the more real. But it was real. It happened to her…she got through it. Though it doesn’t take the hurt away. Rosita didn’t say anything more, she knew Wynonna had heard her statement and that it was up to her if she said anything in response. Instead, she took the moment for face value – once again the vulnerability hit like a storm, she could see the way it tore Wynonna up to acknowledge the root of a lot of her struggles.

Pale pink lips parted slightly as the tongue swiped across the surface, her mouth was unbelievably dry as her saliva had already made a quick exit as soon as the memories came flooding back.

**(Trigger warning)**

“Ever since I can remember, my dad had a bad temper…and, when he drank – you get the picture”, Wynonna quickly looked to Rosita who was already looking back at her. The apprehension rushed to the pits of her stomach and her voice grew unsteady and she had to look away again if she was going to explain herself fully. Without missing a beat Rosita encased both her hands around Wynonna’s that were already being soothed.

“So, when dad drank, mama would get Willa to take Waverly and me out of the house. Willa would take us to the park and then make a long pitstop at uncle Curtis’ – maybe I can’t call it a pitstop, it was never quick”. Wynonna tried to laugh it off as she could hear how her voice started to crack with emotion. “Most times we didn’t see anything, but we weren’t stupid. We came back to missing the odd cup or plate… mama would have a new bruise – she would try so hard not to wince when moving. I always knew how Willa would fetch the peas from the freezer when daddy had stormed off to bed”.

Rosita continued listening to Wynonna, the way her childhood was so fractured – the way Wynonna explained herself makes so much more sense to her now. It didn’t deter her – _no_ – it made her more driven to show Wynonna what it means to be cared for. _That doesn’t fit right, what it feels like to be loved_ , the thought passed through Rosita’s mind and she wasn’t afraid that she was still falling for this woman who was pouring out her past.

“As we got older, we started to push boundaries – guess that was our fault”, she huffed out the last words which became muffled when her hand rubbed against her mouth as she felt discomfort.

“You were kids, it’s what kids do…you aren’t to blame for what he did”, Rosita squeezed Wynonna’s hand to show her that she was still here”.

“Eventually, we ended up getting hurt and mama, well, she couldn’t leave him”. _I will never understand why she didn’t leave_. “Fast forward many, _many_ years” Wynonna became aware of Rosita’s touch. “Willa couldn’t take it anymore, then it was my turn to disappear; my early 16th birthday present to myself was to get as far away from my parents as possible”. Wynonna started nodding as she recalled the memory. “He died and mama left”. She wiped her eyes before the tears could even drizzle down her cheeks. “I regretted having to leave Waverly behind, it weighed on my mind every day I was gone – she did well without me, she thrived with Uncle Curtis and Aunt Gus… _I knew she would_ ”, the last 4 words accidentally slipped from her mouth, she hadn’t planned to say them out loud.

**(Trigger warning end)**

Nothingness filled the bedroom, the muted sound of the doubting fire in the living-room created a calming atmosphere. Wynonna settled in closer to Rosita, which took the darker brunette by surprise as she was still trying to process what she had just been told. Rosita unclasped her hands which freed Wynonna’s and placed her thumb gently against the small dent on Wynonna’s chin and her pointer finger sat (curved) underneath the chin. The gentleness Rosita proceeded with was foreign to the other woman. Such delicacy – almost as if Wynonna would crumble if any more pressure was placed upon her. It wasn’t patronising, like Rosita was treating her differently now she knew about her past, it was comforting(?), supportive(?) – **no** – sincere.

“I only came back for Waverly. Then Haughty got on my case – _I kinda like her, please don’t tell her_. Then you…” Wynonna nudged the other’s arm. “…Miss Bustillos” she couldn’t help but smile as she could hear how her life was actually turning around.

With her other hand, the honied skin glossed against the trail of tears that had fallen whilst Wynonna rested against her a few moments prior. The dampness that rested on her finger’s knuckle slowly dried in the warm air.

Wynonna finally looked up to the woman that was handling her with such care. She’d looked into Rosita’s eyes before. In fact, she’d gotten lost in them quite a few times. This was different though, there was a mutual understanding that this was more than Wynonna had told anyone. That this was genuine. _There’s that feeling again like I’m stumbling…walking aimlessly to a Rosita shaped piece of heaven._ The lighter brunette had felt this ‘feeling’ more and more often, practically every time she laid eyes on Rosita, her legs would go to jelly and her body temperature would rise ever so slowly. It was the effect she knew she couldn’t deny any longer.

She succumbed.

Wynonna leant in closer to Rosita. The scent of cherry blossoms got stronger. Her eyes bounced between the stormy ones and Rosita’s naturally plump, lightly coloured lips. They seemed to be magnetic, there was no stopping her.

Until Rosita pulled back. “Wyn, you don’t need to do something you aren’t ready for?”

Wynonna stopped her advance and held her head on a tilt with a slight smirk. “You don’t want to kiss me?”

“Of course, I do. I’ve been wanting to for a while”. Rosita tucked a stray strand of hair behind Wynonna’s ear and cupped her jaw in the palm of her hand _. Hmmm, that’s fitting, my main source of happiness in the palm of my hand_. Her mind became foggy as she knew that ‘ _this’_ was happening _now_ , and she wasn’t going to turn it down.

Their hands settled against each other and their lips pressed together. At first, it was light, like they were testing out boundaries. Immediately it became clear that they were desperate, Wynonna deepened the kiss with each wave of emotion that flooded through her body, she happily rode them out. Gentle moans escaped from Rosita as she felt overpowered by the other woman, hands wandered across her chest and over her ribcage.

After a moment, Rosita took control and snuck her tongue into Wynonna’s partially open mouth. She had never understood when it was said that someone’s taste could be captivating, until now. There was a warmth – _cinnamon_ , that’d be close enough to explain the sensation. Her heart took over her body’s movements and pulled Wynonna on top of her lap, which Wynonna instinctively straddled as she came up for a breather.

Breathless and exhilarated Wynonna forced out, “Damn”. Her chest rose and fell quickly as she tried to compose the flustered mess she had become. “If I knew being vulnerable would’ve been rewarded with a kiss, I would’ve done it sooner”. Wynonna placed her hands on Rosita’s shoulders.

“I’m glad you didn’t…”

Wynonna sat back against Rosita’s thighs and rested her hands on her shins, she feigned a look of offense.

“What I mean, is that I’m happy you told me on your own terms. Being vulnerable, honest…open is difficult. It could only be you who was able to make this decision”. Rosita wrapped her hands around Wynonna’s waist and pulled her forward. The lighter brunette couldn’t hold the scowl for long, she choked out her stifled laugh and collapsed forward to plant a kiss on her lips.


	8. Sugar and spice and all things Haught(?) (Part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Earp sister's make up after and actually speak & listen to each other - no filter.  
> There's a glance of what Wynonna and Nicole's friendship is like when they aren't surrounded by others.
> 
> (I'm awful at summaries)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Drowning your demons playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2QliA7qcg6bEtrBL3R8rhT?si=3PfkjN5HS2OC1mQSvHy0lw)  
> [ Wynonna's Playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3Jk2K31UYXNGGsN4RzsshF?si=ot_Cds85SCKiXiunAd6e6Q)   
> [ Waverly's Playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4SDdXZq61xrtHyMcAvJ5l6?si=vCRP14tOTya2FQp7uonkEw)

** 20th December **

Waverly had been sitting in her Jeep for the past 15 minutes since Nicole’s debate practice had ran over. Usually, she wouldn’t have minded, but the past few days she had preferred not to be left alone. Her run-in with Wynonna triggered memories she had rather forget. Things she thought she had forgotten…things she pretended never happened. She spent nearly all the time in the car picking at her nails – which reminded her she was well overdue for a manicure. But also, Waverly was more aware that she was going to have to face Wynonna. Yes – she loves her sister but love alone doesn’t stop you from being upset or disappointed in them.

Wynonna fulfilled the promise she made to herself and texted Waverly the next day after Doc spoke to her, it read:

 _Got your note. Rosita’s been with me last night and she will be tonight too. No drinking for me, I’m trying_.

Her hazel eyes glazed over as she stared at the message which she still hadn’t replied to. She hadn’t got a clue what to say which is why she felt so guilty. It was Wynonna, her sister…the only family she had left, and she didn’t know how to speak to her or even offer support. From what Rosita deciphered from Wynonna’s reaction, didn’t go unnoticed by Waverly. She hadn’t considered that what her sister was feeling wasn’t so simple as she originally thought, she can’t help but kick herself for not realising sooner that her older sister is probably just figuring all this shit out for herself.

Nicole pulled open the back door to the Jeep. “Hey baby”, she called through to the front that made Waverly jolt in her seat, she slid her phone into her jacket.

The keys were already dangling from the ignition, which started to jingle as Waverly’s knee brushed past them. “Hey sweetie”, she replied as she grasped the key to turn the engine over.

The couple drove in silence, which was unusual, Waverly would’ve sparked a mini-concert by now. This is how Nicole knew something was weighing on her girlfriends’ mind. Waverly seemed almost mesmerized as she focused on the road ahead, just like she had been the past 10 minutes. Her eyes finally pulled away as Nicole’s hand was placed on her thigh.

“Something on your mind?” Nicole watched as Waverly gathered her thoughts.

“Can you come round tomorrow? I want to get the decorating finished and make some crafts…like we planned on doing before all this”. Waverly took her hands off the steering wheel for a few seconds to gesture her annoyance at the situation.

Nicole wasn’t convinced by the explanation she gave but she went along with it, “Sure?”

Waverly shrugged off her thoughts and enjoyed the gentle caress of her thigh from her girlfriend. The redhead leaned forward to turn on the radio and replaced her hand onto Waverly. Both girls sat comfortably as they listened to the low volume pop songs that filled the silence for the rest of the drive to Nicole’s house.

Waverly pulled up and drove the jeep into the deep, soft, muddy tyre tracks. The wheel’s spun and kicked up the loose earth which splattered against the red bodywork. Nicole noticed the hot air Waverly blew out as she realised, she just fucked the paintwork she just had washed a couple of days ago. She rested her arms across the steering wheel and her forehead rested against them. Nicole rubbed her hand across Waverly’s back, she knew that would help relax her.

“Is this all about speaking to Wynonna?”

Waverly groaned in response, barely lifting her head.

“C’mon Waves, it’s your sister. All you can do is be honest. Rosita told you her reaction, she’s not angry…just struggling”. Nicole continued to smooth the light brunette strands down her back. “Tell her what you need to, then let her say what she needs to. I’m on the other end of the phone if you need me”, Waverly looked up in appreciation for Nicole’s empathy.

She leaned in to kiss Waverly goodbye, “I’ll see you tomorrow, about 10am?”

“10am”, she cracked a smile of reassurance. “Thank you, babe, you always know the right things to say”.

Nicole hoisted her bag from behind her seat and dragged it through the gap between the passenger and driver’s seat. She hopped out the car and closed the door to, Waverly waited until she saw her girlfriend’s mom open the front door and did her usual wave from the porchway.

* * *

Both Earp girls were surprised at how easy the conversation had flowed, no awkwardness, no smartass remarks, and no half-assed answers for a good 45minutes. Waverly had come to understand that Wynonna is just trying to figure out her life and is trying to make sure she doesn’t go through the same.

The darker brunette had mentioned her alcohol dependency, which Waverly was proud to see Wynonna call it what it is – rather than ‘a lil’ drink from time to time’. In response, the young Earp tried to offer her support which Wynonna accepted and was thankful for, but she was well aware that she was barely 16. Wynonna couldn’t help but think, _what type of person puts that added pressure onto their little sister._

They devoured the abundance of Chinese food Wynonna had ordered. The older Earp dangled the noodles into her mouth from her chopsticks as she finished her meal and discarded the cardboard box onto the floor next to the couch.

Wynonna sat cross-legged on the worn floorboards of the homestead, she lifted her arm to motion Waverly to resume the position she used to do as a child. The lighter brunette was amazed by the gesture as it had been years since Wynonna was the one to offer affection first, but she refused to deny this moment. The caramel waves pooled in the older Earp’s lap and the younger tucked her knees into herself. Wynonna’s hand rested against the silk-like strands as she slowly ran her fingers through them. She was surprised how such a simple act from her childhood relaxed her, almost as if she was transported back to a simpler but far from perfect time.

The Earp’s spent the next half hour enjoying the quietness of their home and mumbled along to the Christmas songs that played from the speaker in the hallway.

“I spoke to Rosita yesterday-”

“I kissed Rosita yesterday -”, she acted like it had just slipped out, but in reality, she’d been bursting to tell her sister.

“…and I think she’s going to be really goo- WAIT, what? You- _you_ kissed?”. Waverly shot up from Wynonna’s lap and sat on the backs of her heels. The smile on her face beamed from ear to ear as the information started to settle in her mind.

Wynonna was silent, for once she felt like words couldn’t do her justice.

“Wynonna!”, Waverly shook her sister by the shoulders to jolt her back to the real world. “You can’t say that shit and dip on me”.

The darker brunette stretched out her legs, straight in front of her which just fell short of the soles of her feet pressing against the coffee table’s leg. She did her best to ignore her fluttering heart rate as she thought of the girl, she locked lips with.

“OMG! You’re blushing…Wynonna Earp, _my_ sister is blushing”. Waverly pinched her own arm, “ ’kay, so I’m not dreaming”. The younger girl was practically rocking side to side to displace her excitement to try and allow Wynonna to tell her what happened.

“Yeah…she helped me take down the boxes from the attic and she saw the photo album, she asked to have a look”.

Waverly flicked her hair off her shoulder, “And you let her?”

“Well, yeah. I like her, Waves. I think I should let her know about all the ‘not-so-great’ things about our family if I’m going to be honest”.

Waverly nodded in agreement.

“Anyways, it got emotional…I got emotional”, the older girl looked away from her sister as she admitted to being vulnerable. She was actively trying to not be so ashamed of showing emotions. “and she calmed me down, she didn’t look at me differently, there was no pity in her eyes. She stayed with me and made sure I was okay”. She couldn’t help but smile as she recalled last night’s events, but when she looked back to Waverly, she wasn’t greeted with the same excitement she had a few minutes earlier.

Waverly saw the confusion on Wynonna’s face and just came right out with it, “So, Rosita kissed you whilst you were emotionally vulnerable, was-was that the right thing?”

The other girl let out a small laugh and released the breath she was holding and repeated her admission from earlier with more emphasis. “Waves, _I_ kissed _her_ ”. Wynonna rested her jawline against the palm of her hand as if she felt defeated.

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m never going to hear the end of this from Haught-Cheeto”, Wynonna let her head drop back against the couch cushions, she could already hear the not-so-subtle comments from the redhead. She knows it would be payback from all the times she picked on her and Waverly. The younger Earp scoffed as she shook her head, knowing that this would be a new dynamic between her girlfriend and her sister.

The sister’s started to clear away the takeaway containers.

“So, are you two together now?”

“Shit – we didn’t establish the details”. Wynonna stopped her exit from the kitchen to the hallway. “Waves, I’m not a relationship person…”. She rested the right-hand side of her body against the door frame, to which there was no door.

Waverly finished pushing down the trash into the bin and took her foot off the pedal. She spun on the hot water tap and lathered her hands. “Non’s, have you considered that _you_ , maybe a relationship person, you just never found the right person?” Waverly shook the excess water from her fingertips and wiped them on the tea towel Wynonna had left crumpled on the side. The look of disgust from Waverly as she placed her hands on a cold, partially damp cloth sent shivers through her body.

Wynonna scrunched her face up with regret, “Sorry ‘bout that”.

They continued the conversation. “But you make a good point. Maybe Rosita is my person?”

Waverly cooed as she made her way towards her sister. “Look at you, being all soft and mushy”.

“I am not soft and ‘mushy’, I’m as hard as nails”. Wynonna was very unconvincing, but Waverly let her have her moment. Both girls wandered into the hallway. The once still ambience of Christmas music got much more prominent, Waverly was the one to turn it off.

“Nicole is coming ‘round to help with the decorating and to take part in our gingerbread house showdown”.

“Babygirl, you make it sound like a wrestling match”.

“It might become one, you and Nicole are so competitive”. 

“Oh, and you’re not?”, she rolled her eyes as she feigned annoyance. “G’night”.

Waverly slightly leaned up on her tiptoes to kiss Wynonna’s cheek in response. The smaller girl disappeared up the stairs.

* * *

“Hello beautiful”, Rosita’s greeted as she switched on facetime, Wynonna lagged for a few seconds. But not long enough for there to be any awkwardness.

She shook her head in disbelief, “I’m not even in good lighting”.

“I just know you look ‘that’ good”, Rosita wiggled her eyebrows at the other woman.

“Well, Bustillo’s. For what it’s worth, you don’t look bad yourself”, she finished the statement with a cheeky wink. 

Rosita placed her phone landscape propped against some pillows.

“I, err - I told Waves about our kiss”, the heat rushed to her cheeks. She was silently cursing herself for reacting like it was her first-ever kiss. _Which it was…with someone of the same-sex_.

“What was her reaction? Does she approve? I know I have to win her over…”. Rosita seemed to say everything all at once, she reminded Wynonna of an excitable puppy.

The younger woman bit on her nails causing a bitter chemical taste from her chipped nail varnish that sat on the tip of her tongue. She quickly wiped it off her tongue using the back of her hand. “She approves. It’s Haught you should be worried about really”.

Rosita sat up with some disbelief, “Really?”

“Really. We have this thing going. We pretend we don’t like each other, but she’s kinda the only other person I have. She has my back…so if you hurt me, good luck”. Wynonna snapped her fingers and pointed towards the camera.

“Noted”. Rosita saluted in a joking matter. “Anyways, I have a proposition for you”.

She raised her eyebrows with interest. “Are you about to build a house or…?”

Rosita couldn’t help but laugh at her question. “That’s planning permission. But I’m serious Wyn”.

“ ‘Kay…”

“Will you go out on a date with me?”

A genuine smile of happiness spread across her face, she showed off her teeth hidden beneath smooth lips. “Of course, I will go on a date with you. When?”

“How does the 23rd sound?”

“It’s going to be busy though, will we get a booking?”

“I have it sorted already. I just need you to get glammed up and say that you’ll be ready for 8pm”.

“Wait, you booked before even asking me. What happened if I said no?”

“A lonely dinner for 1”, Rosita laughed as she pushed away some hair that fell across her eyes as she lay down.

“Hmm, okay. See you at 8pm on the 23rd”.

* * *

The scent of cinnamon and ginger filled the house. Waves was up hours before Wynonna baking the gingerbread templates for the houses. She was hunched over the mixing bowl and baking tray as she scooped the mixture out and plopped it down onto pre-stencilled baking parchment. Waverly hummed along to Jack Johnson’s - Better together as she placed the trays into the oven, then started to sing under her breath.

“…And all of these moments just might find their way into my dreams tonight…” she pulled a stool from under the kitchen table and sat near the oven – she had a habit of constantly checking the things she bakes. Her phone was resting in her apron pocket and started to ring out and vibrate against her chest. It was just a couple of rings from Nicole to let her know she was outside.

Wynonna’s bedroom door flung open.

In a sing-songy voice, she emerged, “I know that sound!” The older sister b-lined to the front door, without even acknowledging her sister for the first time this morning. She unhooked the chain off the door and opened it to see Nicole just a few steps away from her.

“Haught-Cheeto!”, they high-fived each other before re-entering the homestead.

“Earp”, Nicole laughed at yet another new nickname and followed the shorter woman inside.

In a joking matter Wynonna started, “Sis, I found a stray ginge’ out the front -”. Her train of thought was utterly lost when she clapped eyes on the nearly empty mixing bowl and the wooden spoon that had some gingerbread mixture left on it.

Both Nicole and Waverly were already hugging, when Nicole sarcastically replied with, “Haha”, over Waverly’s shoulder.

The older girl didn’t pay her much attention and instead swooped through the living room to the kitchen and grabbed the spoon. You could’ve sworn her eyes dilated like she was looking at the love of her life.

She’d already shoved what she could fit of the spoon into her mouth when she heard the sounds of ‘kissing’ from behind her.

Nicole pulled away from Waverly first and sat with her on the couch and called into Wynonna who was exercising her tongue all over the spoon.

“So, no snarky comments or gagging sounds?” She turned to her girlfriend, “Is she sick, shall we call the doctor?”

Waverly leaned in and whispered (not-so-quietly) into her ear. “She’s in love, that’s what’s wrong”.

The redhead didn’t know what to make of that information, “Well fuck…I’m scared.” She couldn’t help but stare at the woman who was sitting on the kitchen counter with the bowl on her lap and the spoon hanging out of her mouth.

“What? I need breakfast”, Wynonna explained as she stared back at the couple.

“Since when?” they said in unison.

“Since Ro made me breakfast yesterday…and I’m not in love”.

Waverly was snuggled into Nicole, their hair mingled together against the red-heads shoulder.

Nicole spoke into her girlfriend’s hair, “She made her breakfast?”

“She made you breakfast?”

Licking her lips, she huffed. “Is it so hard to believe?”

“Not at all, you usually just don’t kiss the kind of people that make you breakfast”, Waverly’s eyes didn’t move off the tv.

“Woah!” Nicole shot up which forced Waverly to move from her once comfortable position. “Kissed?”

“Ugh, did you not fill her in?” Wynonna hopped off the counter and threw the utensils into the sink.

Nicole looked to Waverly for more information, but Waverly returned the look as if to say that she’ll tell her later.

Wynonna left them to it and headed back into her bedroom to finish getting ready.

* * *

***2pm***

Nicole and Wynonna were alone in the homestead since Waverly had left to grab some more art and craft’s supplies. Wynonna shuffled her Spotify playlist since she had been enduring Waverly’s for most of the day. The friends crashed on the couch with their cans of soda in hand, whilst ‘Voodoo child – Rogue Trader’s’ started to build up in the background.

Nicole kicked her feet up onto the coffee table and held the rim of her drink on the arm of the couch. Wynonna tried to copy the movement but she had to slide down her seat a little more so her feet would reach the coffee table’s surface. The redhead noticed the extra effort she went to just to copy her. Wynonna took a sip of the fizzing beverage and Nicole noted how it wasn’t alcohol – she could count on one hand how many times she has seen Wynonna without an alcoholic drink. Unpainted nails tapped the side of the aluminium can and she cleared her throat, ready for her burning questions.

“You and Rosita, it’s a real thing then?”. Nicole pulled her hair from being caught between her back and the back of the couch.

Wynonna clicked her tongue against the inside of her bottom lip, “There it is”. She grinned as she thought about getting to speak about Rosita to her ‘best’ friend. She rested her right arm across the back of the couch and passed her drink between her hands, right to left. “Yeah it’s real. Well, no there’s no label yet. But it doesn’t matter, she’s not pitiful of me or judgemental”.

“Good – I’m glad.”

“She’s a sexy version of you”

Nicole choked on a mouthful of coke; she pinched her nose to help relieve the stinging of bubbles. Wynonna knew exactly what she had done but instead just watched on in amusement, “You okay there?”

Nicole would’ve given the middle finger, but she was more than occupied, “Bite me”

“Now, now don’t let my baby sister hear you say that”.

“Piss off”.

She flipped her hair over her shoulder as she got up to grab some tissues for the redhead.

Wynonna reappeared whilst bopping to ‘Gangsta – Kehlani’ and wore a smirk on her face as she saw the running eyes of her friend, it was like she had been through a traumatic revelation. Nicole wasn’t impressed, so as soon as Wynonna was close enough, she snatched the tissues from her hands and started to dab her eyes.

“No need to cry, fireball”, she continued around the couch and sat back in her space.

Through a grimace, Nicole managed, “I hate you so much Earp” and threw down a scrunched-up piece of tissue.

“Ahh” Wynonna laughed a little knowing she was joking. “Nah you don’t, you could never” and nudged her arm which only earned her an eye roll.

“Anyways…enough about you and your inability of being able to drink. I’m going on a date – save it!” she warned as she darted a look across the couch. Nicole immediately closed her mouth again and continued to listen.

“She said ‘bout getting glammed up. The fuck does that mean?”. Wynonna laid her back against the arm of the couch, so she was directly facing Nicole.

“Wynonna, you’re asking the wrong person plus you don’t glam up for anyone. What are you going to wear?” Nicole held her head as if she was having a deliberation with herself. “Do you own anything that’s suitable for a date?”

The brunette shrugged her shoulders and let out a sigh, “See! This is why I don’t date. If you’re screwing someone, you don’t need to worry about clothes…they’ll last about 5 minutes anyway”. She folded her arms in defeat (already).

“Oi, no giving up on my watch”. The redhead kicked her foot against the older girl’s knee to grab her dwindling attention. “You’re going to have to go shopping with Waverly”, the latter part of her sentence was practically hard to hear as she started to stifle a laugh at the idea of Wynonna having to go shopping, full stop, let alone with her little sister.

“Bruh, Haught. Do you know what she’s like in a mall…oh.my.god?” Wynonna closed her eyes and let her head fall back. “Imma need a drink before that”.

Silence pooled in the atmosphere for a split second, but the awkwardness made it feel like forever, Wynonna snapped her head up. “I’m kidding, you can unclench”.

The younger girl gave her a death stare and pulled out her phone.

“Oi!”, she echoed Nicole’s warning. “No snitching”, she waggled her finger at the girl as she started to type on her own phone.

In reassurance, with no words said Nicole held up her phone which showed her Twitter timeline instead. Wynonna gave her a thumbs up and laid her legs across the redhead’s lap whilst they waited for Waverly.


	9. Sugar and spice and all things Haught(?) (Part 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some Christmassy fluff and it's all hands on deck as Wynonna and Rosita get ready for their date.

Wynonna swung on the stairs’ railing and called up to both girls who were doing God-knows-what in Waverly’s bedroom.

“Rosita’s coming over after work, at 9?” She didn’t wait for a reply before reeling off some ground rules. “No PDA, don’t ask about our date and don’t mention family…at all”. Her voice trailed away and softened as she sat down at the kitchen table to admire the shitshow of gingerbread houses lined up before her.

The trio successfully – _that’s a strong word_ , they ‘completed’ their gingerbread house showdown. Wynonna’s stood out a mile away, it was missing a roof; since she’d gotten hungry during the assembly process and Waverly failed to inform her, she didn’t make any extras. At least Nicole’s had a roof, even though on several occasions Wynonna tried to bribe her with the promise of an empty homestead to spend ‘alone’ time with Waverly _if_ she gave Wynonna her roof to finish the house she’d fucked up. Haught turned her down, which only got her house violated with some icing graffiti, with no thanks to Wynonna. Then Waverly explained her mishap; losing a wall, as that the house was ‘under construction’. Either way, they were all able to admit they had fun – which was all Waverly wanted from the day; to have new, better memories to help forget the old ones.

* * *

The two brunettes had been sat on the front steps of the homestead for no more than 20 minutes since her arrival. They hadn’t even made it inside since Wynonna made it very obvious, she wanted time alone with Rosita before a night of bonding with her sister and Nicole. The younger girl was wrapped in the darker brunette’s embrace, it shocked her how well she fit in them as she was the taller of the two. For the most part, they didn’t break the sound of the icy air flowing between the barren tree’s, every now and again the rusted, metal wind chime from the Earp’s childhood would tinkle with the last few remaining chime’s that were still hanging on.

** *Rosita’s POV* **

I rested the side of my face against the top of her head, she smells different, she smells nothing like _my_ Wynonna.

“Cinnamon?”

She hummed in response; I took that as a gesture to repeat what I’d said. She wiggled in my arms, I guessed that her bum was getting numb. We had been sitting here for a while.

“You smell like cinnamon? You don’t smell coconut-ty like you usually do?”. Her curls fell between my fingers as I combed through the thick locks. 

“Uhh”, I could see the huff of breath fall from her mouth and materialise into the atmosphere. “We were baking gingerbread houses”.

I couldn’t help but feel the way her jawline pressed against my chest as she spoke – _this is definitely real_. I know I don’t know everything about Wynonna yet, but what I do know is that I didn’t expect her to bake. “ _You,_ baked?”

She groaned as she pulled away from the cuddle, “I wish I was…get it, baked…getting high…” she shrugged and gave me _that_ look – you know the one where she thinks she’s being really smart and is proud of herself for the joke. Damn, I’d do anything just to see her always look that proud of herself. Her tone lowered back to her usual. “Waves baked, Haught and I decorated”.

She tucked some hair behind my ear, she kept her hand wrapped on the nape of my neck as she whispered. “Mine’s the one with no roof, Haught ate it”. I couldn’t see her face, but I know by her words’ emphasis she must’ve rolled her eyes so damn hard and that there was a little white lie embedded in her statement.

I laid my hand on top of hers, to still the light trembling of pale fingers. “Can we go inside then? I want to see this roofless house you’ve built and you’re about to turn to ice.”.

We left the porch, Wynonna exaggerated stretching her legs whilst she made ungodly noises as she shook out the pins and needles. I’ll never get tired of seeing her in the skin tight leather pants, they hug every part of her just right. I gave into temptation and slapped both hands onto her ass (you can’t blame me), “Just making sure your butt isn’t too numb”. I winked before I realised, she couldn’t see me but the tone was enough to insinuate flirting.

“Babe”. I watched how she flushed herself against the front door, out of arms reach. She looked so cocky, the way her tongue darted out of her mouth like a child. I still can’t believe I found someone who can throw back the same energy I give. “We have to make it through arts and crafts, I promised her. And now I promise _you_ that I’ll make it all worth your while”.

Her blue eyes stood out against the dark wood of the homestead; I couldn’t help but swallow hard as my cheeks pooled with heat.

I guess I never responded to what she’d said, instead she dopily smiled at me and grasped at one of my hands. “C’mon, I thought you wanted to see my _masterpiece_ ”.

** *End of POV* **

* * *

“Are those fucking tampons?” Rosita mimicked the same whisper Wynonna had done earlier on the porch.

“Don’t”, she scoffed shaking her head with her arms wrapped around the shorter woman.

Nicole held the unreliable ladders sturdy for Waverly as she took the last step to reach the top of the unlit tree. The red-head turned to face the couple whilst still having a secure grip on the metal, “She’s protective of that little angel”. She popped her eyebrow, enough to say ‘don’t question it any further’. The eldest woman closed her mouth again as she realised, she had nothing more to add.

Without turning around, she spoke aloud, “You know I can still hear you guys from up here? Besides I was little and I had two older sisters-” she focused her glare on Wynonna. “…Who didn’t tell me about these interesting contraptions”

Wynonna shrugged off the stare, she moved her weight off one foot to the other and huffed, “It’s hardly a contraption. You just shove it up there”. Once again, she shrugged her shoulder’s as if it wasn’t such a big deal. Though by the looks of the younger girls in the room who both darted a scowl at her, she’d regretted her choice of words. 

Rosita’s small frame shook in Wynonna’s hug as she laughed at her explanation. The older woman craned her neck as far as possible to look at Wynonna who had her chin resting on her shoulder, “I kinda guess it was when she was younger”.

“ThankYOU Rosita” Waverly exaggerated her words and cut her eyes at her sister in triumph.

Wynonna backhanded Rosita on the arm for giving her sister an excuse. Through gritted teeth, trying to be as subtle as possible she said, “You’re supposed to be on my side?”

The tanned woman simply widened her eyes and raised her shoulders, and replied in the same volume. “What? I’m trying to make a good impression”.

The two fell into a natural short conversation of their own. “When did you care about giving a good impression?”

“Since forever. I just didn’t want you to know how much I really like you”.

“Yeah, yeah”. Wynonna kissed Rosita with more force than she had anticipated. “You’re just trying to wiggle your way back into bed with me?”

Nicole cleared her throat and announced, “WE ARE STILL HERE!”

*Pssh* “Oh please! You two always make googly eyes at each other from across the room, now it’s my turn”.

Waverly chimed in as she finally settled on the way the angel sat on top of the tree, “You said no PDA?”

The red-head turned to Rosita wearing a cocky grin. “And that was rule number one?”

Rosita turned on the spot, somewhat laughing, to face Wynonna. “You gave them rules?”

“Noooo?”, Wynonna lightly shook her head and looked as if she had no clue what they were on about.

The moment was broken as Waverly climbed down, taking each step just as carefully as the last.

“Perfect” she stood in between the tree and Nicole. “Lights…somebody get the lights!” she called out.

Wynonna flicked off the lights, “Camera!”

Nicole picked up the switch for the tree’s lights, “Action?”.

The dimly lit homestead was brought to life with the ‘nearly-white’ Christmas lights that sat neatly between the branches. The golden strands of tinsel reflected the light beautifully. Rosita shuffled next to Waverly a little more as both Wynonna and Nicole took in the view and lazily sang along to ‘Last Christmas’, the brunette reached her arm higher than she’s used to and rested her arm across Nicole’s shoulder’s.

“Are they always like this?”

Waverly nodded her head to confirm Rosita’s thought.

“Wait! Everyone grab your balls”.

Nicole stared Wynonna down, “Earp!”. She raised her hand in front of her to signal her friend to stop before she even got started.

Wynonna’s grin quickly fell as her ‘nearly’ joke was dismantled in one word. Rosita rubbed her back and held back a laugh to comfort the woman.

The group of four hovered over the glitter-covered dining table. Glue, ribbons, paint, anything you can think of was stuck to the table. It’s any wonder Wynonna wasn’t glued to the table with the number of times she ‘accidentally’ spilt the PVA on her hands and not onto the bauble. Rosita made Wynonna’s, Waverly made Nicole’s and vice-versa. They collected their creations and picked a designated area for their own initials to sit on the tree. Granted Waverly was concerned that they wouldn’t be able to tell hers from Wynonna’s, but she relaxed as soon as she saw the abundance of pink Nicole had loaded up onto the plastic sphere, there was no way Rosita would associate Wynonna and pink.

* * *

“Dibs on Haught”, Wynonna practically dropped onto the redhead who was already cocooned up in a few of the many blankets retrieved from Waverly’s room.

“Hey!”, Waverly and Rosita complained in unison as they emerged from the hallway.

“You’re ditching me for firecracker?”

“Hey!” Nicole jumped to her own defence as she hadn’t expected Rosita to jump on the nickname train.

“Nice one”, Wynonna held up her hand from her laying position on the floor. Rosita dropped the rest of the pillows onto the couch and slapped her hand against the paler one for a high-five.

“Sorry?” Rosita shrugged but still had a smile on her face.

Waverly collected her own pillows and comforter from the pile and placed them near the television, “Looks like you’re with me”. She wore a sweet smile, which Rosita appreciated.

Rosita chuckled somewhat nervously, “Looks like we switched girlfriends…”

Wynonna’s laughing ended abruptly, the room fell into silence. Nicole’s eyes searched for Waverly’s hazel ones for some reassurance that she could feel the awkwardness too. The youngest Earp always knew what to do.

She held up two DVD cases, “So, The Grinch or Elf?”

Nicole spluttered out first to help break the tension, “Elf!”

“Ugh, so predictable…what about ‘The nightmare before Christmas’? Have we got that?”

Rosita finished plumping her own pillows and rested her arms on top of one another on the pillow.

“We’ve got what I’m holding, pick one?”, Waverly raised her eyebrows in annoyance to just get it over with.

Rosita took the focus off Wynonna, “I vote for The Grinch”, she rested her chin on the palm of her hand and pulled out her phone from her back pocket.

“I choose Elf too”.

Nicole nudged the older girl, “Non’s, you’ve got the deciding vote or make it a tie”.

Wynonna snuggled down in the fluffy blanket, “Well I would’ve chosen The Grinch”.

Rosita suggested, “Rock, paper, scissors?”

Wynonna threw scissors which cut Waverly’s paper.

“YEAH!!! Scissoring shit is always a good idea”.

Both Nicole and Waverly glared at each other (again) due to Wynonna’s statement.

Rosita mumbled “Noted” as she watched Wynonna do a celebratory dance whilst laying down.

* * *

** 23rd December  **

“Rose, it’s me!”

“I’m in here!”

Rosita was sprawled flat out, in her underwear on top of her bed. Piles of clothes surrounded her body, all of them apparently not good enough for Wynonna.

Her bedroom door opened back.

“Woah! Please don’t say you have nothing to wear”. Mia looked over the masses of material that also covered the floor. “‘Cause that’d be a lie”.

The brunette lazily pushed herself up on her elbows and watched as Mia walked ‘round the outside of the bed, stepping over bra’s being careful to not get caught.

“Watch out for the booby traps down there!”

“Ha ha, very funny” she rolled her eyes. “How does Wynonna deal with you?”

Rosita shuffled herself to the end of her bed and threw her hair up in a bun. “Your guess is as good as mine. Plus, her jokes are just as bad”. She laughed off the comment as Mia joined her on the bed.

“So, this isn’t the look you’re going for then?”, she waved her hands up and down Rosita’s small, toned frame. “I guess it’s a bold move, but they say, confidence is sexy, right?”

“Yeah, no. I’m keeping ‘this’ off public viewing…it’s strictly Wynonna viewing”.

Mia gagged at the comment and instead continued with the rescue mission. “What did you tell her to wear?”

“Something she was comfortable in”, she aimlessly started sifting through the clothes she had already looked through at least a dozen times.

Mia hopped off the bed, “Great! You’ll do the same then. How do you feel about a dress?”

The brunette stopped dead and stared at her friend. “Have you ever seen me in a dress or even a skirt for that matter?”

“Nope. But there’s always a first. Anyways, that wasn’t a no”.

Mia slid up to an almost empty closet. The clothing hangers made an awful squeaking sound that made both women wince. Rosita took no notice of what Mia was actually looking for, instead she switched her attention to the clock above her vanity.

“6:30pm”. She hadn’t realised she’d even spoken out loud until the blonde responded.

“Plenty of time”. She shrugged off any concerns Rosita had about her problem-solving abilities.

20 minutes had passed. The brunette hadn’t moved from her mirror in all that time, but took the occasional glance to see what her friend was doing behind her. Each glance she took, a new item was added to the outfit Mia was putting together. She set down the tube of nude lipstick and rolled her lips together.

Mia’s chirpy voice rose from behind her. She sounded rather pleased with herself – as she should because once again, she pulled through when Rosita needed her the most.

“Right, you…time to get changed”. She wore a cocky smile; she knew the brunette was impressed due to the lack of words. Rosita wasn’t one to fake anything for the sake of another’s feelings, she’d always say what needed to be said. Some would say she was too outspoken – though, in reality, she just knew wanted.

Her deep coffee eyes fell on a satin green skater skirt, her classic fishnet tights and black heels where the ribbon would wrap around her ankle a couple of times.

Mia rested her head on the smaller woman’s shoulder, “You don’t have to say it. I know I’m a miracle worker, I’ll take my payment in a night out – just the two of us, soon”. She pointed at Rosita as she closed the door after her.

* * *

** * 7:25 pm* **

“Accessories!”, the blonde tugged on the door handle and threw the handful of gold jewellery down onto the bed. “Hoops or studs?”

“Hoops”.

At this point it was a team effort, Rosita was clasping her earrings together as Mia was shaking out the beachy, chocolate waves.

“Rings…bracelet…money?”, the blonde swiped some spare cash off the nightstand and posted it into her friend’s bra.

“Oi, watch it”, she quirked an eyebrow as her cold hands made contact with her chest.

Mia, feeling accomplished, stood back to admire her hard work. She dusted her hands off and folded her arms as she let out some hot air. A piercing wolf whistle let rip into the still apartment atmosphere, “If I batted for the same team, I’d take you out on a date myself”.

Rosita shook her head and continued walking to her apartment’s front door as she got a notification that her Uber was 2 minutes out.

The blonde scooped up her own belongings and clicked her tongue, “Knock ‘em dead!” and waved her off.

* * *

“Get off, get off, get off!”, the eldest Earp tried her best to wriggle out of her sister’s reach, as she lapped the kitchen for the nth time and escaped into the hallway.

Waverly stood back and shrunk into herself like a scolded puppy. She couldn’t help herself and inched a little further forward, “Just a little mo-”, she sneakily tried to reach her hand out to straighten out Wynonna’s fly-aways, but was instantly greeted by her hand being swatted away.

“Haught – dog, can you _please_ tell your girlfriend to _leave me alone_!”, the last 3 words were said slowly and exaggerated, purely aimed at Waverly. Wynonna pushed her back against the wall partition from the living room to the main hallway and folded her arms.

Nicole was sat on the couch, oblivious to the chaos behind her since it wasn’t completely unusual for the Earp’s to ‘fight’ with each other. She continued to throw popcorn into the air and catch it – or tried to catch it in her mouth, whilst watching some show about house renovations. It turns out, the red head was determined to help the Earp’s renovate their bedrooms on a low budget.

Wynonna yelped for help like a wounded animal, “NICOLE!”

She snapped out of her trance and dug her knees into the couch cushions and watched the shitshow develop in front of her eyes. “Woah!”, her mouth dropped open in shock.

“Shut it!”, Wynonna cautioned as she shimmied herself away from her little sister who was radiating too much energy. “You better tire her out, while I’m out”

Waverly and Nicole shivered in disgust, “Erggh!”

“Shut up, don’t pretend like that isn’t your plan anyway. And it’s not like you’re exactly quiet…” Wynonna spoke through her teeth, “ _unfortunately_ I know exactly what goes on behind your door”. she shivered at the thought.

Nicole started to form a coherent sentence, “You look –” until she was cut off by a high-pitched ramble of words.

“Beautiful, gorgeous, hot…” Waverly spewed out her thoughts as she admired her sister from across the room.

Wynonna added her two cents and struck a pose, “Sex on legs?”

The smaller brunette and red-head simply stared at the older woman who was now shoving her feet into some thigh high black, velvet boots.

“I was going to say ‘different’, until I was Earp bulldozed. But you look great, Earp”. Nicole raised her eyebrows in shock at the significant change in her best friend’s appearance. The silence didn’t fill the room for long, as the glisten of lights caught Waverly’s eye and lit up the driveway.

“I see headlights…”, Waverly sang out as she was contained by Nicole’s arms wrapped around her petite frame.

Wynonna stood up straight after finishing zipping up her shoes, she pulled her hair around the front of her shoulders and slips on a deep burgundy jacket, which just covered her lacey crop top well enough for it not to be deemed too inappropriate for the current weather climate.

The darker brunette quipped her head around the corner to look through the window that was partially covered with some material Waverly had found from a vintage store a while ago. “Right, you two are staying here”

“Why -”

Waverly was cut off as Wynonna continued talking without considering what the younger girl was going to say. “You don’t need to say ‘hi’, or threaten her not to hurt me…I’m looking at you Haught!”. She half-turned to her friend who simply dismissed the accusation.

“Have a good one!” Nicole lifted one hand away from Waverly’s waist to wave the older girl out of the homestead.

Wynonna was a few steps away from the Uber when her sister called out, “Will you be home?”

The older Earp didn’t even turn around when she called back, “I’ll let you know”.

The silver hatchback’s door popped open as a tanned arm slithered back inside as Wynonna made her approach and disappeared inside.

Even though there was no one in the house apart from herself and Waverly, Nicole still spoke in a hushed tone. “When have you ever seen Wyn in a skirt?

Nicole’s bottom lip popped out a bit as she was still processing seeing Wynonna so glammed up. She knew she was expecting something less Wynonna(ry) and a lot more Waverly(y), but this really caught her by surprise, mostly because her best friend wasn’t one to give up a fight but it was clear Waverly won this battle.

Shaking her head, the smaller girl released herself from her girlfriend’s embrace, “Never”.

“Never?”

“Ever”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can keep in contact with me on Twitter @/deckerscrofano
> 
> Playlists used throughout this fic  
> [ Drowning your demons playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2QliA7qcg6bEtrBL3R8rhT?si=3PfkjN5HS2OC1mQSvHy0lw)  
> [ Wynonna's Playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3Jk2K31UYXNGGsN4RzsshF?si=ot_Cds85SCKiXiunAd6e6Q)   
> [ Waverly's Playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4SDdXZq61xrtHyMcAvJ5l6?si=vCRP14tOTya2FQp7uonkEw)


	10. Waiting for a girl like you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's date night for Wynonna and Rosita.
> 
> Nicole and Waverly are placing bets.

The women walked into the already crowded restaurant. Rosita was in front of Wynonna, leading her in by her hand that was clenched close behind her back as they bypassed the queue for those who hadn’t pre-booked a table.

The harsh light from the overhead lamp illuminated his petite figure hunched over the waiter’s station. He skimmed through numerous receipts as he chewed on the pen lid that fought to stay on the pen itself.

“Jeremy?” Rosita called out to catch his attention. “We spoke on the phone a few days ago. I’m Rosita”, she dropped Wynonna’s hand to take his and acquainted themselves.

Wynonna hadn’t seemed to mind the release of her hand, instead she took in the unfamiliar environment. This wasn’t her usual scene; she’d usually shack up in a dingy bar and hope that no one would trouble her or her whiskey. But this, this was romantic – you know, the cliché movie type shit that you could only ever dream about. Though for Wynonna, it became less ‘cliché’ as she was here not to simply collect Waverly from one of her many dates from back in the day, but instead to have a date of her own. Her blue eyes flitted to all corners of the restaurant, absorbing all of its sights. The way each table was set with a tea light and a simple red rose in the middle, that the Christmas decorations gave a homely vibe. The room was broken up with mahogany tables and chairs, the outskirts of the restaurant was decorated with velvet red booths and a couple of large fish tanks. It was fancy but not uncomfortably fancy.

“Ahh Rosita, great to finally meet you!”, he seemed quite excitable about the encounter since the two didn’t know each other. “It’s a table for two, right?” he slid two menus’ off of his station and slid the pen behind his ear.

The older woman nodded in response and started to follow the black-haired man who wasn’t much older than Wynonna. As Rosita moved between a group of customers, she instinctively reached behind her to grasp onto Wynonna. It’d become a new habit. However, Wynonna wasn’t in tow and instead, she spots her, still in the same spot as where they’d walked in.

The gentle chatter and laughs from the nearby table’s around Wynonna were genuine. It’d felt so long since she had been exposed to other people’s happiness…since she’d learned that happiness wasn’t a myth, or a lie people tell themselves to keep them going for at least another day. The younger woman was brought out of her trance as she felt the soft pad of Rosita’s thumb brush against the back of her hand.

“You okay?”. Rosita could’ve sworn that she saw the deep breath release from Wynonna’s chest.

Almost breathless she responded, “Ro, this place…” she paused not knowing exactly what she was going to say next. “It’s really, really nice”.

“Yeah, it reminded me of you”, she shrugged off the somewhat cringy comment. Wynonna rolled her eyes and smirked at Rosita’s last words. She tried so hard to control the rush of heat that flooded her body.

Rosita circled around the taller girl, “Now c’mon!” and hurried her along towards Jeremy who was already waiting at their booth.

Jeremy handed them their menus, “Any drinks for you ladies tonight?”

Wynonna’s mouth ran dry. She hadn’t thought about alcohol as much these days – she spent most of her time either serving it or being with Rosita, though that didn’t mean she didn’t think of it at all. Daily, she’d consider it – just going to the store and returning with her bottled love…the only love she knew she could always depend on. Of course, Wynonna was an adult now. 18 years old, but still young enough to make mistakes, which she knew she couldn’t afford for Waverly, Rosita, and especially not for herself.

In the background, the pianist strikes up the next song which was ‘Close to you – The Carpenters’. Wynonna got lost in the opening chords that filled the room and drowned out the chatter nearest to her. She hadn’t heard it in a while, though vividly she can still remember the static sounds from the vinyl when she’d entered her Aunt Gus’ and Uncle Curtis’ one of the many times, she and her siblings escaped the war zone which they’d also call home. Her inner voice fills in the missing lyrics to accompany the instrumental. _Why do birds suddenly appear, every time you are near. Just like me they long to be close to you –_

Rosita broke the moment as she slightly kicked Wynonna’s calf under the table to get her attention. Her brows were furrowed as she was still so unsure why the younger woman seemed ‘off’ ever since they entered the restaurant. The darker brunette couldn’t help but worry that ‘this’ was too much for Wynonna. “Drink?”.

Realising that the waiter and Rosita had both been waiting for her answer, Wynonna managed to sputter out. “L – lemonade’s great, thanks”. She snapped shut the drinks menu and held it out to Jeremy as Rosita ordered a coke for herself.

He scribbled down the orders on his tattered notebook and slipped it into his apron as he disappeared towards the bar.

“I’m not expecting you to abstain from alcohol too. I’m a big girl, I can handle the challenges of being faced with liquor – it’s my job after all”. Her hand partially laid across the napkin which enclosed her cutlery, and her fingers started to involuntarily tap across the wooden surface from pinky to thumb and back again. This only illuded to the notion that maybe Wynonna wasn’t handling it as well as she was making it out to be.

The older woman rested her hand on the restless one to still her movements, it caused Wynonna to actually look up from the list of available starters. Her eyes were full of uneasiness. “I know you don’t, you’ve never asked me to. But what’s wrong with a little solidarity?”

Wynonna’s blues settled at Rosita’s selflessness. She glanced back down and she thought she’d gotten away with it until the shorter woman inquired, “Is there anything wrong? You’ve been” she exhaled, “I dunno…not you, ever since we stepped foot into this place”.

“Well…” she let out a breathy chuckle which eased the anxiety she picked up from Rosita’s question. “Can you believe that-”, she leans in across the table and Rosita mimics the same movements. She whispers, “They don’t have chicken nuggets”. They both slumped back against the booth laughing, and their hands naturally drift apart.

“If I knew you were that easy, I would’ve grabbed some nugs from the store”.

“Ahh!”, she feigned taking offense and put her hand across her mouth. “Miss Bustillos. Did you just call me ‘easy’?”

“Oh c’mon!”, she threw her hands in the air like she had just been caught out.

Jeremy returned with a small tray that balanced their drinks and a small bucket of ice and set them down in front of the couple.

* * *

Rosita held her hands over Wynonna’s eyes. Her stomach pressed against the natural curve of the taller woman’s back. They shuffled closer and closer, “A little more, more…” until the older woman steadied Wynonna in one place. “Stop. DON’T OPEN YOUR EYES!”. She warned as she looped her arms down, out, and around the taller stature.

Without hesitation, Wynonna placed two fingers against her temple and saluted. “Yes ma’am!”. Her impatience burned through her core; involuntary tapping of her foot displaced the anxiety of the unknown. Rosita rummaged and rustled through the shrubs that outlined the gateway, but eventually, she hooked her fingers around the handles and hoisted the canvas materials from the greenery. Naturally, Wynonna’s curiosity grew, and she let out a sigh. “I know I’m adventurous, but our first time isn’t going to be in the words, Ro”. With those words, the winter air hugged her body and chilled her partially exposed legs.

The tanned woman had heard Wynonna’s admission and couldn’t help but scoff to herself.

“Ro? I’m going to look if you don’t answer me”, her stubbornness raged through her but she knew this surprise was important to Rosita, and instead, she held back peeling her hands away from her eyes. “Cause I’m not going to stand here…in the dark, when for all I know you could’ve been kidnap-”

Her lilted voice cut Wynonna off, “Okay, open!”. Rosita’s petite frame was drowning in familiar bags. And only then, did Wynonna realise where they were.

“Ro, hate to break it to you. But, the rink is closed”, she tapped her wrist, where a watch would’ve been. She wrung her hands together as she stepped closer to the woman and lifted a bag out of her hands. Rosita slipped the long shoulder strap over her right-side and continued in her stride leaving Wynonna almost lost in the dusk.

The older woman slinked towards the locked double doors and started to somewhat explain herself to Wynonna who was still playing catch-up. “To the public…maybe. Not for us”, she spoke in a low tone, as if the words were caught in her throat as she wiggled the key into the lock. She gave one forceful push against the door to pry them away from their seal.

Her voice getting louder as she entered the building and let the door close behind her. “We’re not breaking and entering, are we?”

Rosita straddled the bench closest to them and dropped her duffel to the floor. “It wouldn’t be the first time though, would it?” Wynonna glared down at her as she was still standing, towering above her.

She blew air through her teeth, “What makes you say that?”

“You forget, I know your type”. She doesn’t look up from lacing her skates.

Wynonna cocked her head to the side, “Yeah, and what’s my type?”

“Besides me?”

Wynonna clicked her tongue at Rosita’s attempt of sarcasm.

“You’re ‘edgy’, so fucking sarcastic…” she shrugs and her eyes wander around the dimly lit rink, “I dunno, maybe a little bit of a cu-”

“HEY!”

“-only when you want to be”, she jokingly winked at the blue eyes that narrowed in offense.

Wynonna pulled out her skates and started to lace them up. She hadn’t moved the whole time Rosita had spent putting on her own. “How’d you even get these?”, she lifted the one white skate in the air to gesture what she meant, before wriggling her foot into it. Rosita continued to unload her duffel bag and answered.

The corners of her mouth curled as she smirked. “Your sister is pretty useful when it comes to surprises”, she couldn’t help but watch as Wynonna’s mouth dropped a little, to take in the rare occasion when the Earp girl didn’t know what to say.

* * *

They’d been skating hand in hand for almost half an hour. Alone in an empty ice rink, granted it was a little eery – looking out to the sides to see darkness settle and fill the vacant seats, which in the daytime would be taken up by the young people from the surrounding towns. Minute by minute the air seemed more brutal to the skin. Even the sweats Rosita had prepared in advance didn’t take the edge off the bitter environment. Wynonna’s hands; pale and almost numb, fumbled her with her phone to slip it out of her jacket’s pocket. Her headphones were still wrapped around it from when she’d left the homestead earlier in the evening. It’d reminded her that she was still to let Waverly know whether she’d be back home or not. She stretched out the wires and skated in front of Rosita to make her come to a gentle stop. “Pop this in?”

Rosita didn’t say anything, she was mostly curious at what the younger woman had planned – since it was her surprise after all. The tips of their fingers brushed against each other as the bud was passed from Wynonna to Rosita. Wynonna placed the right bud into her ear and her thumb pressed the shuffle icon on her playlist she had specifically made for Rosita. Low and behold, the first song that starts was ‘Waiting for a girl like you’.

“Didn’t peg you for a Foreigner listener?”

Wynonna held her finger against her own lips and Rosita didn’t question it any further. She interlocked her fingers once again with the tanned woman’s, Wynonna skated backwards and Rosita watched in adoration.

_‘So long I’ve been looking too hard, I’ve been waiting too long’._

Rosita’s hands fell comfortably around Wynonna’s neck and the wires hung between them almost poetically. White figure skate against black hockey skate – _there’s probably something symbolic about this if you look close enough_ , but Wynonna was purely focused on the way Rosita’s fly-away hairs laid against her mascara ladened eyelashes and the way the other woman subtly tried to blow the hair off her glossed lips. The pads of Wynonna’s hands; pruned with the cold brushed across the warmth of Rosita’s cheekbone and down her jawline which shifted the rogue strand of hair. In response, Rosita smiled with gratitude since she remembered not to speak during the song.

 _‘It feels so right, so warm and true. I need to know if you feel it too’_.

Rosita’s body naturally relaxed in Wynonna’s embrace as her hands held onto her hips that little bit tighter, which brought them almost flush to each other. The youngest woman took the lead which guided Rosita’s footing in between her own and allowed the tanned woman to rest her head on Wynonna’s chest. Soft, coffee brown locks bundled up against the taller girl’s chin and the scent of cherry blossoms engulf her once again. She couldn’t help but be transported back to the moment of climbing onto the back of the Harley, the same moment she knew Rosita was going to be everything except ordinary. Then again, Earp knew this when she didn’t back down at their first encounter- when she didn’t run away or treat her as broken cargo at the mention of her less than average childhood.

As the song came to its end, Rosita pulled away from the embrace, which pulled Wynonna out of her mind and stopped the playlist. The blues were foggy, nearly absent but still present enough to fully embody the silent moment of intimacy. The fog cleared when plumper lips pushed against thinner ones that had lost their cosmetic tint, for a long, laboured, sensual kiss. Rosita’s intentions spoke more than actual words. Their breathlessness gave each other air.

* * *

Waverly’s phone buzzed a few times on the coffee table before she pulled herself away from the comfort of Nicole.

“You win”, she huffed and dug into the back pocket of her jeans to pull out $5. Nicole held out her hand with a smirk.

“I can’t believe I know your sister better than you”.

Waverly slumped back after typing out a quick reply to Wynonna.

“Well…she’s your best friend, of course, you’d know that she’d choose to stay with her girlfriend”.

“Waves, they haven’t even labeled it yet”. The redhead folded up the note and slid it into her breast pocket of her red flannel. Once again, opening her arms up to welcome the smaller girl into them.

She breathed out, “but we all have eyes, we know what it is…basically”. She purposely wrapped Nicole’s free arm around her body. “Anyway, we have the place to ourselves…” the sides of her mouth rose with the insinuation and caressed her fingers along Nicole’s thighs which grabbed her attention immediately off the cooking show they were watching.

Waverly’s hand was met with a larger one that held her hand in place on her leg. “It finishes in 10, then we can go”, she popped an eyebrow at her girlfriend who already seemed far too fidgety.

“Ugh, deal!” she continued to mumble, “Can’t believe you’re choosing to watch tv instead of sex?” she pouted.

“Uhhm, it’s the final. Plus, we’ve been watching this for months, I’m not missing it now”, the taller woman shrugged as she retrained her eyes on the blue light radiating from the tv screen.

* * *

Barely keeping their hands off of each other, they raced up several flights of stairs, stumbling over the majority of them and taking in the views of each other’s asses as they overtook the lead. They reached the apartment door which for the life of her, Rosita couldn’t manage to get the key into the lock as Wynonna’s hands explored her body under the layers of clothes. Wynonna knew what she was doing, she could hear the way Rosita was mumbling out for her to let her get the door open first and the way her breath hitched when slim fingers reached across her neck. It’s not like they haven’t shared a bed with each other before, but it was the first night they were going to share all of each other together.

Eventually, the door unlatched and slipped away from the door frame allowing the couple to fall into the quiet atmosphere which absorbed the high-pitched squeals as they sloppily b-lined towards the bedroom.

Rosita burst through her bedroom door first. The doorknob banged into the off-white painted wall (sure to leave a mark); it couldn’t bounce back as it was quickly greeted by Wynonna’s back being slammed against it as the older woman took over in power. In between kisses, the laboured breaths from both women made it sound as if there was no oxygen left for them.

Wynonna peeled herself away first as it was clear she couldn’t casually kick off her shoes as Rosita had done during their heated make-out session which hadn’t gotten them any closer to the bed. The shorter woman shimmied out of her jacket, Rosita could barely make out where the clothing catastrophe started and ended which she and Mia had left from earlier on. Trying to regain her breath she pretended to have some composure and started to swipe the remnants of rejected outfit choices off the bed. She profusely apologised about the mess to Wynonna who was already silently cursing Waverly for being so insistent on these thigh-highs for being completely impractical for this very reason.

Wynonna captured the smaller woman and pinned her against the bed, straddling her hips to assert dominance. This (being their first sexual experience together) meant that the taller girl was laying some ground rules. In her day-to-day life she’s guarded, blunt…abrupt even, however when she’s with Rosita those walls come tumbling down. She isn’t that person everyone assumes her to be – broken. She’s passionate, fiery…knows exactly what she wants, and ever since she laid eyes on Rosita, that’s who she wanted. 

The younger woman coiled her fingers around Rosita’s bra strap that peaked out from under her emerald green dress. For a few moments she didn’t speak, it wasn’t long enough to make things weird but long enough for Wynonna to go over what she wanted to say and to possibly prepare her for what the response may be. Granted, there’s no label to what they have, but this is Wynonna’s and Rosita’s ‘official’ date night. Wynonna opened up completely to Rosita, to see all the ugly truths of her life, so the possibility of it all falling apart once she sleeps with her, terrifies Wynonna. 

“Are you sure?”

The older woman seemed taken aback by the question, her eyebrows knitted together in confusion and her lips parted as her jaw became slack. Wynonna instantly picked up on the change in Rosita’s demeanour – had she read it all wrong?

“Wyn, of fucking-course I’m sure. I was sure _all_ the way up here”, she lightly joked but could truly see that in Wynonna’s eyes, she was being serious. Rosita’s hands interlocked together behind Wynonna’s back and pulled her down on top of her and dragged her into a searing kiss. Again, the couple parted.

“I’m serious Ro, y – you’re sure?”

With sincerity, she smiled as she gave her consent.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Playlists for this fic
> 
> [ Drowning your demons playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2QliA7qcg6bEtrBL3R8rhT?si=3PfkjN5HS2OC1mQSvHy0lw)  
> [ Wynonna's Playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3Jk2K31UYXNGGsN4RzsshF?si=ot_Cds85SCKiXiunAd6e6Q)   
> [ Waverly's Playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4SDdXZq61xrtHyMcAvJ5l6?si=vCRP14tOTya2FQp7uonkEw)  
> [ For Ro xx ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7H5CBQnq9103KIGXfubh5Z?si=KFTeHa80RxuqxYsxsqLnUw)


	11. My sister's keeper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the night after Wynonna and Rosita spent the night 'together'.
> 
> The sister's take to the ice but someone keeps them on edge  
> -  
> Here's the playlist's I use for inspiration:  
> [ Drowning your demons playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2QliA7qcg6bEtrBL3R8rhT?si=3PfkjN5HS2OC1mQSvHy0lw)  
> [ Wynonna's Playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3Jk2K31UYXNGGsN4RzsshF?si=ot_Cds85SCKiXiunAd6e6Q)   
> [ Waverly's Playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4SDdXZq61xrtHyMcAvJ5l6?si=vCRP14tOTya2FQp7uonkEw)

With her skates in one hand and her purse in the other, Wynonna nudged the taxi door shut with her ass and dropped some change; that she’d managed to salvage into the driver’s hand.

“Have a good one”. She would’ve raised her hand to acknowledge the man’s departure but instead, she was weighed down by her belongings. Wynonna turned on her heels and carefully trod through the snow that was quickly becoming more and more like ice. The brunette dropped her skates on the porch to her left and foraged for her housekey in the depths of her pockets. Wynonna didn’t exactly know the time since her phone had died in the early hours of this morning but she knew it was still considered morning as the sun had just _barely_ passed the horizon.

The homestead was still - nothing much was going on as she was greeted with darkness and the usual lingering smell of smoke from the fireplace. She closed the door gently, hoping not to wake up the girls.

“Is this what they’d consider the walk of shame?”

Wynonna grappled her chest as if she was making sure her heart was still in her chest and flicked the switch near the doorway Waverly rolled her eyes and glared at where she’d remembered Nicole’s silhouette to be.

“Jesus fucking Christ, Haught!!”, she was greeted with Nicole’s smug face and Waverly who looked as if she was ready to hear everything.

The oldest girl huffed as she studied their expressions. Directing her attention to Nicole she questioned, “Have you _not_ got a home to go to? _And_ by the way, I have no shame…” she hung up her jacket and unzipped the shoes that caused her way too much grief. Her voice struggled as she pulled her other foot out of the heels, “…Only game”, she knew exactly how to get under their skin and gestured with her two fingers parted into a ‘V’ and stuck her tongue between them.

“Wynonnaaaa - ” her baby sister grimaced and sank down into her seat, squeezing her eyes shut. She rubbed her hands from her cheeks downwards, which inevitably stretched her face in distress. Waverly tried her best to remove ‘that’ image from the forefront of her mind.

Instead, the redhead congratulated the darker brunette with a high-five as she plonked down on the couch between them. “You finally got laid, tell me _everything_ ”. Nicole readjusted her position on the couch, as Waverly squirmed at the idea of hearing the technical details about her sister’s sex life.

Wynonna hadn’t even had a chance to splurge the details when the youngest shot up from her sitting position and gestured that she was going upstairs. Both girls acknowledged her disappearance but got right back to business.

“Haught”, Wynonna kicked her legs up into criss-cross apple sauce.

“If I knew hockey players could be _that_ flexible…I – I would’ve tried to bed the team by now”, Wynonna joked as she replayed the images in her mind of last night’s encounter. Nicole’s eyes widened at the admission as she watched how Wynonna reveled in genuine happiness.

“No, but seriously…I’ve only had 3 hours sleep…3!!”, she emphasised her words by waving three fingers in front of Nicole’s face. In a hushed tone, she continued, “She has an infinite…” Wynonna’s eyes practically rolled “…amount of stamina”. She raked her fingers through the messy curls whilst she smiled to herself.

“Well, Earp”. Nicole slapped a firm hand on Wynonna’s knee. “I’m glad you enjoyed yourself”, she pointed her eyes to her friend that was already digging in her back pocket for her phone. “But I hope you haven’t worn yourself for the show tonight? Is she coming to watch?”

Wynonna kicked her feet up onto the coffee table. “Shit!” The blue light from her phone barely reflected against the pale skin of her chin whilst she scrolled through her messages.

“Guessing you haven’t asked yet?”

She cut her eyes at Nicole who had taken the words right from out of her mouth.

“C’mon Wynonna!” the redhead’s words dragged out from the back of her throat. “You just sealed the deal with her after how long and you haven’t considered asking your girlfriend to watch you skate at the Christmas show?”

Wynonna’s glare could’ve burnt the side of her best friend’s head. “Haught, shut it!” she warned in all defensiveness and shifted in her seat with unease. “I don’t know how to manoeuvre relationships. She probably doesn’t even want to have to watch some dumb performance…anyway she’s not even my girlfriend yet”.

“Yet?”

A sweet voice infiltrated the conversation between the two.

“Oh, so you’re eavesdropping?”, Wynonna didn’t move from her position as she suddenly got interested in whatever tv show Nicole had landed on whilst skimming the channels.

A light pitter-patter of feet skipped down the stairs and the petite girl stood behind the couch desperately waiting, so much so she spat out the words that she’d been holding from the top of the stairs. “YET?” she repeated. “Are you going to ask her soon? When? Where?”

Both Nicole and Wynonna looked at each other with some concern that she might pop a blood vessel.

“Baby girl, there’s some things I’m just not going to tell you…this is one of those things”. Waverly pouted at the thought of not being in the know.

Nicole rested her hand on the back of Waverly’s that was harshly gripping onto the couch, “Think of it as a surprise”.

Wynonna scoffed and nudged her little sister, “C’mon, you love surprises!”.

Her face softened, “That _is_ true”.

Wynonna hopped off the couch.

“Anyways Wynonna, how’d you know Rosita doesn’t want to watch you skate? I’m sure she wouldn’t want to miss out”, Nicole shrugged.

The older Earp considered this and briefly remembered the text messages Rosita had sent her the first time she had watched her at practice. Her body filled with a wave of anxiety; she’d been skating for years so she knew that wasn’t the problem. The issue laid within having someone finally in the stands to watch her – she’s never had that before.

“I’ll give her a call”, she smiled at the lovebirds who were now hovering in the kitchen, looking for the collection of takeaway flyers. “Oh”, Wynonna retraced a few steps. “If you’re ordering anything, get me some grub too, thanks!”

The darker brunette retreated to her room and called Rosita.

* * *

Waverly and Nicole reserved a third seat for Rosita since Wynonna had made it clear that the older woman jumped at the chance to see her perform.

“God, where is she?”, Waverly’s leg was bouncing uncontrollably in nervousness for Wynonna, because even though her sister wouldn’t admit it – this was a big deal for her, and for Rosita not to show, would do damage she doesn’t think Wynonna would be able to handle right now.

Nicole’s rested her hand on her girlfriend’s restless limb. Even she kept her eyes fixated on the front doors.

Wynonna was sat across the room looking into her compact mirror, as she wiped a smudge of lipstick off of her chin. She couldn’t help but glance out of the side of her eye, across the rink that was illuminated in cool white lights. She laid her eyes on her sister and Nicole but instantly felt her stomach drop seeing the empty seat to the right of Waverly. A fleeting thought of doubt crept into her mind; _how could I be so stupid?_ Instead, this translated into an utterance of “Bustillos, where the _fuck_ are you?” The curse word seethed at the tip of her tongue.

“Earp!”

The brunette’s head snapped in Coach Johnson’s direction. Which, _thank God_ pulled Wynonna out from dwelling on Rosita’s absence, especially right before she went on the ice. The last thing she needed was to be off her game.

“Remember, these are the big leagues – your first year with the seniors. The judges are pretty unforgiving. So, make sure to spot whilst spinning – you don’t need any more stumbles”.

She scoffed and shook her head at how her coach remembered every mistake. “That was one time!”, Wynonna huffed as she checked in once again to see if Rosita had turned up.

“It only takes one accident or mistake or whatever you want to call it, to land you in a hospital or for you to be penalised”. Coach wasn’t dumb, she could see how Wynonna’s demeanour had completely shifted - she must’ve felt like she was being lectured, accordingly, she brought it to a close.

“Wynonna?”, she spoke in a low volume which took Wynonna by surprise and refocused her attention. The shorter woman who is probably in her late 50’s, used both pointer fingers and pulled her own cheeks up, “Smile and good luck out there!” both eyebrows raised with sincerity before she walked back to the side-lines.

“Please welcome to the ice, contestant number 11 – Wynonna Earp, skating to ‘Hallelujah’ – Alexandra Burke”, the announcer introduces her over the tannoy which boomed across the room.

“She’s here”, Nicole squeezed Waverly’s thigh and Waverly breathed out a sigh of relief, whilst watching to see if Wynonna had realised Rosita had kept her word.

Instead, the older Earp was fixated on keeping her breath steady and her nerves in check. She counted in her head, ‘ _In, 2, 3 and out, 2, 3’_. She clicked the tips of her skates’ blades against the side of the rink like she had always done as some sort of ritual and took her place on the ice.

In a final attempt to search the crowd, the spotlight made her squint and brought unbearable heat with it, both her forehead and nose started to bead with sweat. Inevitably her anxiety lessened when she locked eyes with Rosita who was already taking her seat. Somehow – even though the trio was rows and rows behind a sea of heads of family members for the skaters not only from Purgatory but also the surrounding towns – it seemed to be fate that at this moment, both women were looking for each other.

“Thank fuck I didn’t miss her”, the older woman whispered to the duo who were already giving her daggers.

“Where were you?”, hazel eyes seemed to look Rosita up and down as if she was waiting for a reason on why she was late to their agreed meet-up time.

Nicole’s glare was cold – kinda had her feeling as if she had been completely wrong about this pairing. The red-head couldn’t help but jump to the conclusion that she didn’t take this moment seriously, and the last thing she wanted for Wynonna is to be let down by another person she lets into her life.

Rosita half laughed. “Ease up Red. Wyn was right, I should be more scared of you…seriously though, you guys thought I would be a no show?”.

“I’m not scary” Nicole scowled causing the skin between her brows to crinkle. She directed her attention to Waverly, “Am I scary?”

Waverly shook her head to dismiss Nicole as this wasn’t the time.

“My bike gave out about 15 minutes away, I had to negotiate the ice _and_ run here”. Rosita’s eyes seemed to plead with the girls next to her.

Nicole relaxed her shoulders, “That’s a pretty good excuse”.

“You’re here, that’s the main thing”, Waverly gave a reassuring smile to the older woman who was sliding her ringer to silent.

The first lyrics of Hallelujah started to play, which prompted Wynonna to begin her performance.

_I heard there was a secret chord,_

Her right skate drew a half-circle in the ice as she uncrossed from her starting position.

_That David played, and it pleased the Lord,_

_But you don’t really care for music, do ya?_

_Well, it goes like this,_

_The fourth, the fifth._

She had only just started but Wynonna already had the audience practically eating out of the palm of her hands as she floated around the rink through her step sequence.

_The minor fall and the major lift,_

_The baffled king composing hallelujah._

She spread her arms out and then pushed with her toe-pick into the ice to turn herself in the opposite direction. Wynonna pushed her feet hard against her skates and the ice to push herself up into a leap, once she landed on the opposite foot when she came out of the flip jump, she stretched the other leg out behind her.

Clapping ensued from the audience, which subtly added an undertone for the quieter moments of the song.

_Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah_ _…_

Coach Johnson was almost pressed against the safety glass as she closely watched Wynonna’s footwork. If any mistakes were made, she knew the judges would easily pick them up.

The trio slightly leaned upwards -nearly hovering off their seats to catch every part of Wynonna’s performance.

 _‘C’mon Earp, you got this’_. Wynonna pep-talked herself as she eyed the far, left corner of the rink that was quickly approaching, that’s where her final advanced element would take place as part of her spin sequence; the flying camel spin, into an axel spin and finishing with the advanced backspin.

_Maybe there’s a God above,_

_But all I’ve ever learned from love_

_Was how to shoot somebody who outdrew ya._

_And it’s not a cry that you hear at night,_

_It’s not someone who’s seen the light_

_It’s a cold and broken hallelujah._

Rosita was mesmerised. She’d seen Wynonna at practice many-a-times, but this was different. She could see every muscle in her limbs flex and relax with each spin and jump. But her smile…that smile was breath-taking. Wynonna’s dimples on full display, capturing everyone’s attention in the same way she has always captivated Rosita. Wynonna’s red dress did her all the favours. Perfectly falling around her hips and exposing a tasteful amount of thigh, the illusion neckline fit snuggly and outlined her bust giving Wynonna more of a visible cleavage than usual. The clear rhinestones exquisitely complimented her complexion under harsh. It was the first time, even at this distance, Rosita had ever taken in the beauty of Wynonna’s slender neck. For the first time it was revealed – her hair was sleeked into a bun, just like Waverly’s was. It’s an educated guess that she simply couldn’t keep her hair down for such intricate spins.

Coach silently celebrated once Wynonna landed her spin combination of 12 revolutions without a stumble in sight.

_Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah_

_Hallelujah_

Chest heaving, lungs recovering, Wynonna soaked up the roaring cheers and hollers surrounding her. No matter how many times she performs, she never gets over the praise she seems to get – it’s the only time she’s ever been celebrated.

* * *

Both Earp sisters stood at the side of the rink as they waited for the performance to finish.

Wynonna spun Waverly around to face her, “How we feeling, babygirl?”

She laughed at the question, “Non’s, I’m fine…I think _you’re_ more nervous than _me_?”

“Ugh yeah, my little sister’s first show”. The younger girl’s smile grew out of pure excitement. “Of course, I’m nervous” Wynonna clutched Waverly’s hands into her own “But, I’m also super excited for you. The buzz is unreal”.

The shorter girl opened her mouth, ready to speak but was indirectly cut off as a high-pitched whistle came from the overhead speaker as the tannoy sounded. “Please welcome to the ice, contestant number 14 – Waverly Earp, skating to ‘Let’s stay inside’ – Adaline”.

Waverly’s hands slipped from Wynonna’s as she stepped closer to the ice. The older girl watched on as she skated off and entered the spotlight in the center of the rink. All eyes were on her baby sister.

Wynonna cupped her hands around her mouth and called out, “GOODLUCK!”.

In response, an uncontrollable smile broke from Waverly’s freshly painted pink lips. Wynonna couldn’t help but feel the immense sense of achievement, getting to this moment – even after all the hardship she had faced, she still got to do what she loved with who she loved.

_Oh, love you, love you, love you more each year_

_They could strip away the cheer_

_I’d still be standing here._

_You gave me, gave me, gave me the greatest gift,_

_I can strike it off the list,_

_I no longer need to wish._

From where Wynonna, Rosita, and Nicole were seated, Waverly looked like a dot practically engulfed in the vast white surrounding her. Her dress almost blending in with the ice, though the sequins outlined her short stature as she glided around the perimeter. Waverly nailed the salchow jump, no more than a minute into the routine.

“She looks confident that’s good, right?”

“Spice-rack, she’s fine. Look at that smile…take a breath, please”. Wynonna massaged Nicole’s nearest shoulder in the hope to forcefully make her relieve some tension she was harbouring.

Rosita’s hand was already clasped together with Wynonna’s whilst she watched Waverly be more than competent on the ice. She hadn’t noticed Nicole had even said anything or that Wynonna had responded.

_Won’t stop snowing today_

_So, you should stay here for a while_

_No sense going away_

_So, pray it stays this cold all year…_

Waverly was nearing the end of her routine; all she had left was a spin sequence. Everyone was nervous for her because it’s one thing to do 6+ revolutions, but to land them is another thing. Coach Johnson held her breath since she more than anyone knows that the beginners often underestimate the importance of spotting and continuing to focus on that specific area in the room.

The ‘upright spin’ Her right arm leads the initial movement so her right leg follows, then she centers the spin on one foot, tucking both arms in tight to her chest. That’s it, the easiest was out of the way, next was the ‘sit spin’.

_Cause you thrill me, thrill me, thrill me, like no one else._

_It’s the best I’ve ever felt –_

The music cuts with an abrupt end and everything fell flat. A piercing shriek rippled from Wynonna’s rubied lips.

“WAVERLY!!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!!


	12. Old habits die hard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wynonna battles with herself, Rosita tends to her 'wounds'.

The crowd collectively gasped and grimaced as Waverly’s ankle buckled beneath her and she fell straight to the floor. The trio leapt from their seats and tried to see the damage. Nicole and Rosita froze in place. But Wynonna, Wynonna’s heartbeat was felt in her throat and her legs jumped into action.

Wynonna kicked off her blade protectors and hopped straight onto the ice, completely disregarding her coach who was already calling for her to let the medics go on and tend to Waverly. The older Earp hadn’t meant to ignore her, but all she could hear was Waverly screaming in pain. That deafened her more than being subjected to the speakers that had been pumping out music all night, she knew she was going to be by her sister’s side no matter what.

* * *

** 7pm **

Both Nicole and Wynonna sat opposite each other with an empty chair at the head of the oval ‘meeting’ table. The redhead hadn’t sat still long enough to even take in the new environment. Wynonna couldn’t help but scrunch her nose at the sterile environment – y’know, that classic hospital smell. She knew it would cling to them long after they leave the premises, she was already fantasising about being back on the homestead, back to safety.

The door behind the women opened and shut before either of them looked in its direction. A dark-haired woman took her place at the head of the table but remained standing, as Nicole stood first, shortly followed by an absent-minded Wynonna.

She held out her hand, “Dr. Pressman” she easily smiled since it was clear that the room was close with anxiety and guilt.

Nicole minimised the space between herself and the doctor by accepting the handshake, “Nicole Haught”, the redhead noticed the slight crinkle in the doctor’s forehead. She clarified, “I’m Waverly’s girlfriend”. Nicole pulled her hand away – probably a little more hastily than she had intended once she remembered she was still shaking this woman’s hand.

Wynonna continued to scan the room, just to keep her mind busy like she had done several times since they had entered. Nicole studied her friend; she had seen Wynonna on ‘off days’ but not like this.

The younger girl cleared her throat, “Wynonna?”

She looked like a deer in headlights, glaring at the redhead and finally noticing the golden-brown glow just below her eye line. Wynonna heaved her hand from her leather jacket’s pocket and introduced herself to the woman.

“Waverly has a slight concussion, but after reviewing her x-ray, it looks like a bimalleolar ankle fracture…”

Without looking up from her clasped hands, she asked “And, in English?”

“Part of her fibula and tibia are broken”. She looks between both women. “She’ll need surgery to realign her bones. Are you with me?”

The older girl pushed her brow up and down to acknowledge the question, whereas Nicole verbally responded.

“Good. So, the surgery I’ll be performing is called an open reduction and internal fixation. Basically, it’ll realign her bones by inserting metal rods, plates, and screws to keep them together so that they heal properly”.

Wynonna’s eyes squeezed shut and her lips sealed closed and pulled to the side as she grimaced at the doctor’s words. She placed both her palms against the table between herself and it, then extended her arms fully to untuck her chair.

As she stood up, she blurted out, “I can’t do this, right now!”.

Brown eyes followed Wynonna as she disappeared out the door and walked past the window just ahead of Nicole. The redhead knew that she wasn’t going to be the one to stop her, not now – not when Wynonna’s angry with herself.

“Will she be okay?” 

In response, Nicole nodded and clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth, “How long will it take to heal?”

“Well, she’s a young, healthy girl, so I’m hoping for no more than 12 weeks. However, she will need physiotherapy, even after the healing period. But I’ll be calling her in regularly for x-rays to check where we are in her recovery process”.

* * *

A few hours had passed, Nicole hadn’t left Waverly’s side even though her girlfriend drifted in and out of consciousness as she was slowly recovering from her concussion when the back of her head hit the ice. She scrolled back and forth on all her social media’s, casually swiping a little faster when she saw the same posts several times already whilst she made use of idle hands. Nicole sent out 6 different messages to Wynonna. But now, now she was impatient and frankly a little pissed at her disappearing act. Nicole’s thumbnail briefly made contact with the glass screen and pressed onto the older girl’s number and tried calling her. Unsurprisingly she was sent straight to voicemail.

Without looking up from the blue light illuminating where she was sitting, she mumbled under her breath, “Typical…where are you Earp?”

A light but still groggy voice slurred her question, “No…” she licked her lips in an attempt to moisten them. “Answer?”

Brown eyes flicked up, “Baby…”

Nicole slipped her phone into her flannel’s breast pocket and took Waverly’s hand into her own. Her eyes wandered over the petite figure that was somewhat rigid in the hospital bed. “How’s the head…God, how’s the leg. You’ve done a number on it”. A laugh slipped past her lips, maybe subconsciously she tried to make it sound less daunting for the sake of her girlfriend.

“Ahh, you know”, Waverly shrugged. “Could be better”, she gave the same energy back to the other girl who looked at her as if she was made of glass. “Please, don’t look at me like that, it was an accident, I’ll be better before you know it”. Her smaller hand comforted Nicole as the younger girl wasn’t oblivious to the worry that seemed to escape from the redhead’s gaze.

A side smile pulled at Nicole’s mouth, whilst pale hands encapsulated her own and guided her towards Waverly who was clearly gesturing, with pursed lips, for a kiss.

* * *

The rainfall was non-stop since Wynonna left for her go-to liquor store. The clerk had made a passing comment about how her trips had become more and more infrequent. The Earp girl caught the tail end of what may have been a compliment or a simple observation, but in her guilt-ridden state of mind, she took it as a knife to the chest. Realising that once again, she was ready to greet her demons at the neck of a bottle and drown any memory of them.

“I walk”, the tip of the bottle pressed against bright pink, cold lips. “A lonely roooooad!”.

Wynonna’s combat boots near enough dragged two paces behind her, which kicked up the slushy snow and stained the fake leather material of her boots with a white outline. Again, the whiskey bottle she was cradling met with her mouth and she sighed with relief as the warmth of the liquor pooled in her stomach after trailing down her esophagus.

“God, what’s next”, she spoke aloud to no one – she was alone on the street, the only thing accompanying her was the distant sounds of tyres making their way through 2-day old snow.

She looked like a typical drunk to anyone who didn’t know her. She was slurring her sentences and incoherently asked several questions to shadows in the distance. Her obnoxious singing spoke volumes – she needed someone. ‘Cause, she really tried to be better for Waverly…to prove to herself that she didn’t have to fill the void with alcohol anymore. Rosita had been the main cause for her success, she never made her feel guilty when she did ‘slip-up’ here and there but Rosita was there to make sure Wynonna got back on the horse.

And now, now Rosita wasn’t here – when the ambulance came for Waverly, Wynonna completely ignored Nicole and Rosita. The eldest Earp forced her way into the back to be with her baby sister who ended up quickly losing consciousness and Nicole was left with Rosita, redundant and shell shocked in the parking lot – while the ambulance departed and left them in near enough complete darkness.

Wynonna wallowed in her guilt and consoled herself with her oldest friend – though it probably should be considered a foe. 

“…The only one that I have ever known”. She celebrated remembering the lyrics, by extending her arm in front of her and pulling it back to her side.

Wynonna turned the corner to the hospital and trashed the near-empty bottle in the shrubbery. Her hair was soaked, darker than usual. Wet strands stuck to her neck and cheeks, though she lazily attempted to loosen them from her skin. Her leftover mascara from her performance earlier on, fell down her face like dirt tracks and the worn red lipstick was smeared towards her chin from the whiskey bottle.

It was dark and pretty uneventful up ahead – but then again Wynonna could barely put one foot in front of the other, so there’s no telling in what she was seeing was true or not but she immediately recognised Nicole’s car, which sat underneath a streetlight. A smoke cloud spewed from the passenger’s open window, and a pair of familiar Doc’s rested on the door, where the window would come up.

Blue eyes forced themselves to fixate on the vehicle as she slurred, “Bustillos!!”

The feet retracted from where they were propped up and she sat up from her slouched position. “Wynonna?”

Rosita pushed the car door open and stood to the right of it, resting her arm on top of the door as she watched Wynonna come to a pause in front of her. The familiar smell of ‘past’ Wynonna sat in the back of Rosita’s throat, near enough choking on the scent. Raindrops beaded off her tanned shoulders and raced each other down her upper arms.

“Whiskey?” she spoke to herself in a hushed tone and flicked her cigarette onto the floor, “Where the fuck have you been?”

“I don’t need…” she took in a deep breath whilst finding her words. “This right now”. Wynonna’s eyes rolled and she stepped away from the shorter woman, Rosita’s reaction was to grab onto the drenched denim sleeve to stop the younger woman in her tracks.

“I know, but you can’t go in there like this. C’mon!”. Rosita gently tugged Wynonna in her direction and sat her in the passenger seat, whilst she got into the driver’s side.

The older woman clicked on the light switch on the roof of Nicole’s car, so she could at least see Wynonna even in this crappy, yellow low-light. A sinking feeling of despair niggled at her heartstrings for seeing Wynonna like this. Rosita had always been warned about this, by Wynonna herself but she’d never experienced it until now. She popped open the glovebox and scavenged for some clean napkins.

“C’mere”. The tanned woman took Wynonna’s chin between her fingers to get her wandering eyes to look at her. She wrapped the tissue over her finger and cleaned up the disheveled makeup.

Throughout this ordeal, Wynonna had been continuously mumbling but nothing was understood by Rosita. However, she had finally managed to force out the only question she had.

“What…are you, doing…Rose?” her words barely coherent.

“Just looking after you, Wyn”

“Don’t need looking after”. Wynonna pulled away from Rosita who had slightly turned her back to wedge the tissue in the pocket of the door.

She wasn’t going to argue with a drunk Wynonna, so for an easier conversation, she simply responded with an understanding smile.

* * *

** 10pm **

It’d been no more than 90 minutes since both Wynonna and Rosita settled down in the car. After some convincing, Wynonna allowed herself to relax and she nestled into Rosita’s arms to try and get some rest, and sleep off her intoxication. Shorter arms trailed its fingers up and down, the now dry, cooled pale skin – it’d become something Rosita did out of habit to relax Wynonna on her bad days.

She cleared her throat, which had only gotten drier since she put on the heating. “Wyn”

“Hmm”, right now she was more hungover than drunk.

Rosita spoke quietly to allow Wynonna to adjust to her voice. “Nicole messaged to say that they need you to give permission for Waverly’s surgery since you’re her guardian. You up for that?”

Wynonna kicked her now dry combat boots off of the dashboard. “I’m guessing I can’t really say no…tell Haught we’ll be in, in 5”.

* * *

** 25th December 2017 **

** 11am **

Nicole and Wynonna were sat on either side of a recovering Waverly while Rosita had left (not too long ago) for the cafeteria to grab some refreshments, considering they all had a rough, eventful night and hadn’t been outside the clinical walls in over 12 hours.

The side room’s door swung back and in walked Dr. Pressman, who was clinging to a binder of notes which could only be presumed to be Waverly’s information.

“How she doing, doctor?”

“Did everything go as expected?”

“Please, call me Shae…good to see you again”. It was the first time since Wynonna stormed out of the meeting, that Shae had come into contact with her again. The older girl couldn’t help but divert her eyes from the woman standing opposite her.

Nicole shifted to the edge of her seat, repositioning her hand on Waverly’s.

“The surgery was good”, she flicked through Waverly’s notes.

A sigh of relief fell from both girls.

“But I’ve done all I can do, it’s down to _you_ now”. The younger girl lay still on her bed, hazel eyes floating from Wynonna to her girlfriend. Both Nicole and Wynonna hadn’t noticed that Waverly had woken since they were solely focused on Shae.

The darker-haired girl looked towards her sister who looked pale – not at all like her usual glowing olive complexion. “How you feeling baby girl?”, she rose to her feet and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.

“Just” she cleared her throat, “sore and hungry”.

“Rosie’s gone to get us some food, she’ll be back soon”.

Nicole continued to speak to Shae, “Don’t worry. I’ll drive her to physio… _every week_ ”, the redhead stroked some of Waverly’s grown-out fringe from her eyelashes and placed a kiss onto her lips.

Again, the door to the room opened and in walked Rosita, who looked like she’d wiped the café out of sandwiches. “I didn’t know what you guys liked, so I got everything…” she seemed to stop walking and talking when she noticed the doctor. “Oops” she pressed her lips into a sealed line, “Sorry for interrupting”. She dropped the food and bottles she had stashed in her pockets on the bedside table and slumped in her seat near the back wall of the room.

Shae spoke again, “No worries, I’m all done here. And, ergh…since it’s Christmas, I’ll get the nurses to discharge you for this evening”.

Waverly had Nicole’s complete attention, and Wynonna thanked Shae once again.

* * *

** 8pm **

Wynonna sat on her ankle with one leg crossed and the other hanging down the cabinet while cradling her hot chocolate that Nicole had made for the group.

“Haught?”

“Earp?”, she continued to mix the cocoa powder into the hot milk.

“Nicole”.

The redhead stopped shaking the whipped cream, figuring that Wynonna was about to get serious. Her heart rate picked up and the thumping of her heart sat in her throat – Wynonna never gets serious. Nicole leaned back onto the kitchen table.

“I’m sorry for kinda disregarding your feelings throughout the last 24hours…”

“Kinda?” Nicole was defensive, she had the right to be. Waverly is not only Wynonna’s little sister but she was her girlfriend.

“C’mon, I’m trying to apologise to you”. Wynonna placed her mug off to the side. Nicole noticed the way the older girl started to pick at her cuticles, she knew this was Wynonna being genuine – truly realising her mistake.

The redhead pushed herself off the side whilst jokingly rolling her eyes. “Wynonna…I know what it felt like; the panic and worry in that moment”.

Wynonna’s reaction showed that she found what Nicole was saying hard to believe.

Nicole held up her hands in surrender, “Fine…okay, maybe not exactly but I could’ve supported you. You are my best friend after all”.

“Okay okay, don’t go soft on me Haught”, she hopped down off the counter and picked her mug back up.

“Bring it in”, Nicole stood with her arms open, wiggling her fingers beckoning Wynonna to come closer. She knew Wynonna enough to know she wasn’t big on hugging – or physical contact full stop, but this was something they both needed.

The shorter woman grew rigid in Nicole’s embrace, one arm wrapped around her back and the other stuck out to keep the liquid contents inside of the mug. She grumbled all the way through the hug, but even Wynonna would admit – there was something comforting about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've compiled the playlists into one big one - just to make it easier for everyone.
> 
> [ Drowning your demons playlist ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2QliA7qcg6bEtrBL3R8rhT?si=3PfkjN5HS2OC1mQSvHy0lw)
> 
> Thanks for reading :)


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